I was sexually abused as a child so it was very, very hard for me to see sex as a positive and enjoyable thing. I recently lost my virginity, at 22, to my patient and caring boyfriend. We both put a lot of work in with reading relevant books, moving super slowly in the bedroom, practicing desensitization (dilating) to help me overcome vaginismus and doing trust-building exercises. I am still not 100 percent comfortable discussing my needs and desires in the bedroom but I feel much more independent. I think with time, my residual hang ups will lessen.
#SummerPleasure - Celebrate YOUR Independence!
07/05/2012
It’s usually hard to bring up sex with those you care about, out side the bedroom. There is a lot of personal risk involved with these conversations. Just because the topic is intimate and the person is someone you love, don’t back down from bringing up the things that are important to you.
07/05/2012
Sometimes, it just takes the right person to come along to hold up a mirror of what you should see in yourself.
07/05/2012
I think you have to just make it happen, if you don't talk to your partner they will never know.
07/05/2012
Quote:
Be knowledgable, Be smart, and be confident.
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
07/05/2012
I've pretty much always been comfortable with my sexuality but just recently discovered EF and wonderful, fabulous things toys can do. I've been married for almost 20 years so we don't really have a problem telling each other what we want
Awesome giveaway! Thanks EF
Awesome giveaway! Thanks EF
07/05/2012
My parents didn't really talk about sex at home, so I just kind of learned about it by myself (on the one hand they didn't talk about it; on the other hand, they didn't forbid me from learning about it or punish me when they thought I might be). I didn't get really comfortable talking about it until I found the right partner. I'd slowly gotten used to being more open about it through college, but because of the personal nature of sex and the risks you invite by sharing, it does sometimes take the right partner to make you really comfortable with sharing.
Sharing is a two-way street, so even if you are trying to make yourself more comfortable, you are in some ways dependent on how the person talking to you responds. So make sure that you start by talking to people you trust not to judge you who will protect you and your feelings. By the same token, you can be that kind of listener for someone else, which will make you more aware of who will be a good listener for you.
Sharing is a two-way street, so even if you are trying to make yourself more comfortable, you are in some ways dependent on how the person talking to you responds. So make sure that you start by talking to people you trust not to judge you who will protect you and your feelings. By the same token, you can be that kind of listener for someone else, which will make you more aware of who will be a good listener for you.
07/05/2012
Just over a year ago. I was in a bad car accident, and somehow walked away uninjured. I think it knocked something loose in me. I had a sexual identity crisis, if you will, shortly after that. Having happily identified as lesbian for most of my adult life, I found myself checking out dudes in the grocery store, at the gas station, pretty much wherever I was. It freaked me out so bad, I actually went to my doctor about it. I was having anxiety attacks, and feeling very confused. My doctor, lovely man that he is, gave me a Rx for Ativan, and the advice that no one gets to tell me how I can express my sexuality, and that as long as I'm attending to both my physical and emotional safety, I should explore whatever I feel like exploring. As it turned out, his kind words were enough. I didn't even end up taking the pills. I decided to spend that summer doing whatever the hell I felt like doing sexually and found many lovely men, women, and couples to explore my new sexual self with. My one rule was that it was all about me; this was my adventure, and anyone was welcome to come along for the ride, as long as it was working for me. I had to cut a couple of guys loose for trying to make my adventure all about them, but I did it kindly. I am still on that sexual self-discovery adventure over a year later, and I hope it continues throughout my life!
07/05/2012
Quote:
This is hard question. Sex was always an open topic in my house. I could have expressed my sexually at a very young age but thank god I was mature enough to wait. I was 21 when I first got sexually active and I've alway sbeen open and honest. Always been fun : D
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
07/05/2012
I grew up with the impression that my mom that sex was bad, dirty, etc. I told her this once and she was shocked. But regardless of what she was or wasn't intentionally telling me, it certainly affected me...
07/05/2012
I grew up in a sexually abusive household. Around 13-14, I ran away and started getting interested in BDSM. I started meeting people that went through similar traumatic events and we helped each other learn that sex could be postive. I'm still trying to be more verbal about it, but it can be hard with a gag in your mouth!
07/05/2012
markj0917
have never been ashamed of my sexuality
07/05/2012
Quote:
For me, my views on sexuality and love were tinted by my parent's views on sexuality. I came to be able to declare my independence sexually when i realized the desires and feelings i had for certain people were normal and did not need to be looked down upon
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
07/05/2012
Quote:
There are times at which I do not feel comfortable discussing my desires or sex in general. Yet, I find that with friends I can talk about sex as though it were something as mundane as what I had for breakfast. For me it depends upon how much I trust an individual as well as the circumstances regarding a conversation. Sex for the most part wasn't discussed until my latter teen years. Even then, I found there are things you just never want to know about certain individuals such as your parents...
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
07/05/2012
I grew up in a house where it wasnt really discussed but I got the "Birds and Bees" talk off my dad when I was 11 or so. I cant say I have ever felt ashamed of myself for my sexuality but I don't discuss it in too much detail with anyone who doesnt need to know.
07/05/2012
After I was with my bf for a few years I started to feel a lot more comfortable. I can still be a little uncomfortable and embarrassed about it all, but things are only getting better
Sex in our house growing up wasn't shamed upon or encouraged. It simply wasn't talked about - period.
Sex in our house growing up wasn't shamed upon or encouraged. It simply wasn't talked about - period.
07/05/2012
I'm quite comfortable expressing myself in the bedroom, I've only had 3 partners so I honestly don't know where the confidence came from. lol
07/05/2012
My first boyfriend used to harass me for sex all the time. I never gave it to him, but he would call me names and get mad at me for it. One time, I almost gave in, but I got scared and started crying. Obviously, it just wasn't the time for me. But he would get so mad at me for "wasting a condom". I was 15-16 at this time. Not only would he make me feel bad, but his father would tell me to do it, too! It's taken me a long time to get over it. It's been about six to seven years or so. My boyfriend now is wonderful about sex, he's never made me feel bad about it.. in fact, he didn't pressure me at all, I was the one who decided that we should do it first. But I still have sexual anxiety.. but I am not sure if it has to do with the sexual experiences in my life, or just because I suffer from social anxiety to begin with. :/ But things have been getting better the last few weeks. Thanks to EF!
07/05/2012
Quote:
For me it would have been after I got married and figured out what I did and didn't like. There are some boundaries I have come to set from experimenting and It's all about being comfortable with who you are.
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
07/05/2012
Quote:
I might be someone who's uncomfortable with being open about my desires. I would suggest to others like myself to be honest. People that care about you should be happy with whatever makes you happy
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
07/05/2012
I'm still a bit uncomfortable with myself, but I hope to change that.
07/05/2012
Quote:
I still do not feel I can declare my "sexual independence". Whatever my decision, I know that those around me will not disown, demean or deride me for my choices. Simply put, my sexuality is something I am still exploring, albeit on my own and in private. Once I know for certain what I want or need for myself, I know I can be open and honest with those around me.
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
I hope that those of you who find yourselves in situations less desirable than my own will come to know that true friends like you for who you are, and that a loving family can come to at least understand your decisions. Do what is right for you first, then use whatever you have left to try to nurture understanding in those around you. Just be safe about it.
07/05/2012
Quote:
I come from an immigrant Asian family, and was never really raised with "normal" American views on sex and sexuality. I was raised with more Asian sensibilities towards the normalcy of sex and have always been lucky to have that support from family.
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
I always tell people that you need to be comfortable with yourself before anything else, then you will find expressing yourself will come easily
07/05/2012
Quote:
I still have a hard time, sometimes, saying what I want in the bedroom. I over think things and tend to get in my own way. Having partners who truly care about me helps me get past my mental BS and say what I truly want.
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
07/05/2012
I never really had a problem with my sexuality. I had pretty great parents who weren't inappropriate, but I knew about sex and that it was a good thing.
There's definitely someone out there for you that will make you feel comfortable and secure in who you are. Don't waste your time with someone who doesn't do that for you.
There's definitely someone out there for you that will make you feel comfortable and secure in who you are. Don't waste your time with someone who doesn't do that for you.
07/05/2012
jaymesmom
Quote:
I think it started when I finally met a MAN that is mature and loves my fun ideas and is open to anything I suggest. You just have to know deep down that you can trust this person with your secrets and not feel ashamed or too self conscious to do fun and interesting things with him! It's so much fun and very satisfying!!
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
07/05/2012
Quote:
I think I'm still learning to express myself openly, it's hard. I think I began to when I was around 22 or so.
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
My advice? Try to figure out what you like and tell your partner what it is. And pay attention to what they like. Ask questions and encourage them to do the same. I think it should be a give and take, not one sided in either direction.
07/05/2012
Quote:
I found someone who I really loved, and after that expressing myself sexually just came naturally
Originally posted by
Ansley
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the ... more
Sexuality is a very personal thing and a lot of us have grown up in homes where sex was shameful or done as a wifely duty or just never talked about at all. Or, even worse still - it was something that was used as a weapon in the relationships that were supposed to be models for our own behaviors.
For those of us who were lucky enough to have parents that engaged us in conversation on the matter, the road to adulthood and expressing our sexuality came a little easier.
For many of us it was difficult to get over the negative things we learned about sex as we were growing up and it seems that we have a large community here that has decided enough is enough and did something about it.
When do you think it was that you were able to declare your sexual independence and express yourself honestly and openly in the bedroom?
Do you have any advice for those who still do not feel comfortable with expressing their desires? less
07/05/2012
Fantasy box! write it down, have your partner read it when you arent around!
07/06/2012
well, actually i don't really feel i could declare my sexual independence. i think it's because i've just started open up as a person with my boy friend, and i need some time (and understanding from my partner) to feel like i can express my sexuality.
07/06/2012