Keeping your name after marriage?

Contributor: VieuxCarre VieuxCarre
I heard this discussed on the Today Show this morning and thought I'd ask here. How many of you have changed your name, or would change your name, after marriage? Would you keep your last name after marriage? Vote and discuss!
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
I am female and...
VieuxCarre , Hot'n'Bothered , DeliciousSurprise , Envy , Darling Jen , Tori Rebel , Persephone Nightmare , Selective Sensualist , beautifulpierced , P'Gell , Madeira , Waterfall , Hannah Savage , Red Vinyl Kitty , gone77 , Alicia , sexysweetieshan , Jul!a , sarahbear , Coralbell , LittleBoPeep , Sammi , Not here , clp , Tuesday , Trashley , Adriana Ravenlust , ~LaUr3n~ , Melissa221 , Liz2 , buzzvibe , Pleasure Piratess , Jenniae09 , imp , deadpoet , Dusk , Love Buzz , Jobthingy , Airen Wolf , GeekWife , Danielle1220 , lovehurts , qspark , SomewhatSomewhere , Midway through , Taylor Violet LXIX , Lonewolf , Sapphire Pet , Andromeda , the bedroom blogger , *HisMrs* , C4ss , RosesThorns , Beaners , SexyTabby , PussyGalore , liilii080 , Lady Venus , rdytogo , sbon , pinkcupcakes , darthkitt3n , LikeSunshineDust , Illusional , Raggedy Andie , Angel deSanguine , BadassFatass , Eliza , A Closet Slut (aka nipplepeople) , Ajax , girl next door , joja , lezergirl , Eden C. , Cream in the Cupcake , Valentinka , chidoll , EJ , Ms. Spice , Breas , hjtee , Ivy Wilde , Crystal1 , PussyPurr , EdenG , aliceinthehole , TameTemptress , Kynky Kytty , CoffeeCup , toxie m , Owl Identified , xyrella , Pink Jewel , Love Perpetua , Peggi , M121212 , jedent , cburger , Bignuf , Hot 'N Sexy TexasMama , Pixel , emilia , Rarity , Philia , Silverdrop , mpfm , jacki , ily , TheSlyFox , pasdechat , Gone (LD29) , pirkit , Missmarc , MissCara , Deeder , Nyxx , pootpootpoot , Melan!e , asphyxia , NikkiL , bayosgirl , hall5885 , Badass , Beck , xMila , Buttercup Green , wrmbreze , MissCandyland , Sundae Sparkles , sexxxkitten , Emerlyn , Masokisti , Greenleaf , Noelle , SecretKinksters , Feisty , ViVix , Anne , amplified to rock , Supervixen , Lildrummrgurl7 , SneakersAndPearls , Kitten has left the site , *Camoprincess* , Pandwhora , natashaanime , AmethystSmoke , lovebites , mdnght , marshmallow , mr115393 , Rossie
152
I am male and...
Kindred , ToyTimeTim , Sir , Mr. E , Viktor Vysheslav Malkin , BJismyname , dv8 , Lummox , slynch , Keegski , T&A1987 , Devy , Errant Venture , MistressDandelion , BlooJay , lulz , michael scofield
17
I am married and did change my last name
Selective Sensualist , P'Gell , Red Vinyl Kitty , Alicia , sexysweetieshan , Apinkjellybean04 , Jul!a , sarahbear , Sammi , Adriana Ravenlust , Melissa221 , buzzvibe , Pleasure Piratess , Airen Wolf , GeekWife , Danielle1220 , *HisMrs* , SexyTabby , rdytogo , Angel deSanguine , hjtee , TameTemptress , Pink Jewel , Bignuf , Hot 'N Sexy TexasMama , Fierce Like Tiger , emilia , Silverdrop , mpfm , Pinkshirt , Deeder , Nyxx , Beck , xMila , Buttercup Green , wrmbreze , HisOneAndOnly , booboo111926 , yarii , Noelle , SneakersAndPearls , Passion plum , Kitten has left the site , *Camoprincess*
44
I married and did not change my last name
Kindred , Tori Rebel , ToyTimeTim , Tuesday , sxysioux , Mr. E , Lummox , slynch , Kkay , Ivy Wilde , Philia , Silverdrop , Gone (LD29) , MistressDandelion , bayosgirl , Rod Ronald , AmethystSmoke , Rossie
18
I am not married, but will change my name
VieuxCarre , Envy , Persephone Nightmare , Waterfall , Hannah Savage , Coralbell , LittleBoPeep , Not here , Trashley , onehotmomma , ~LaUr3n~ , deadpoet , Dusk , UrNaughtyaAngel , Jobthingy , SomewhatSomewhere , Andromeda , the bedroom blogger , RosesThorns , Beaners , PussyGalore , liilii080 , Lady Venus , pinkcupcakes , BJismyname , darthkitt3n , hive83 , LikeSunshineDust , Illusional , BadassFatass , Ajax , BadgersRose , Cream in the Cupcake , Ms. Spice , Breas , Crystal1 , EdenG , toxie m , Peggi , Pixel , Rarity , jacki , TheSlyFox , MissCara , pootpootpoot , MissCandyland , Sundae Sparkles , sexxxkitten , Lady of the Lab , Masokisti , SecretKinksters , Anne , Supervixen , natashaanime
54
I am not married and will not change my name
clp , HisLittleGirl , Sir , Liz2 , Jenniae09 , Viktor Vysheslav Malkin , Love Buzz , lovehurts , qspark , Serendipity , Midway through , Taylor Violet LXIX , Lonewolf , C4ss , dv8 , A Closet Slut (aka nipplepeople) , girl next door , joja , lezergirl , Valentinka , chidoll , EJ , Keegski , aliceinthehole , CoffeeCup , Owl Identified , Love Perpetua , Devy , M121212 , Errant Venture , pasdechat , pirkit , Missmarc , Melan!e , NikkiL , hall5885 , BlooJay , Gina RPG Geek , Scrawberry78 , Emerlyn , Greenleaf , Feisty , amplified to rock , Pandwhora , lovebites , marshmallow , mr115393
47
Other - Discuss!
Hot'n'Bothered , DeliciousSurprise , Darling Jen , Chilipepper , Madeira , gone77 , Gunsmoke , ~LaUr3n~ , imp , lamira , Sapphire Pet , Kimbertrees , sbon , 34 , Raggedy Andie , Eliza , joja , Eden C. , hjtee , PussyPurr , aliceinthehole , Kynky Kytty , T&A1987 , Love Perpetua , Peggi , M121212 , jedent , cburger , Stagger13 , ily , pasdechat , Gone (LD29) , asphyxia , NikkiL , Badass , Beck , travelnurse , ViVix , Lildrummrgurl7 , *Camoprincess* , mdnght , michael scofield
42
Total votes: 374 (195 voters)
Poll is closed
09/30/2010
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Contributor: VieuxCarre VieuxCarre
If I ever get married, I do want to change my name just because I want no link to my biological father whatsoever. Plus, I feel that changing my last name to my partner's makes me more one with him. But, that's just me
09/30/2010
Contributor: Hot'n'Bothered Hot'n'Bothered
I guess I'm kind of other. I suppose legally I did change my last name (SSN was done very quickly, but DL took years...long story).

But there are instances where I use my maiden name instead....
09/30/2010
Contributor: DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
I am unmarried but I expect I will hyphenate my name.

I will expect my partner to do the same.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Kindred Kindred
I did not change my name, and my wife took my last name but kept her own as well. However, what can be confusing is that she legally now has 4 names (given, middle, maiden, and last). Her maiden name is no longer a part of her last name.

Personally, I didn't care either way if she changed her name or not. I think it's silly that a bride traditionally takes the grooms name. Why? I would be fine if she kept her own. The only thing I would have been unsure about is how to name our kids.

I know a couple that created a new last name that is a combination of both of their last names. That way parts of both families get passed on.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Envy Envy
I'll change my name, to keep with tradition and all.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Darling Jen Darling Jen
I'd consider changing my name. It really depends on a lot of things like my future partner's last name and if it's better/worse than mine. Tradition means nothing to me. But it would be nice if we had the same last name, whatever it turns out to be. I did always like the idea of making a new last name together.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
I was married (ok, technically still am but it's just a matter of paperwork and time) and never changed my name. I didn't see the point. Funny thing is, if I marry my current boyfriend, which I have every intention of doing in a couple of years, I will take his name. I think in my first marriage, I was younger and settling for something I didn't really want but felt expected to do, and wanted my name for my independence and separate identity....with the person I'm with now, I want to be intertwined with him in every way possible and have his family's name.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
I did not change my name, and my wife took my last name but kept her own as well. However, what can be confusing is that she legally now has 4 names (given, middle, maiden, and last). Her maiden name is no longer a part of her last name. ... more
This is interesting, but I can't help but wonder what the second generation of such families would do when it comes to naming their kids. For example, John Smith-Jones marries Jane Harris-White. What would their child's last name be? Smith-Jones-Harris-Whi te?

To make it more of a tongue twister, imagine what the names of the offspring of Smith-Jones-Harris-Whi te and Hill-Washington-Black- James would be!
09/30/2010
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
I married and changed my name ... regretted it just about everyday after that because it's difficult for most people to pronounce and anybody who glances at it always thinks it's an entirely different name. (I have since learned that my psychology teacher is correct - people are cognitive misers and will only look at the first two letters and last letter of a word to know what it is. It never worked with my last name.)

I am going to cherish the day when the divorce goes through and I can change it back to my maiden name again (which may be common, but it's easy to recognize and pronounce). Yes, there may only be a dozen people with my husband's last name and I was one of those distinct few, but I don't want to be associated with that family anymore.

If I ever get married again, I'm keeping my maiden name. A lot less legal hassles.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Kindred Kindred
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
This is interesting, but I can't help but wonder what the second generation of such families would do when it comes to naming their kids. For example, John Smith-Jones marries Jane Harris-White. What would their child's last name be? ... more
They didn't simply hyphenate their names, they actually merged the names together and made a completely new one. So in your example, if Smith married Jones, they made something like Josmith for both of their last names.
09/30/2010
Contributor: beautifulpierced beautifulpierced
i voted but my married and changed the name didnt go threw.. but yes i married and took my Husbands last name..
09/30/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
I married and changed my name ... regretted it just about everyday after that because it's difficult for most people to pronounce and anybody who glances at it always thinks it's an entirely different name. (I have since learned that my ... more
Why do you have to wait until you're divorced to change it back? You can normally just file paperwork to change it to pretty much whatever you want, whenever you want.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Gary Gary
Quote:
Originally posted by VieuxCarre
If I ever get married, I do want to change my name just because I want no link to my biological father whatsoever. Plus, I feel that changing my last name to my partner's makes me more one with him. But, that's just me
I had thought about changing my name in the past for the exact same reason, but since my name also comes from my grandfather who was very inspirational to me, I opted not to.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Madeira Madeira
I am female and I do intend to keep my last name or hyphenate. I really like that in my real name I have alliteration and my name just generally sounds good to me... so I don't want to change it.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
Why do you have to wait until you're divorced to change it back? You can normally just file paperwork to change it to pretty much whatever you want, whenever you want.
Costs (lots of) money to file - may as well get it done at the same time as the divorce and make it official.
09/30/2010
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Wife took my name and she never thought anything about it nor did I. We're kinda old fashion when it comes to stuff like that. Still would not have bothered me if she kept her maiden name.
09/30/2010
Contributor: gone77 gone77
I have no intention of getting married, but if I was going to, I'd consider changing my name. I know of a guy who took his wife's last name. I'm not big on the whole traditional woman takes her husband's last name to keep the name alive down generations. I find it overrated. *shrug*
09/30/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Ok so I'm not married right now, but I will be in a few months and I plan on taking his name. I don't know why but with him I never really thought of keeping my last name.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
I am male and married. My wife changed her last name, merged her first and middle names - and uses her maiden-name as a middle name! How's that for creativity!
09/30/2010
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
I took my husband's last name, and swapped my middle name for my old last name (I always hated my middle name). No hyphens or anything, but that way I could keep my maiden name, which I loved, after a fashion.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Not here Not here
To be honest, I hate my last name. I can't wait to get rid of it! My man's last name is much nicer, and very easy to spell so I am psyched to take his

I would do the swapping my maiden name for my middle name, because I'm not a fan of my middle name either (Ruth- Jessica Ruth sounds so ugly to me!) but I think it would sound weird with my man's last name.

Of course, this is assuming he proposes to me! (which I'm pretty damn sure he will..)
09/30/2010
Contributor: nolongerhere nolongerhere
I hyphenated...It seemed like a good idea at the time...keep my identity, while still making my husband happy...However. I now have the longest name ever. It doesn't fit on my credit card or bank accounts. I also get a lot of raised eyebrows when I get carded...I would probably just stick to my own next time. Changing all your accounts, SS card, etc SUCKS!
09/30/2010
Contributor: nolongerhere nolongerhere
Quote:
Originally posted by nolongerhere
I hyphenated...It seemed like a good idea at the time...keep my identity, while still making my husband happy...However. I now have the longest name ever. It doesn't fit on my credit card or bank accounts. I also get a lot of raised eyebrows when ... more
For clarity, I am not planning to marry again anytime soon, I meant if I could do it again...
09/30/2010
Contributor: clp clp
I'm alright with the hyphening, but I won't be losing my name. Either way, it is just another name on the long list--my full name is already at 6, might as well make it 7.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Tuesday Tuesday
Quote:
Originally posted by VieuxCarre
If I ever get married, I do want to change my name just because I want no link to my biological father whatsoever. Plus, I feel that changing my last name to my partner's makes me more one with him. But, that's just me
I completely relate to this. I kept my last name even though its boring and associated with my father just out of principle. I'm not my husband's possession.

My husband didn't care as long as our kids have his last name.
09/30/2010
Contributor: VieuxCarre VieuxCarre
Quote:
Originally posted by Tuesday
I completely relate to this. I kept my last name even though its boring and associated with my father just out of principle. I'm not my husband's possession.

My husband didn't care as long as our kids have his last name.
Well, my relationship is different LOL. I am considered a possession, but, ya know, that's what I signed on for.

But yeah, I'd mainly change it to get rid of my ties to the douche nozzle that contributed to my birth.
09/30/2010
Contributor: Trashley Trashley
If I married a man, I'd change my last name, or at least hyphenate it if it's not too pretty. A little tradition here and there is a good thing. If I married a woman, however, I think I might be more inclined to save my last name... but I might change it if the mood strikes.
10/01/2010
Contributor: onehotmomma onehotmomma
I'm not married, and boy it's annoying. My kids don't have the same last name as me, and either I get called by my bf's last name whenever places call, or if someone is filling something out (like COmcast for instance for billing) They'll put my last name wrong. Travelling is a freakin nightmare, they always want extra paperwork. Bleh. Too much hassle. Then when whomever notices the last name difference we get the "why aren't you married yet?" question. I hate that most of all.

So when we do get married. I will def. change my name.
10/01/2010
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
When I marry my partner I plan to take his name. It's funny though because the last part of his name is the first part of my name so I joke that I'm only taking half of it lol.

Professionally I will still use my maiden name I think...I tink
10/01/2010