As in their number of lovers they've had?
Do you think knowing your lovers "Number" is important?
06/02/2011
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No, I don't think it matters because it is all in the past, and there is nothing that can be done to change it now.
06/03/2011
I don't think the number matters either. (Unless it's really, really high because that could mean more risk of STDs. But even so, you get tested and move on with your life.)
06/03/2011
I say yes sometimes. I would just ask "is it more than you can count on one hand" and if they say yes then I would really suggest they get tested for STD's. Actually, either way they should. But as far as asking so I can know what I'm up against would be ridiculous. My fiance lost his entire virginity to me so I don't really need to ask but he asked me for the very same reasons I just listed.
06/03/2011
I think it's important just to know, personally because I appreciate being open and honest and I prefer partners who have approximately the same amount of experience as me. If my partner has slept with 40 people and I've been with one, it will surely have an affect on our dynamic and how he comes into the relationship comparatively. I just think it's important to talk about.
06/03/2011
It's not something that is important to me. I might ask out of curiosity, but in the end it really doesn't matter either way. Sometimes it's best not to know. If he's been with 20 and ive been with 1...I'm bound to feel more awkward when he have sex than if I didn't know the number.
06/03/2011
No. Should you talk about their experiences and yours and your std test results? Yes. But is the exact number either of you have had important? No. They had a life before you and should the time arise, they'll have a life after you. You have to accept that and not get hung up on something that has nothing to do with you and that isn't a big deal.
06/03/2011
For me its important for me sex is fun and exciting but its also something I don't share with everyone and for me knowing if there have been a lot of partners in the past gives me a clue to how they might view sex and my relative risk of stds( even tho i will require testing before hand no matter the number)
06/03/2011
It doesn't matter to me. When My Man and I got together, "testing" when you met someone wasn't common. I was tested for STDs every year during my PAP test, so it's been OK. He's been with a lot more women than I have been with men, but I don't care to know the number, as it doesn't matter.
I'd have anything he has by now (we're fluid bonded) and we have nothing, (with the exception of passing a yeast infection back and forth for months at at time) so I guess it's all OK.
You can have sex with 20 people and be completely STD free, you could have sex with one person once and get 15 diseases. The number may increase the "chance" but it isn't really predictive.
I'd have anything he has by now (we're fluid bonded) and we have nothing, (with the exception of passing a yeast infection back and forth for months at at time) so I guess it's all OK.
You can have sex with 20 people and be completely STD free, you could have sex with one person once and get 15 diseases. The number may increase the "chance" but it isn't really predictive.
06/03/2011
Not at all and I would rather not know. I simply don't care how many they have been with and actually think it would somewhat turn me off them to know just how many they have had - especially if they have had a LOT.
Like the saying goes .... "What ya don't know won't hurt ya"!
Like the saying goes .... "What ya don't know won't hurt ya"!
08/07/2011
You know, I used to think it mattered. And what I've come to realize is that it doesn't at all. Just being honest and loving is the important part.
01/17/2012
I prefer to just know about the std status and any unprotected partners.
01/17/2012
But I do also know my partners number and she knows mine.
01/17/2012
I say yes, because I want to know. I think it is important to know how many people my partner has been with, since I am sleeping with this many people as well. I want to know if they have been test for STD's as well.
01/17/2012
I don't like placing and emphasis on how many partners my partner has had. I don't want anyone to feel insecure about their numbers and what not. I do understand the want to know for STD statuses and what not.
01/22/2012
don't think it matters
01/23/2012
I don't think it matters but I still want to know.
01/23/2012
Quote:
I guess it just depends. I wouldn't want to be with someone who is known to have been around, it would just worry me unless they got tested first.
Originally posted by
TexasBrat
As in their number of lovers they've had?
01/23/2012
no it dont
01/23/2012
No, but it is interesting. I love the "trading sexual history" conversation, assuming it's in a sexy, non-judgmental tone
01/23/2012
Would I be curious? Yes. Do i think it important? No. STD status that is the important one.
01/23/2012
I don't have to know the integer, but I want to know the Boolean value.
01/24/2012
Not the specific number, no, but the ball park yes.
01/24/2012
Quote:
It isn't that important
Originally posted by
TexasBrat
As in their number of lovers they've had?
01/25/2012
It is important, but its not. It is not important to know right away, but in the course of a relationship you and your partner should be able to talk about these things. So as time goes on, and you open up, you can have the discussions.
01/27/2012
I honestly don't know how I feel about it. I like knowing, but it also makes me a little squeamish. I don't want to think about the 18 other girls my boyfriend has had sex with, but I'd rather know that there are 18 other girls. Not really sure why, but knowing how many sort of makes me feel better? I guess maybe 'cause I've had bad experiences with virgins or something.
01/27/2012
I think it's important in that I like to know everything about a partner. If they had been with some COMPLETELY ABSURD number of partners, like 100 or something, then that might take me by surprise and cause me to maybe reconsider, but I'd want to know more to have an idea of where they're coming from, and just to know one more thing about them than anything else.
04/09/2012
Quote:
Yes, sort of...
Originally posted by
TexasBrat
As in their number of lovers they've had?
04/09/2012
The number of lovers my boyfriend has had before me is a bit difficult to handle, as he was my first. (There's been a breakup, and then a second, but, here I am, back with the first.) I'd honestly rather not know about the others, but, what with facebook, and having been his first relationship in 4 years, he's facebook friends with exes. So I actually get to SEE them. That's just agonizing, since unfortunately, I'm an insecure, jealous person, despite the fact that he gives me no reason to be. There's no reason it should matter though. I think the most important thing is that you both get tested before you start things, for safety. After all, it only takes sex with one partner to catch an STD. And that's my post 4:30am-Tom Waits-playing-in-the-b ackground rambling for the morning/night.
04/09/2012
its important to me just because my bf and i share everything
04/09/2012
Total posts: 33
Unique posters: 32
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