The New Intimacy

Naked Reader Book Club Discussion: THE SMART GIRL'S GUIDE TO PORN and REAL LIVE NUDE GIRL (September 28, 7-11 PM EST)

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Contributor: Kristina Wright Kristina Wright
Welcome to the Naked Reader Book Club! I'm your book club moderator Kristina Wright and tonight we're continuing our September discussion about Girl Power with two fabulous titles! Tonight we're talking about women who love porn with Violet Blue's THe Smart Girl's Guide to Porn and living in a sex positive culture with Carol Queen's Real Live Nude Girl.


The Smart Girl's Guide to Porn

Violet Blue

Thee secret is out: Women watch porn. A recent study by Glamour magazine found that 87 percent of women ages 25 to 39 enjoy porn as part of their self-defined healthy sexual lifestyles—even more than use sex toys. In The Smart Girl's Guide to Porn, acclaimed sex educator Violet Blue tells women how to find porn they'll like, from favorite turn-ons and women-friendly DVDs to podcasts and porn groups on the Web. She shows how to reconcile fantasy with real-life desires, and how smart girls can maintain their own beauty standards when the people on screen seem impossibly buff, smooth, and surgically enhanced. Looking for authentic sex scenes? Thinking of sharing porn with a lover? Wonder which browser is safest for Internet porn surfing? The Smart Girl's Guide to Porn has the answers.

****

Real Live Nude Girl: Chronicles of Sex-Positive Culture, Second Edition

Carol Queen

Hop on the express train to sexual enlightenment with sex educator and self-avowed whore Dr. Carol Queen. Whether writing about the joys of being spanked into erotic bliss, performing in a red-light district peep show, partaking of the pleasures of the new safe sex clubs, or lobbying for the pro-pornography platform, Queen is an enthusiastic advocate for sexual pleasure.

****

Whether you've read the books or not, you are certain to have an opinion on the subject of living in a sex-positive culture where women not only enjoy porn and sex toys, but embrace their sexuality willingly and openly in whatever form it may take!

Of course, we can't talk about a sex-positive culture without considering the influence of feminism, but what about the internet, where all manner of sex culture is available at our fingertips? Has the internet, feminism, your geographic location or simply age and wisdom opened you up to new ideas about sex? What, exactly, does "sex positive" mean to you? Is it limited to women, or can men benefit from the concept as well?

Let's talk about your first introduction to porn, sex toys and erotica. Did Carol Queen's Real Live Nude Girl have you nodding your head in agreement about female submission and exploring sexual kinks in and out of the bedroom? Were you scribbling notes in the margin of Violet Blue's Smart Girl's Guide to Porn?

This is as academic as it gets around here in the Naked Reader Book Club, so pull up a chair, grab that glass of wine (or cup of coffee, as the night progresses) and let's talk about sex! They say the brain is the real sex organ and I know you all will be greatly stimulated by the end of the night!

Welcome to the Club!
09/23/2010
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Contributor: LicentiouslyYours LicentiouslyYours
Quote:
Originally posted by Kristina Wright
Welcome to the Naked Reader Book Club! I'm your book club moderator Kristina Wright and tonight we're continuing our September discussion about Girl Power with two fabulous titles! Tonight we're talking about women who love porn with ... more
The meeting doors are open! Welcome everybody, to the latest Naked Reader Book Club meeting.

As promised, I have something special for everybody who wanders in tonight—from now until tomorrow (September 29) at 11:59 PM, you can use the coupon code: 24Z4AY for 30% off book purchases on Eden Fantasys.

So if you are itching to buy one of the books we are talking about tonight or any other book on our list— you've got another reason to put your order in tonight!
09/28/2010
Contributor: Kristina Wright Kristina Wright
Quote:
Originally posted by LicentiouslyYours
The meeting doors are open! Welcome everybody, to the latest Naked Reader Book Club meeting.

As promised, I have something special for everybody who wanders in tonight—from now until tomorrow (September 29) at 11:59 PM, you can use the coupon ... more
What a fabulous offer, Laurel!

Welcome, everyone!
09/28/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by LicentiouslyYours
The meeting doors are open! Welcome everybody, to the latest Naked Reader Book Club meeting.

As promised, I have something special for everybody who wanders in tonight—from now until tomorrow (September 29) at 11:59 PM, you can use the coupon ... more
Very cool!

I'm here - ill-prepared, but here.
09/28/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Coupon sounds awesome!

And I don't have teh sick anymore, so I'll be more lively tonight!
09/28/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Also, I'm not sure if we're supposed to post this here or somewhere else or at all, but I did tweet and tell people to get here now, lol
09/28/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
Coupon sounds awesome!

And I don't have teh sick anymore, so I'll be more lively tonight!
Yay!
09/28/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
So how do we wanna kick this off tonight?
09/28/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
So how do we wanna kick this off tonight?
I'm in no position to start...I didn't read either of them I'll be better in October though...I've either read or am currently reading all 3 books for next month.
09/28/2010
Contributor: *Keona* *Keona*
I'm here....hey everybody
09/28/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by *Keona*
I'm here....hey everybody
Hey there!
09/28/2010
Contributor: Kristina Wright Kristina Wright
Hi Everyone! Welcome to the chat. Tonight we're talking about porn and sex positivity with Violet Blue's THe Smart GIrl's Guide to Porn and Carol Queen's Real Live Nude Girl.

So... let's kick things off with a little talk about porn. Like it? Hate it? Watch it? Curious about it? If you've read the Smart Girl's Guide to Porn, what did you like (or not like, as the case may be) about it?
09/28/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by *Keona*
I'm here....hey everybody
Hi Ke
09/28/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
I'm in no position to start...I didn't read either of them I'll be better in October though...I've either read or am currently reading all 3 books for next month.
Well I read Real Live Nude Girl, and I thought it was a really great book. Granted, it took me forever to get past the first section, but once I did I couldn't put it down. I feel the same way about sexuality as Carol Queen does, that the only real question about it should be "is it consensual" and I'm passing this book around my circle of friends too.
09/28/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Kristina Wright
Hi Everyone! Welcome to the chat. Tonight we're talking about porn and sex positivity with Violet Blue's THe Smart GIrl's Guide to Porn and Carol Queen's Real Live Nude Girl.

So... let's kick things off with a little ... more
I do watch porn. Not religiously or anything like that, but I indulge occasionally.
09/28/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Kristina Wright
Hi Everyone! Welcome to the chat. Tonight we're talking about porn and sex positivity with Violet Blue's THe Smart GIrl's Guide to Porn and Carol Queen's Real Live Nude Girl.

So... let's kick things off with a little ... more
Love it. Watch it alone and with my boyfriend. I actually subscribe to a mail rental service (kind of like netflix, but with porn). I haven't read the book, although I'm sure by the end of tonight, I'll want to!
09/28/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
Love it. Watch it alone and with my boyfriend. I actually subscribe to a mail rental service (kind of like netflix, but with porn). I haven't read the book, although I'm sure by the end of tonight, I'll want to!
Now I have to ask, what mail rental service carries porn?
09/28/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
Now I have to ask, what mail rental service carries porn?
LOL, there are actually a few. I looked into Sugar DVD and Bush DVD (lovely name, huh?) before deciding on adult dvd empire. It's priced about the same as netflix or blockbuster, 3 out at a time, and you build a queue on line.
09/28/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
LOL, there are actually a few. I looked into Sugar DVD and Bush DVD (lovely name, huh?) before deciding on adult dvd empire. It's priced about the same as netflix or blockbuster, 3 out at a time, and you build a queue on line.
That's pretty awesome. I don't watch enough to justify something like that, so I use myfreepaysite.com
09/28/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
That's pretty awesome. I don't watch enough to justify something like that, so I use myfreepaysite.com
I had considered stuff like that but I really prefer having it on the tv, not only being able to watch it on my small screen laptop. And I rarely watch the same one more than once, so buying the dvd's doesn't make sense either.
09/28/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
I had considered stuff like that but I really prefer having it on the tv, not only being able to watch it on my small screen laptop. And I rarely watch the same one more than once, so buying the dvd's doesn't make sense either.
I almost prefer it on the laptop, but that's because I'm still living at home and like knowing that I can very easily make it look like I was just browsing the net (even if I know I don't need to cuz I'm home alone), lol
09/28/2010
Contributor: Kayla Kayla
I wasn't as impressed by the Smart Girl's Guide to Porn as I was by the Smart Girl's Guide to the G-spot. I feel like Violet Blue didn't include the same humor.
09/28/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
I almost prefer it on the laptop, but that's because I'm still living at home and like knowing that I can very easily make it look like I was just browsing the net (even if I know I don't need to cuz I'm home alone), lol
That makes sense. I live alone so it's really no big deal here.
09/28/2010
Contributor: Kristina Wright Kristina Wright
Speaking of porn, Violet's book addresses all the concerns women might have about it: unrealistic expectations of women, distaste for "money" shots, etc. Do you think there are any negatives to mainstream porn? Do you steer away from mainstream porn in favor of alternative, women-focused or amateur porn?
09/28/2010
Contributor: Kristina Wright Kristina Wright
Quote:
Originally posted by Kayla
I wasn't as impressed by the Smart Girl's Guide to Porn as I was by the Smart Girl's Guide to the G-spot. I feel like Violet Blue didn't include the same humor.
Interesting point. What would you like to have seen her do differently? (Or was it just the lack of humor?)
09/28/2010
Contributor: *Keona* *Keona*
I watch porn. Love it when it's real good porn and not that fake stuff thats floating around. There was a time when I think I was watching too much of it though. I blame my dad cause he left one of his tapes in the vcr when I was a kid and I've been watching ever since lol
09/28/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Kristina Wright
Speaking of porn, Violet's book addresses all the concerns women might have about it: unrealistic expectations of women, distaste for "money" shots, etc. Do you think there are any negatives to mainstream porn? Do you steer away from ... more
I do prefer amateur sometimes only because I think the bigger production houses put forth unrealistic body ideas, not only for women, but men. Most women don't have super tiny waits, perfectly flat bellies, or chests full of silicone, and most men don't have 9 or 10 inch erections either. I'll watch it now and then but too much of it just makes the whole thing seem unrealistic. Those tend to be the same ones I find very unrealistic and over-acted as well.
09/28/2010
Contributor: Kayla Kayla
Quote:
Originally posted by Kristina Wright
Interesting point. What would you like to have seen her do differently? (Or was it just the lack of humor?)
I just feel like the book wasn't written in the same, humorous, blunt manner that the Guide to G-Spot was. Maybe it was just me though. I had just finished another feminine porn guide though.
09/28/2010
Contributor: *Keona* *Keona*
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
I do prefer amateur sometimes only because I think the bigger production houses put forth unrealistic body ideas, not only for women, but men. Most women don't have super tiny waits, perfectly flat bellies, or chests full of silicone, and most ... more
I hate the porn with the terrible storylines, music, and bad acting. Also I hate the kind where the man talks entirely too much to the point he's saying things that make no sense at all. Major turn off. If I have to fast forward through most of it then its bad.
09/28/2010
Contributor: Kayla Kayla
Quote:
Originally posted by Kristina Wright
Speaking of porn, Violet's book addresses all the concerns women might have about it: unrealistic expectations of women, distaste for "money" shots, etc. Do you think there are any negatives to mainstream porn? Do you steer away from ... more
I never was really interested in mainstream porn, and it didn't turn me on, but I never thought anything of it. Recently, I watched some of Reel Queer Productions (a feminist company), and the porn was just so amazingly hot! I don't think I'll ever go back to watching mainstream porn for arousal ever again. I also can't imagine why mainstream porn would be something anyone would find attractive.
09/28/2010