The New Intimacy

Can we have some honest answers?

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Contributor: Butterfly Princess Butterfly Princess
Quote:
Originally posted by GeekWife
With a rambunctious toddler and a hubby with a job that sometimes occupies his attention (either at the office or at home) upwards of 70 hours a week, we're lucky if we do it once every two weeks. If we get it more than once in a week's time, ... more
I completely know how you feel!
My suggestion from one mommy to another:
MAKE "ME" time and "US" time happen!

I usually try to use the time when my children sleep (either for a nap or at night) as "me" time and "us" time.
It doesn't always work out but at least a couple times a week get some time to relax and let yourself be YOU. And then have time to reconnect with your husband.

I have found putting the kids down to bed at 8pm is great, then we have an hour or two to be together uninterrupted.

I hope this helps!
And just hang in there; it will get better! I promise! (I have a 5 year old and 3 year old; it is so much easier with the 5 year old! It will get better!!!)

Oh and remember - it's not the quantity, it's the quality!
03/16/2012
Contributor: pootpootpoot pootpootpoot
I never turn it down. It would be every night if my partner and I lived together.
04/24/2012
Contributor: Khanner Khanner
I've never been too tired for sex, and I've never turned my boyfriend down.
04/24/2012
Contributor: extrafun extrafun
If my wife would I would have sex everyday. But I know that like many she is to tired during the week. Having said this I will take matters into my own hands on a very regular occasion
04/24/2012
Contributor: pasdechat pasdechat
Even if I'm not tired, there are plenty of days when I don't feel like having sex. It's rare that I don't masturbate, though, if I have any free time during the day at all.
04/24/2012
Contributor: xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
I have a daughter who is about to be 1 years old so of course I don't have sex every night like I used to. Lol. Taking care of a baby all day is exhausting. Sometimes I just wanna cuddle up with my hubby n sleep. Lol. Nothing wrong with that.
04/24/2012
Contributor: Bex1331 Bex1331
I would never turn down sex, but my bf does, who knows, if he wanted it every day maybe I would start turning him down sometimes, but right now I'd have to say every day would be awesome
04/24/2012
Contributor: badk1tty badk1tty
We go for months without having sex, as he's in the military and is usually elsewhere for months on end, so when he -is- home, it's usually every day. On occasion when he's home for a few months at a stretch, we'll slow it down, but we're typically 5+ times a week when together.
04/27/2012
Contributor: xilliannax xilliannax
Quote:
Originally posted by Rossie
Sometimes when I come across similar threads, a lot of EFers claim they have sex every single day, what about you? There are times when I'm too exhausted from chores, and I want nothing to do with sex, am I the only one? I'm going to keep ... more
I kinda covered this in a previous thread but some times because of two kids and a career constantly on the road sex every day is difficult. Yes, my husband have sex EVERY night both children are asleep before 9pm, when we're in our own bed, and I'm not pissed at him.
05/02/2012
Contributor: Llahsram Llahsram
Maybe three times a week
05/02/2012
Contributor: Mwar Mwar
I'm usually up for it unless I'm sick or dead tired (or if I have a lot going on). I hardly turn him down.
05/02/2012
Contributor: MistressDandelion MistressDandelion
I'd do it even if I'm tired, but if he's tired he won't
05/08/2012
Contributor: breebree breebree
no...not all everyday
05/08/2012
Contributor: Chami Chami
i always want it but some nights i pass out before i get it but i wouldn't say no and i have told him before i would love for him to wake me up with sex
05/09/2012
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by Rossie
Sometimes when I come across similar threads, a lot of EFers claim they have sex every single day, what about you? There are times when I'm too exhausted from chores, and I want nothing to do with sex, am I the only one? I'm going to keep ... more
I rarely turn down sex, but no, having sex every single day is not even realistic for us. We often will have extra time some weeks, like this week, and will get 3-4 days of sex in, but it's rare. I don't see how anybody could have sex every day and have a life, job, children, family, school, house to take care of, etc. It would be really hard. I don't always want to have sex and there's nothing wrong with that. Some days, like you said, I'm exhausted or ill or feeling bad. Or maybe I'm simply not in the mood because we just did it the night before, but that doesn't mean you don't love the sex. I couldn't think of one single thing I don't love about ours, but doing it everyday is not realistic or something I want to do everyday.
05/22/2012
Contributor: 31 Flavors 31 Flavors
There was once when I was too tired. Once.
06/05/2012
Contributor: gsfanatic gsfanatic
I've usually been persuadable, but there are a couple times where we've skipped out and taken a break
06/05/2012
Contributor: sweetiejo sweetiejo
Me and my guy have a great deal, I'm a bit addicted to sex while he is the opposite. So to meet in the middle we try to about every other day, but now that we are both working a huge amount of hours and aren't always able to see one another its usually whenever we see one another.
06/05/2012
Contributor: quackbuster quackbuster
When I was in a relationship, we had sex almost every night, but there were a few times we'd skip.

Now that I'm single, I masturbate at least 1-3x most days...I guess my sex drive went up now that I'm alone, lol.
06/05/2012
Contributor: Short Cake Short Cake
Everyday, even being tired when i get excited i seem to be wide awake!
06/12/2012
Contributor: hyacinthgirl hyacinthgirl
I've only told my partner "later" instead of "no", because sometimes I need to recharge and rest before another round. Then again, we only see each other once a month, and usually have sex between three and five times a day for the two days we're together. After four vigorous sessions, sometimes I just need to sleep for an hour or two.

The rest of the month, I masturbate maybe two or three times. I don't get the urge very often - I'm apparently a sex camel.
06/20/2012
Contributor: giftdgecko giftdgecko
As a guy there are very few times I will say no
06/21/2012
Contributor: sexykiss sexykiss
when me and imy gf first started dating we had sex for like hours on end like 5 hrs at a time everyday now we have been together for 4 years dont have sex that much maybe like 2 a week! i miss the old days!
06/23/2012
Contributor: John E W John E W
I wish it was daily
Unfortunately it's about 3 times a month my girlfriend doesn't have a high sex drive!!
Anyone got any solutions??
06/23/2012
Contributor: Noelle Noelle
I've been married a year, and I want to have sex all the time, like 4-5 times a day. I'm lucky if I get it once a week. MY husband has a low libido. It SUCKS. I need to buy more toys I guess..
06/23/2012
Contributor: iluvPHSfh9 iluvPHSfh9
I'm single, but I consider myself a pretty horny girl and there are day were I will pass out right after hitting the bed, however other nights it puts me right to sleep, I also find that in the morning I like it too. Sometimes even just the middle of the day is nice.
06/23/2012
Contributor: A.noel A.noel
I have a high sex drive, but sometimes it is just too much effort to play with toys. I go through phases of using toys every day and then not using them for a week or so. So I chose Other
06/23/2012
Contributor: Girly Juice Girly Juice
I have a high-ish sex drive; there are times when I don't want sex, but they don't usually have to do with being tired - more often, I say no if I feel gross/unclean or if my vag is sore.

If my partner and I are tired, we'll usually just agree to have slow, lazy sex and go to sleep right after. We'd usually rather connect with each other than get a few extra minutes of sleep.
06/24/2012
Contributor: solitudinarian solitudinarian
I only recall turning him down once - I was so tired that I could barely keep my eyes open. I had thrush once, so it was no sex for about a week then. His drive isn't quite as high as mine (mine is pretty insane), but we usually manage once a day when we are together. If I had my way, it would probably be multiple times a day. But I'm happy to masturbate whenever I am horny and he isn't, so it works.

When I'm at my place, I usually masturbate every night as it makes falling asleep a lot easier. I don't need to have sex right before I sleep (we do it at other times during the day sometimes) as I find falling asleep next to him easy anyway.
06/25/2012
Contributor: Gone (LD29) Gone (LD29)
Apparently I have a really low sex drive, because we only have sex once every week or two by my choice. I just really need to be in the mood for it. I may masturbate more often than we have sex, but that's still only about once a week too.

I should add that I used to be on medication that completely killed my sex drive, to the point where I could go months wanting nothing to do with it. The fact that I want it on a weekly basis now feels like my sex drive has gone through the roof!
06/25/2012