It is not weird and no using a toy doesnt make you lose your virginity. I actually think your doing the responsible thing and using a toy rather than having a one night stand and potentially regret it and feel bad about yourself.
Featured by EdenFantasys
Do you think it's weird for a virgin to have her first penetration by a toy?
08/01/2012
Not at all! That's how I did it, and I'm very thankful for it, because it let me figure out what I liked and how not to hurt myself.
08/07/2012
I don't think it counts as losing your virginity, and I personally feel that using toys makes losing your virginity a whole lot less painful!
08/08/2012
I don't think it's weird, and I don't think it's a loss of your virginity either.
08/09/2012
what causes a loss of virginity is up to you
08/09/2012
Quote:
I would not consider it losing your virginity.
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
08/10/2012
Virginity is a psychological concept. Most women have broken their hymen due to physical activity long before they ever have sex. I played with toys and penetration before I ever had sex. I don't think that anything took my virginity except my first boyfriend.
08/10/2012
I absolutely think it's normal, and I wouldn't consider it a loss of virginity.
08/10/2012
It's not weird at all. I don't think you'd be losing your virginity by using a toy.
08/10/2012
It depends on what you consider a virginity loss. I personally think losing virginity must involve a person, but that's just me.
08/10/2012
Quote:
I don't think it's weird.
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
08/12/2012
Quote:
Virginity is a social construct. and using the vibe would probably help ease anxiety- and also alert you to any problems with specific tightness and such.
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
08/12/2012
This is actually how I got my first sex toy. I don't tolerate pain very well, and so I decided I would condition my vagina a little bit. So I went and bought a vibrator and got all the painful messy stuff out of the way alone.
I might not share it with everyone I met on the street, but I don't think it's particularly weird. The only thing I would say is that you're probably not going to enjoy the toy for quite a bit.
I might not share it with everyone I met on the street, but I don't think it's particularly weird. The only thing I would say is that you're probably not going to enjoy the toy for quite a bit.
08/12/2012
Quote:
I'm a little confused. So you think virginity is so special that you think people should sell it in an act of prostitution?
Originally posted by
HarlequinBunnie
Once the hymen is torn all the way you are not a virgin. The definition of virginity for girls is an intact hymen. And for you thinking to loose it to a toy well I'm sorry I feel it's wrong. There are men out there who will pay big bucks for
...
more
Once the hymen is torn all the way you are not a virgin. The definition of virginity for girls is an intact hymen. And for you thinking to loose it to a toy well I'm sorry I feel it's wrong. There are men out there who will pay big bucks for a virgin. A while back a girl sold her virginity to a man for enough money to pay for her college tuition all the way up to a masters degree. What you do with your life is up to you and you are the one who has to live with the choices you make. I have always felt strongly about certain subjects and this is one of them.
I'm sorry if this comes off harshly I don't mean it too. I lost mine in an awful way so please forgive me for imposing my hang ups on you. Good luck to you and best wishes. less
I'm sorry if this comes off harshly I don't mean it too. I lost mine in an awful way so please forgive me for imposing my hang ups on you. Good luck to you and best wishes. less
Also, the hymen can be torn in all sorts of ways. It's very common for girls who participate in vigorous sports like horse riding and gymnastics to tear is as young girls. Are you saying that a nine year old isn't a virgin because her love of back flips?
08/12/2012
I'm a virgin and I use a dildo
08/21/2012
I think virginity is a completely antiquated, misogynistic and just plain stupid concept to begin with. But I define "sex" as "any act by 2 or more people that involves the genitalia of at least one of the individuals involved in a mutually consensual and pleasurable way." According to my definition, unless you count your sex toy as a person (with all the personhood and anti-abortion lingo being slung around who knows! But I certainly don't), then masturbation with a toy couldn't be considered sex. Even though I don't believe in "virginity" I don't think anyone could argue that you could lose your virginity without having sex and playing solo with a dildo or vibrator just isn't sex. I think it's smart to experiment and play with toys before first intercourse. The hymen is also an antiquated concept, at least in the way society teaches it. The hymen is a thin membrane held over from gestation in the womb. During gestation, the hymen protects the female fetus' internal sex organs. As the girl ages, especially once the hormones from puberty are introduced, the hymen reduces until, in most cases, it is a little fringe around the edge of her vaginal opening (there are exceptions to this rule and some girls may never have had one or theirs may have simply disappeared during development altogether). This little fringe is rarely "broken". It is not some barrier to be popped or perforated. It CAN be torn, but with proper stretching, lubrication, arousal and gentle handling, it can simply be stretched with no pain or discomfort, just like almost any other soft tissue in your body. Your first time doesn't have to hurt, there's no need for bleeding or tearing or breaking anything. Playing slowly, gently, with lube, by yourself with no pressure can allow you to adequately stretch your hymen and teach yourself to relax and accept penetration without pain. Thus, your first intercourse could be a much more enjoyable experience. Not to mention learning more about your body and your sexuality and your orgasms (because we are each responsible for OUR OWN orgams!) will help you enjoy sex and communicate your desires with future partners. I think playing with toys before you play with a partner is absolutely the way to go!
08/21/2012
I don't think it's weird nor considered a loss of virginity.
08/21/2012
Quote:
No offense, but selling your virginity or any form of sex entitles you as a prostitute. And that there is not right. Esp when it comes to living in the United States when they offer so many grants, loans and scholarships for schooling. And if you wanted to go by being completely torn, then all I got to do is wait 7 years and I'm a virgin again. And hey, your friend can go and prostitute herself for a house. Not meaning it rudely, but it's true. Go so long without having sex and you can pop your cherry all over again.
Originally posted by
HarlequinBunnie
Once the hymen is torn all the way you are not a virgin. The definition of virginity for girls is an intact hymen. And for you thinking to loose it to a toy well I'm sorry I feel it's wrong. There are men out there who will pay big bucks for
...
more
Once the hymen is torn all the way you are not a virgin. The definition of virginity for girls is an intact hymen. And for you thinking to loose it to a toy well I'm sorry I feel it's wrong. There are men out there who will pay big bucks for a virgin. A while back a girl sold her virginity to a man for enough money to pay for her college tuition all the way up to a masters degree. What you do with your life is up to you and you are the one who has to live with the choices you make. I have always felt strongly about certain subjects and this is one of them.
I'm sorry if this comes off harshly I don't mean it too. I lost mine in an awful way so please forgive me for imposing my hang ups on you. Good luck to you and best wishes. less
I'm sorry if this comes off harshly I don't mean it too. I lost mine in an awful way so please forgive me for imposing my hang ups on you. Good luck to you and best wishes. less
--------------
And back to another note,
Dictionary.com:
vir·gin [vur-jin] - noun
*** a person who has never had sexual intercourse.
*** not yet cultivated, explored, exploited, etc, by man: virgin territories
Medical Dictionary:
virgin vir·gin - n.
*** A person who has not experienced sexual intercourse.
So, no, using a toy does not count as loosing your virginity. Personally, I would suggest using toys. That way it doesn't hurt as much and it's as uncomfortable for the girl, both mentally and physically.
Also, I never broke and bled, neither during sex or maturation. So does that mean I'm still a virgin then by what some are saying?
08/21/2012
Quote:
I don't think it's weird.
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
08/21/2012
No, I don't think it's weird. What's wrong with experimenting by yourself before inviting someone?
08/21/2012
Quote:
Opinions like this are the product of a culture of women who don't understand their own bodies or sexualities and accept oppressive misogynistic views as fact and it makes me sad and angry. If this woman had her perceived "virginity" snatched from her in a violent, non-consensual, or otherwise traumatic way that's devastating and I'm very sorry for her but she's still misinformed. I'm not sure which is worse: the horrible thing that happened to her or the shame she was evidently made to feel because of it which has formed this offensive, repressed and highly unproductive and unhealthy viewpoint. The view she presents suggests that a victim of rape is no longer a virgin and that's not even taking into consideration the number of ways, as others in this thread mention, that a hymen may be torn or stretched before intercourse, or the fact that some women just don't have, and never had, one! The other offensive idea she presents is that the value of virginity is what a man is willing to pay for it and that a non-virginal women (even if she is so because of rape!) is less valuable because a man won't pay for her. This is ridiculous, antiquated, antifeminist and downright offensive. Her ideas smack of a female-self-loathing that has long plagued societies around the world to no purpose but to keep women oppressed and under control by men. The hymen as society has thought of it for far too long, as evidenced by the number of references in this thread, is a medically disproven MYTH.
Originally posted by
HarlequinBunnie
Once the hymen is torn all the way you are not a virgin. The definition of virginity for girls is an intact hymen. And for you thinking to loose it to a toy well I'm sorry I feel it's wrong. There are men out there who will pay big bucks for
...
more
Once the hymen is torn all the way you are not a virgin. The definition of virginity for girls is an intact hymen. And for you thinking to loose it to a toy well I'm sorry I feel it's wrong. There are men out there who will pay big bucks for a virgin. A while back a girl sold her virginity to a man for enough money to pay for her college tuition all the way up to a masters degree. What you do with your life is up to you and you are the one who has to live with the choices you make. I have always felt strongly about certain subjects and this is one of them.
I'm sorry if this comes off harshly I don't mean it too. I lost mine in an awful way so please forgive me for imposing my hang ups on you. Good luck to you and best wishes. less
I'm sorry if this comes off harshly I don't mean it too. I lost mine in an awful way so please forgive me for imposing my hang ups on you. Good luck to you and best wishes. less
Here are some EXCELLENT medically valid references on the topic.
link
link
link
link
Oooooooh!!! HarlequinBunnie, I'm very sorry you had what must have been a horribly traumatic experience. No one deserves that. And you clearly were not given the kind of support you needed to overcome that kind of trauma which is even more devastating. But you need to do some research and reevaluate, and you obviously have a lot of healing left to do.
08/21/2012
Quote:
I don't think it is weird at all.....I happened to pop my cherry with a banana :/ but I don't consider that my lost of virginity.
Originally posted by
marrythenight
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its
...
more
The reason I'm asking is because I was talking to some girlfriends about toys not too long ago, and they do know I'm a virgin, and I did say that I got an actual vibe recently (the bcurious bgood--it's still sitting in my closet in its box, unopened) and one of them said, "I would never lose my virginity to a sex toy!" Which of course started a conversation about what defines virginity, etc, but it's kind of stuck with me.
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
It's kind of an odd question, but do you think it'd be better to save first penetration for the "real deal", or just go for it with a toy? And would you even consider that loss of virginity? less
08/21/2012
Not weird at all! And your virginity is whatever you want it to be.
08/22/2012
in hindsight I would actually recommend that virgins try out some toys before having sex for the first time with a partner. I actually didn't find that sex felt physically great until after practicing with a toy (and having what I would consider my first real orgasm with a vibrator). I think masturbation really "trains" women how to enjoy sex (I can't speak for men, but that was my experience!).
08/22/2012
Sounds perfectly normal to me and a good practice for the real thing.
08/22/2012
I don't think it counts.
08/22/2012
You certainly are NOT weird! Just worry about what you feel in your heart of hearts as opposed to what your friends have to say.
08/22/2012
Wow, I didn't even think of this! I was just so sexually frustrated I needed something so I got a toy. Haha, I still consider myself a virgin and I didn't even consider that it might be weird.
10/25/2012
I think is even better like this, so not weird at all. You should enjoy your body and experiment so when you have your first time you know what you like. About losing virginity, well, is just not a concept I think people should worry at all.
10/26/2012
no not for me its not weird!
10/26/2012