I would be irritated and annoyed at the not telling. The rest seems fairly innocent.
If your SO went skinny-dipping with another person of the opposite sex, would you be ok with it?
05/20/2013
I'd be very upset.
06/06/2013
I would be SO PISSED!
06/06/2013
I would be furious. Absolutely furious. At the friends AND him.
If it wasn't a big deal, why couldn't he tell you about it? Why did you have to hear about it from the friend? If it was no big deal, he should have been able to tell you about it no problem.
And no, alcohol is NOT an excuse. If alcohol comes out and the rules are "anything can happen" then that just says that he can't control his intake. Which means he can't be trusted with alcohol OR around those friends.
If it wasn't a big deal, why couldn't he tell you about it? Why did you have to hear about it from the friend? If it was no big deal, he should have been able to tell you about it no problem.
And no, alcohol is NOT an excuse. If alcohol comes out and the rules are "anything can happen" then that just says that he can't control his intake. Which means he can't be trusted with alcohol OR around those friends.
06/09/2013
Quote:
I'd be angry and probably dump him eventually due to trust issues.
Originally posted by
(k)InkyIvy
A few weeks ago, I was working a long shift (48 hours) away from home. Usually on weekends, my partner and I hang out with friends, so I wasn't surprised when he said a few friends were coming over.
I jokingly told him not to do anything ... more
I jokingly told him not to do anything ... more
A few weeks ago, I was working a long shift (48 hours) away from home. Usually on weekends, my partner and I hang out with friends, so I wasn't surprised when he said a few friends were coming over.
I jokingly told him not to do anything stupid.
The day I got home from my long shift, I hung out with a friend of mine. She and I were just sitting around, chatting, when she mentioned that she'd been one of the people that came to hang out at the house while I was working.
Not a big deal.
At least, not until she told me that they (she, my partner, and 2- single- male friends) had gotten really drunk and gone skinny-dipping. Oh, and that night was during the full moon, so it was pretty light out too.
*sigh*
So, here's the breakdown:
a) my partner didn't tell me that they'd gotten drunk
b) he didn't tell me that they'd gone skinny-dipping
c) he went skinny-dipping with a single woman (and two single males), who were probably acting flirty/risque because they were single.
d) I'd been telling him all summer that I've never gone skinny-dipping before and wanted to do that this summer.
I confronted him, and he didn't think it was that big of a deal...
How would you feel? What would you do? less
I jokingly told him not to do anything stupid.
The day I got home from my long shift, I hung out with a friend of mine. She and I were just sitting around, chatting, when she mentioned that she'd been one of the people that came to hang out at the house while I was working.
Not a big deal.
At least, not until she told me that they (she, my partner, and 2- single- male friends) had gotten really drunk and gone skinny-dipping. Oh, and that night was during the full moon, so it was pretty light out too.
*sigh*
So, here's the breakdown:
a) my partner didn't tell me that they'd gotten drunk
b) he didn't tell me that they'd gone skinny-dipping
c) he went skinny-dipping with a single woman (and two single males), who were probably acting flirty/risque because they were single.
d) I'd been telling him all summer that I've never gone skinny-dipping before and wanted to do that this summer.
I confronted him, and he didn't think it was that big of a deal...
How would you feel? What would you do? less
06/11/2013
If a boundry had been crossed that's one thing. If it were him and her alone...another story. But I know alot of girls try to be "one of the guys" in these situations-give him the benefit of a doubt before grabbing the pitchfork.
06/11/2013
Definitely not....simple boundaries like no nudity with other people should be easy to follow.
06/12/2013
Quote:
I'd be annoyed because he knew that you wanted to go and didn't bring me, were I you. I wouldn't care otherwise who he went skinny dipping with. Nudity is no big deal to me, and I don't care about flirtation. I believe that my partner has enough rational thought that he's not going to go animal kingdom and screw some other chick just because she's naked (or a guy, were he into that). But if he did something without me that he knew that I wanted to do when he could have easily done it with me instead, I'd be hurt.
Originally posted by
(k)InkyIvy
A few weeks ago, I was working a long shift (48 hours) away from home. Usually on weekends, my partner and I hang out with friends, so I wasn't surprised when he said a few friends were coming over.
I jokingly told him not to do anything ... more
I jokingly told him not to do anything ... more
A few weeks ago, I was working a long shift (48 hours) away from home. Usually on weekends, my partner and I hang out with friends, so I wasn't surprised when he said a few friends were coming over.
I jokingly told him not to do anything stupid.
The day I got home from my long shift, I hung out with a friend of mine. She and I were just sitting around, chatting, when she mentioned that she'd been one of the people that came to hang out at the house while I was working.
Not a big deal.
At least, not until she told me that they (she, my partner, and 2- single- male friends) had gotten really drunk and gone skinny-dipping. Oh, and that night was during the full moon, so it was pretty light out too.
*sigh*
So, here's the breakdown:
a) my partner didn't tell me that they'd gotten drunk
b) he didn't tell me that they'd gone skinny-dipping
c) he went skinny-dipping with a single woman (and two single males), who were probably acting flirty/risque because they were single.
d) I'd been telling him all summer that I've never gone skinny-dipping before and wanted to do that this summer.
I confronted him, and he didn't think it was that big of a deal...
How would you feel? What would you do? less
I jokingly told him not to do anything stupid.
The day I got home from my long shift, I hung out with a friend of mine. She and I were just sitting around, chatting, when she mentioned that she'd been one of the people that came to hang out at the house while I was working.
Not a big deal.
At least, not until she told me that they (she, my partner, and 2- single- male friends) had gotten really drunk and gone skinny-dipping. Oh, and that night was during the full moon, so it was pretty light out too.
*sigh*
So, here's the breakdown:
a) my partner didn't tell me that they'd gotten drunk
b) he didn't tell me that they'd gone skinny-dipping
c) he went skinny-dipping with a single woman (and two single males), who were probably acting flirty/risque because they were single.
d) I'd been telling him all summer that I've never gone skinny-dipping before and wanted to do that this summer.
I confronted him, and he didn't think it was that big of a deal...
How would you feel? What would you do? less
If it's normal in your relationship that you tell one another everything, then I'd also wonder why he hid it from you (though to be fair, based on your reaction, I'd probably have hidden it as well - I wouldn't want to piss my partner off over something insignificant). If my partner kept something like that from me, I'd be suspicious. Since he doesn't keep shit like that from me, since I think it's all in good fun, I would wonder why this time, he'd felt the need to.
06/12/2013
I'd be pissed for several reasons.
A. You have been expressing interest in skinny dipping which has not been fulfilled.
B. With her being single she shouldn't have been there with out you there.
C. You had to learn it from HER.
The drinking really shouldn't be an issue. They just need to think that she could be the type to do something stupid while being drunk, once she sobered up might try to turn it around on them. The guys should really think before they drink. But ya, you have a right to be pissed.
A. You have been expressing interest in skinny dipping which has not been fulfilled.
B. With her being single she shouldn't have been there with out you there.
C. You had to learn it from HER.
The drinking really shouldn't be an issue. They just need to think that she could be the type to do something stupid while being drunk, once she sobered up might try to turn it around on them. The guys should really think before they drink. But ya, you have a right to be pissed.
06/12/2013
I would flip out & make a big deal of it...
06/12/2013
I would be mad that he didn't tell me after. I don't think the single woman thing was so bad, there was also two other guys so I don't even think it could have gotten away with anything and plus they were friends.
06/12/2013
i am SO not a jealous person. it would turn me on to know my wife got out of her shell and got naked in front of another man.
06/12/2013
Totally within your right to be pissed. Not a jealous person but drunk and naked is how ill $h!t goes down.
06/12/2013
The hiding it/lying by omission would be what bothered me. If he is hiding that it makes you wonder what else he might be hiding. Hiding things and/or lying cuts down the trust that is so important for a couple to have. When I was calm, I would try to explain that to him. In a relationship where you are apart for several days at a time, trust is critical. Men are sometimes clueless when it comes to how women view/feel about situations.
06/18/2013
Wow this thread has been floating around since 2012. Was there any update on the relationship and how everything played out. I tried to read through the thread but did not see it.
06/18/2013
I would be a little bothered, but not too bothered. I'd be bothered he did it drunk, and I'd be bothered he didn't tell me about it first. But other than that, it wouldn't get to me too much. Especially since there were other guys there. If it were just him and the girl, however, I'd be really upset if he hadn't told me before hand.
06/22/2013