I think the best policy is just to ask, if the setting is appropriate to do so. When I was reviewing Live Sex Show I emailed Courtney Trouble to ask her about the performers' preference and found out that people who identify as genderqueer prefer the pronoun 'they'. It threw my traditional English training for a loop, but I tried to make it work. less

Yeah, that's one thing that must be really tricky for the people in that situation.

On the one hand---I totally understand why it's important to be able to choose pronouns that fit who you are!

On the other hand, I'm an old-fashioned pedant (I don't say that proudly, it's just kind of... the way I am.) and when I'm the chair of a committee I make people call me "Chairman Antipova," because even though I have a vagina and am a girl, I think the words "chairwoman" and "chairperson" sound awkward and ugly. Same thing with humankind---in my mind, our language has evolved so that when I say "mankind" you know I mean "men, women, and children," because the word "humankind" is cumbersome and I don't like it.

So, it's totally just a personal preference when I'm reading. If I were to meet people who went by atypical pronouns, I would call them by what they identified with. Same as I call people who prefer to be addressed as "Chairwoman" "Chairwoman." But if I'm reading a story, I'd rather stick to pronouns that are easy to pronounce in my brain.


Did anybody else get distracted by the pronouns in those stories?

Or am I a pedantic brat? I feel kind of bad for not whole-hog siding with people making a political stand. less

Lol. I found more emotion in the excerpt than the Twilight books.

Gender in itself can be blurred. I play with my gender all the time. There are some days where I will feel very dysphoric and feel the need to "switch" genders but most of the time I can flip flop when I want less

Thanks, Kat, for providing the perfect time for this. Giselle Renarde (who has a story or two in my upcoming anthology Girl Fever) told me this about writing "The Therapist and the Whore":


"The inclusion of my story "The Therapist and the Whore" in Take Me There was one of my greatest honours of 2011. When Tristan got in touch with me about submitting a story, I had just emailed "The Therapist and the Whore" to Rachel Kramer Bussel, who also has a story in this collection, for an anthology she was editing. I pretty much never pull a submission, because the last thing I want to do is waste an editor's time, but I had a gut feeling this story belonged in Take Me There. Luckily, Tristan and Cleis agreed. (Sorry again, Rachel!)

I'm over the moon every time I read another glowing review of Take Me There, not just because the book is well-received, but because it's so visible. I started writing trans and genderqueer stories when my girlfriend, who is trans, told me she'd never read any erotic fiction about trans people that appealed to her. In fact, she said everything she'd ever read really turned her off. She wanted relatable, well-rounded characters, not glorified fetish objects. So I got to work. Since then I've produced a lot of trans fiction, but it's a niche market. Even when my own trans erotica anthology "My Mistress' Thighs" won an honourable mention in the 2011 Rainbow Awards, sales still just bumbled along. I think a lot of readers conceptualize trans erotica as something weird and "not for me." Take Me There is really breaking down that wall. I'm so delighted people are reading Take Me There--trans people, cis people, queer people, all people. It deserves the visibility it's earned.

Thanks!"
Giselle less

"relatable, well-rounded characters, not glorified fetish objects."

THIS IS EXACTLY WHY TAKE ME THERE WAS PERFECT.

(Also, I love the Therapist and the Whore to pieces. That's one of my favorite fantasy dynamics, so it was so easy to get wrapped up on.) less

That's only when i'm on my A game. When I was a journalism major, I would often call my advisor's baby "it" mostly out of fear. Since my niece was born, I've learned to become more sensitive to the parents feelings, I suppose. Some don't care but there are plenty that will jump down your throat if you get it wrong, lol. less

Yes I totally agree. I do what I do because it makes me happy and that is just how my mind works. A lot of people do not experiment with their gender because society has deemed it "bad". Everyone believes that it is wrong. But in reality it is a very natural thing less

Aw yeah! I had forgotten about that one but it was very excellent... she spent a lot of thought on how to tell her coworker about her anatomy? I thought that was a really good choice to have early in the book, it kind of warmed me up to how difficult coming fully out might be. less

That's only when i'm on my A game. When I was a journalism major, I would often call my advisor's baby "it" mostly out of fear. Since my niece was born, I've learned to become more sensitive to the parents feelings, I suppose. Some don't care but there are plenty that will jump down your throat if you get it wrong, lol. less