The New Intimacy

Naked Reader Book Club Discussion: The Power of WOW A Guide to Unleashing the Confident, Sexy You by Lori Bryant-Woolridge (November 8, 8-10 PM EST)

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Contributor: Brendada Brendada
Quote:
Originally posted by wrmbreze
I remember gaining a lot of weight when I went off to college. When I came home for a visit about a year later one of my guy friends said that I was cute before but was really hot not that I was "thick". That made me feel very sexy.
and he is thick in the head- clueless or maybe he read those creepy "how to pick up chicks" by some idiot named "Mystery" which says the first steps is to insult attractive women to knock them down a peg, confidence-wise.

Lori -how do women handle cruds like "Mystery?"
11/08/2011
Contributor: Willow Wand Willow Wand
Quote:
Originally posted by aliceinthehole
speaking of staying sexually conscious... may be it's extreme but a clitoral hood piercing did that for me!

esp. when you're wearing pants with no panties...
I NEVER wear panties, can;t stand em. As far as the piercing, hubby HATES them, says it looks like a car wreck....it doesn't matter where it is located. I had my tongue pierced for his pleasure...nope, he didn't like it.
11/08/2011
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by Antipova
Aww, Thank you so much!

Probably going to spend it on some Signature Skivvies, as recommended by Power of Wow! Because I'm desperately trying to learn how to dress myself right now, anyway.
p.s. congrats on CotM! well-deserved, i must say.
11/08/2011
Contributor: LambChop LambChop
I've got to hop out, but it's been great!
11/08/2011
Contributor: Brendada Brendada
Quote:
Originally posted by Sammi
I think another one is Queen Latifah. She's beautiful and confident, and incredibly sexy.
She is gorgeous and Queen Latifah is getting her own TV show!
11/08/2011
Contributor: LoveDove LoveDove
Quote:
Originally posted by aliceinthehole
speaking of staying sexually conscious... may be it's extreme but a clitoral hood piercing did that for me!

esp. when you're wearing pants with no panties...
I've kind of wanted one. But I hated the actual piercing part of getting my EARS pierced, so I don't think that I'd handle getting my clit pierced well.
11/08/2011
Contributor: Lori Bryant Woolridge Lori Bryant Woolridge
Quote:
Originally posted by Antipova
So, gently off topic..:

I'm one of those people who has a really hard time accepting compliments. I'm able to see, appreciate, and mention good qualities in others, but it's hard for me not to analyze the motives of anyone ... more
First, begin to GIVE compliments. Honest and true. Make other people smile. Gift them with the knowledge of what makes their unique brand of sexy work. The more comfortable you are giving compliments, the more you'll be able to eventually accept them.

Next, realize that everyone who compliments you is giving you a gift. When people give you a tangible gift, I don't think you push it aside with distain or disbelief. Every time someone compliments you, they are telling you point blank what is special about you. Listen and learn. Highlight those areas. Where those colors, show those legs. Smile more, whatever they tell you. You will see that this only creates more compliments and once your ears are available the hear them you will start listening.

Also, look in the mirror and find your most attractive features, compliment yourself nightly. Cut your nagging voice off when it tries to tell your differently. You are what you believe you are. And you have the power to change your beliefs.
11/08/2011
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
Quote:
Originally posted by LambChop
I've got to hop out, but it's been great!
Thank you for joining us! See you again in a couple of weeks hopefully!
11/08/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
Quote:
Originally posted by aliceinthehole
let me very seductively mention that i could come help you learn how...

Seduction accepted---I am all ears!
11/08/2011
Contributor: Sacchi Sacchi
On the subject of accepting compliments, it might help to consider how someone who's worked up the courage to compliment you might feel when their efforts are rejected. Lori makes a big point of considering the feelings of people who interact with you.
11/08/2011
Contributor: Brendada Brendada
Quote:
Originally posted by Top Kat
Thanks! Lizbet makes me want to put my nose ring back in. Looking forward to seeing the movie!
you must wear your nose ring to the movies!
11/08/2011
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by LambChop
I've got to hop out, but it's been great!
thanks for hanging out!
11/08/2011
Contributor: Ryuson Ryuson
(Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by Willow Wand
Nope, no "want" to masturbate. I do it to get me going if hubby is DYING, but other than that, meh. I've tried the Ben Wa balls, they did NOTHING. They kinda got sucked up to the back of my vaginal cavity and didn't move.....I dunno
I didn't want to at first either, but I made myself do it every day in the shower. It really did help, but I can't say for sure that it will work for you. It would be at least worth a try in my opinion. Also, which Ben Wa balls did you try? Some seem to be better than others!
11/08/2011
Contributor: wrmbreze wrmbreze
Quote:
Originally posted by Brendada
and he is thick in the head- clueless or maybe he read those creepy "how to pick up chicks" by some idiot named "Mystery" which says the first steps is to insult attractive women to knock them down a peg, ... more
No he meant it as a compliment because I was really skinny before. After I wrote this I fixed where it should have said now that I was "think" He said I looked healthier with more weight on me. Heck with my first kid, the doc told me I was underweight at 120lbs..
11/08/2011
Contributor: Discreet Lover Discreet Lover
Quote:
Originally posted by LambChop
I've got to hop out, but it's been great!
Thanks for stopping by!
11/08/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
Quote:
Originally posted by aliceinthehole
p.s. congrats on CotM! well-deserved, i must say.
Thanks, Alice! You're such a delight & super sweet!
11/08/2011
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by Antipova
Seduction accepted---I am all ears!
haha... i'm a tease.
11/08/2011
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by Sacchi
On the subject of accepting compliments, it might help to consider how someone who's worked up the courage to compliment you might feel when their efforts are rejected. Lori makes a big point of considering the feelings of people who interact ... more
yes! this is a great point.

come to think of it, sacchi, you've made nothing BUT great points all night. how come i've never seen you around EF before? where you been hidin'?

i'ma gonna go follow you just so i can know in the future!
11/08/2011
Contributor: wrmbreze wrmbreze
Quote:
Originally posted by wrmbreze
No he meant it as a compliment because I was really skinny before. After I wrote this I fixed where it should have said now that I was "think" He said I looked healthier with more weight on me. Heck with my first kid, the doc told me I was ... more
I simply cannot type tonight. I don't know whats wrong with me.
11/08/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
Quote:
Originally posted by Lori Bryant Woolridge
First, begin to GIVE compliments. Honest and true. Make other people smile. Gift them with the knowledge of what makes their unique brand of sexy work. The more comfortable you are giving compliments, the more you'll be able to eventually ... more
Gonna take some practice... but I am trying!
11/08/2011
Contributor: Brendada Brendada
Quote:
Originally posted by wrmbreze
No he meant it as a compliment because I was really skinny before. After I wrote this I fixed where it should have said now that I was "think" He said I looked healthier with more weight on me. Heck with my first kid, the doc told me I was ... more
ok, I will stop hating on him...
11/08/2011
Contributor: Willow Wand Willow Wand
Quote:
Originally posted by Ryuson
I didn't want to at first either, but I made myself do it every day in the shower. It really did help, but I can't say for sure that it will work for you. It would be at least worth a try in my opinion. Also, which Ben Wa balls did you try? ... more
I got the ones from Eden, they were glass with red hearts inside. I have also tried to force myself to masturbate every day. 21 days makes a habit I was told, so I did it for 30 days. Didn't work...I'm not into masturbation. I'm not into sex. Lesbian porn on the other hand, I could watch that ALL DAY LONG and I could get off. I feel bad about that though, cause I think it hurts hubby's feelings....
11/08/2011
Contributor: Brendada Brendada
Quote:
Originally posted by Sacchi
On the subject of accepting compliments, it might help to consider how someone who's worked up the courage to compliment you might feel when their efforts are rejected. Lori makes a big point of considering the feelings of people who interact ... more
a great point. Giving a compliment just FEELS so good, too
11/08/2011
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
Quote:
Originally posted by Sacchi
On the subject of accepting compliments, it might help to consider how someone who's worked up the courage to compliment you might feel when their efforts are rejected. Lori makes a big point of considering the feelings of people who interact ... more
I never thought of it that way. Both you and Lori make excellent points. I'm notorious for shooting down compliments. I don't mean to, but it's a bad habit. I'm going to have to break that.
11/08/2011
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by Willow Wand
I got the ones from Eden, they were glass with red hearts inside. I have also tried to force myself to masturbate every day. 21 days makes a habit I was told, so I did it for 30 days. Didn't work...I'm not into masturbation. I'm not into ... more
sweetheart! were we separated at birth!?

lol.


i only like lesbian porn! if you ask me it has to do with past trauma as well. men are seen as violent, and without a doubt appear to be raping women in porn.

and women are so gentle to eachother. and much gentler on the eyes too... EW penises.
11/08/2011
Contributor: Sacchi Sacchi
There's nothing wrong with fantasizing during sex, too, but first you have to figure out what you like to fantasize about. Certain scenes in movies--in erotic books--or you might even fantasize about being someone you think is sexy. That doesn't mean you don't try most of the time to be your own real self, but it's sometimes a good tool to get you where you need to be at a particular moment.
11/08/2011
Contributor: LoveDove LoveDove
Quote:
Originally posted by Willow Wand
I got the ones from Eden, they were glass with red hearts inside. I have also tried to force myself to masturbate every day. 21 days makes a habit I was told, so I did it for 30 days. Didn't work...I'm not into masturbation. I'm not into ... more
Well, if it works for you, why stop it? If it makes you feel sexy and makes you get off, I'd say go for it. (But that's just me.)
11/08/2011
Contributor: Lori Bryant Woolridge Lori Bryant Woolridge
Quote:
Originally posted by Willow Wand
Currently I am 156. I am doing the HCG diet and lost 20lbs so far. I want to be 125-130 though. I have had 6 kids and all my weight is in my belly, so even if I wear sexy clothing, my gut hangs all over it...yuck
So what's sexy clothing? If you don't feel comfortable and beautiful in it, then it isn't sexy. See, it's all about your own brand of sexy. Find clothing that helps hid the less than, and accentuates the better than, and start leading from a place of happy to be me instead of being apologetic about. Trust me, your husband knows all about your gut and he still wants to have sex with you. We worry far to much about our perceived flaws. One question, is your husband a Greek God? Is he in perfect form? Probably not, but you love him and don't really dwell on his. Love yourself as much as you love others in your life.
11/08/2011
Contributor: wrmbreze wrmbreze
Quote:
Originally posted by aliceinthehole
sweetheart! were we separated at birth!?

lol.


i only like lesbian porn! if you ask me it has to do with past trauma as well. men are seen as violent, and without a doubt appear to be raping women in porn.

and women are so ... more
My hubby would love it if I only watched lesbian porn. He says women are sexy, but men are just gross.
11/08/2011
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by Willow Wand
I got the ones from Eden, they were glass with red hearts inside. I have also tried to force myself to masturbate every day. 21 days makes a habit I was told, so I did it for 30 days. Didn't work...I'm not into masturbation. I'm not into ... more
also, you should def. talk to him about it. maybe it doesn't hurt his feelings?

my boy got into this 3some fantasy, and he'll have me tell him about my adventures with women to get off. most men like the idea of girls with other girls... so maybe he'll find it sexy that you're into that, strictly as a fantasy of course. or maybe even further, who knows.

it never hurts to ask.
11/08/2011