Talking dirty to your partner during sex can be a turn on. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to start. What I want to say seems to sound good in my head, but once the words reach my lips, I feel silly. Help!
Do you find it easy to talk dirty to you partner?
08/10/2010
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It's very easy for me, because we started dating online, and phone sex became quite regular until we met for the first time. So by that point it was super easy to talk dirty to my lover, and it still is. Dirty talk is a regular part of our play sessions. It always adds that certain element to make things really hot and heavy.
To start out, I hope this doesn't sound horrible, but try a glass of wine (or 2 or 3) before you start to talk dirty to your partner. Alcohol makes us less inhibited so you're more likely to go ahead and say what you mean. And they'll love it, I'm sure. It may sound silly at first, but once you see your lover's reaction, you'll want to do it more often and get more creative
To start out, I hope this doesn't sound horrible, but try a glass of wine (or 2 or 3) before you start to talk dirty to your partner. Alcohol makes us less inhibited so you're more likely to go ahead and say what you mean. And they'll love it, I'm sure. It may sound silly at first, but once you see your lover's reaction, you'll want to do it more often and get more creative
08/10/2010
I find talking in and of itself difficult during sex. It throws me off. I don't know why. Grunts and sighs are easy enough, though.
08/10/2010
Now, it is easy. I know the kinds of things that turn him on, and often I just say what is going through my mind. For us, "dirty talk" is a regular part of our sex. Not all the time, but often.
For years I was afraid to say anything "dirtier" than "Fuck me." or things like that. Now, I find I can get specific and say things that we both enjoy.
I LOVE when he talks dirty, but he has moods where he talks a lot, and some where he says nothing. Sometimes, if I ask him to, and he isn't in the mood, it sounds strained, so I just leave him be and do it myself.
For years I was afraid to say anything "dirtier" than "Fuck me." or things like that. Now, I find I can get specific and say things that we both enjoy.
I LOVE when he talks dirty, but he has moods where he talks a lot, and some where he says nothing. Sometimes, if I ask him to, and he isn't in the mood, it sounds strained, so I just leave him be and do it myself.
08/10/2010
I still struggle in this area.
08/10/2010
I find it far easier to do if I'm talking to a guy online or via text, but after I'm comfortable with a person and know their personal sexual likes and dislikes I've found it easier to verbalise my dirty thoughts. For me it's about feeling secure enough to show someone that side of my personality. If that makes sense?
08/10/2010
Despite being pretty comfortable with myself sexually I always feel on the spot when attempting to dirty talk. I feel like I sound silly. I can text or something but actually in person talking makes me feel awkward for some reason.
08/10/2010
I've always felt silly talking dirty in the bedroom or even moaning/screaming for that matter. But for a while now I've been expressing myself more verbally in the bedroom, and it is so much of a turn on for the both of us.
08/10/2010
I struggle with this, I can't do dirty talk. He can but it just embarrasses me.
08/10/2010
He doesn't like it when I give orders because I'm kind of bossy, so I've started "disguising" my instructions as dirty talk and it goes over better.
I think that would be the easiest kind of dirty talk to start with, saying what you want your partner to do to you, or what you are going to do to them, or giving a description of what's happening ("It feels so good when you...") rather than describing a fantasy or something where you would have to talk for an extended period of time.
The only way I can get my guy to do it is through texting, so maybe that would be easier for you, or over the phone.
I think that would be the easiest kind of dirty talk to start with, saying what you want your partner to do to you, or what you are going to do to them, or giving a description of what's happening ("It feels so good when you...") rather than describing a fantasy or something where you would have to talk for an extended period of time.
The only way I can get my guy to do it is through texting, so maybe that would be easier for you, or over the phone.
08/10/2010
Mostly just heavy breathing and the occasional 'don't stop!' not very exciting!
08/10/2010
I used to find it hard to do, but the more we do it, the easier it's gotten.
08/10/2010
It's really easy to feel silly or shy but it's part of the fun. It works out best when your partner is your best friend too.
I don't do it very often, or very well, but I love it when I hear it.
I don't do it very often, or very well, but I love it when I hear it.
08/10/2010
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Isn't that funny how its easier to text it then to say it in person? My husband and I are very active sexters. I love being able to get him hot wherever he might be. Foreplay has never been so much fun. Fingers crossed that the children never get hold of my cell. OMG...can you imagine.
Originally posted by
Love Buzz
I find it far easier to do if I'm talking to a guy online or via text, but after I'm comfortable with a person and know their personal sexual likes and dislikes I've found it easier to verbalise my dirty thoughts. For me it's about
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more
I find it far easier to do if I'm talking to a guy online or via text, but after I'm comfortable with a person and know their personal sexual likes and dislikes I've found it easier to verbalise my dirty thoughts. For me it's about feeling secure enough to show someone that side of my personality. If that makes sense?
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Thanks for you input.
08/10/2010
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I appreciate your comments. I agree, that its difficult to express yourself without feeling silly. Someone should make a manual that doesn't leave the reader feeling ridiculous.
Originally posted by
Lady Venus
I've always felt silly talking dirty in the bedroom or even moaning/screaming for that matter. But for a while now I've been expressing myself more verbally in the bedroom, and it is so much of a turn on for the both of us.
08/10/2010
I put sometimes. If you just think what comes to your mind then you don't really have to think and so it doesn't take away from it but sometimes I don't want to say what I'm thinking as I think my wife will think it's too far and if I have to actually think of what to say then that takes away from things as well.
08/10/2010
babyblue
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Oh wow, reading these responses I guess I didn't know how difficult this is for some gals. It turns guys on SO much. I mean they really really respond to it. Once you get that response, it becomes easier to say dirty things to him. I only just say one thing and I time it perfectly "Fuck me".
Originally posted by
Intrigued
Talking dirty to your partner during sex can be a turn on. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to start. What I want to say seems to sound good in my head, but once the words reach my lips, I feel silly. Help!
I can tell the moment when my guy fell in love with me. As we were in the middle of having sex for the first time, he said 'tell me what you want me to do' and I whispered 'fuck me, fuck me a lot' His eyes rolled back, his body jolted and he gasped. I knew right then that he was mine.
Maybe start lightly like mentioning a nipple or 'tits' then work your way up the naughty talk ladder.
You can thank me later.
08/11/2010
We rarely talk during sex. We also don't use "bad words" a lot at all even outside the bedroom. We aren't lacking without it--it's not our style.
08/11/2010
Dirty talk came pretty easily to me with my current partner, as we talked about sex a lot from the very beginning - often during sex itself! After a while I started to enjoy going on about what I wanted to do, what I liked that he was doing, etc. However, I still have trouble getting "in character" for D/s play (which we are new to but both very interested in). I just don't feel convincing as a dominant - it doesn't help that I break out in giggles when I think I sound silly. The best cure for this is being really turned on.
There are a few really good games you can play to help get into this. I highly recommend Sexuality.org's erotic talk article as a starting point.
There are a few really good games you can play to help get into this. I highly recommend Sexuality.org's erotic talk article as a starting point.
08/11/2010
I think it's hard to talk dirty to my husband. It just feels weird, and as you said, I feel silly. I don't know, it's just difficult. I have done it before, but it is hard for me. I would rather listen to him talk dirty to me. Haha.
08/11/2010
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Both guys love my filthy mouth Start with just a sexy husking voice...and ask things like "Does that feel good?" "Would you like more of that?" Then add some descriptions to what "that" is. You'll be a pro in no time!
Originally posted by
Intrigued
Talking dirty to your partner during sex can be a turn on. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to start. What I want to say seems to sound good in my head, but once the words reach my lips, I feel silly. Help!
08/11/2010
It is getting easier but it always turns me on when my wife talks dirty or is very vocal.
08/11/2010
I can write the best erotica in the world (okay, I've never really tried), but I can't say that stuff to my partner. I just find it awkward. I don't think he really likes it anyway.
08/11/2010
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I don't always have the confidence to, but sometimes I can do it. He has ADD though, so sometimes it's really hard to keep him focused, even with my clothes off. And my self esteem gets lower...
Originally posted by
Intrigued
Talking dirty to your partner during sex can be a turn on. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to start. What I want to say seems to sound good in my head, but once the words reach my lips, I feel silly. Help!
08/12/2010
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Thank you for your encouragement and suggestions.
Originally posted by
Airen Wolf
Both guys love my filthy mouth Start with just a sexy husking voice...and ask things like "Does that feel good?" "Would you like more of that?" Then add some descriptions to what "that" is. You'll be a pro in no time!
08/12/2010
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I completely agree with you. It is difficult to stay in character and not feel ridiculous verbally your thoughts. I keep thinking "do I sound like a porn film?". How corny! I love to stay in the moment, and not be distracted.
Originally posted by
joja
Dirty talk came pretty easily to me with my current partner, as we talked about sex a lot from the very beginning - often during sex itself! After a while I started to enjoy going on about what I wanted to do, what I liked that he was doing, etc.
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more
Dirty talk came pretty easily to me with my current partner, as we talked about sex a lot from the very beginning - often during sex itself! After a while I started to enjoy going on about what I wanted to do, what I liked that he was doing, etc. However, I still have trouble getting "in character" for D/s play (which we are new to but both very interested in). I just don't feel convincing as a dominant - it doesn't help that I break out in giggles when I think I sound silly. The best cure for this is being really turned on.
There are a few really good games you can play to help get into this. I highly recommend Sexuality.org's erotic talk article as a starting point. less
There are a few really good games you can play to help get into this. I highly recommend Sexuality.org's erotic talk article as a starting point. less
Thanks for the suggestion. I will definately check out the article.
08/12/2010
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I am so glad that I'm not alone in the dirty talk department. I've got the "fuck me" down pat, but during our reverse role play I would like to be more in control of the image I am portraying. I'm sure that sounded corny, but I would to feel like a dominant female, rather than feel like a poor substiute. I'm sure it is a confidence issue.
Originally posted by
babyblue
Oh wow, reading these responses I guess I didn't know how difficult this is for some gals. It turns guys on SO much. I mean they really really respond to it. Once you get that response, it becomes easier to say dirty things to him. I only just
...
more
Oh wow, reading these responses I guess I didn't know how difficult this is for some gals. It turns guys on SO much. I mean they really really respond to it. Once you get that response, it becomes easier to say dirty things to him. I only just say one thing and I time it perfectly "Fuck me".
I can tell the moment when my guy fell in love with me. As we were in the middle of having sex for the first time, he said 'tell me what you want me to do' and I whispered 'fuck me, fuck me a lot' His eyes rolled back, his body jolted and he gasped. I knew right then that he was mine.
Maybe start lightly like mentioning a nipple or 'tits' then work your way up the naughty talk ladder.
You can thank me later. less
I can tell the moment when my guy fell in love with me. As we were in the middle of having sex for the first time, he said 'tell me what you want me to do' and I whispered 'fuck me, fuck me a lot' His eyes rolled back, his body jolted and he gasped. I knew right then that he was mine.
Maybe start lightly like mentioning a nipple or 'tits' then work your way up the naughty talk ladder.
You can thank me later. less
08/12/2010
Sometimes my partner and I sort of dirty talk but it gets awkward in a funny way. We are often so caught up in the pleasure we are experiencing that sometimes what we say doesn't make sense. Atleast we try.
08/12/2010
It's hard for me because I feel shy and ridiculous, like I'm forcing what I'm saying even if I'm not.
08/13/2010
Even though I'm a talker, I find it hard to talk "dirty" to my partner. I will occasionally but I just feel so out of place.
08/14/2010