What do you think is the largest factor that contributes to divorce?

Contributor: Mylo Mylo
I want to know what you personally think is the largest factor leading to divorce in today's society.
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Money Issues
12  (12%)
Selfishness
2  (2%)
Cheating
6  (6%)
Closing Down Communitcation
61  (62%)
Little to No Intimacy
2  (2%)
Little to No Romance (The little things that let you know they care.)
5  (5%)
Emotional Needs Not Met
8  (8%)
Physical Needs Not Met
Mental Abuse
1  (1%)
Physical Abuse
Abuse in General
2  (2%)
Total votes: 99
Poll is closed
11/29/2012
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Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I definitely think trouble begins when talking ends. If you aren't communicating then you can't solve the problems. I often find that when my husband and I are faced with an important issue that we end up growing closer together instead of further apart if we handle it well enough.
11/29/2012
Contributor: Falsepast Falsepast
My parents are divorcing, I can tell that EVERYTHING listed with the exception of physical abuse is causing the divorce.
11/29/2012
Contributor: PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
I think communication is the hugest factor. Once that starts going downhill, a lot of the other things listed go along with it.
11/29/2012
Contributor: Babylove09 Babylove09
Quote:
Originally posted by Mylo
I want to know what you personally think is the largest factor leading to divorce in today's society.
lack of communication is what would start the down fall of a relationship from what i think.
11/29/2012
Contributor: table38792 table38792
I think money is the central biggest reason. It contributes to the breakdown of communication too IMO.
11/29/2012
Contributor: Amber1319 Amber1319
All of them really but mainly money and communication.
11/29/2012
Contributor: no longer here no longer here
Communication. We also think it's a lack of effort on one or the other party. A lack of commitment and "stick-to-it-ive-ness" . Most of our friends who are getting divorced now really have the "why should I work at this when I can go out and find something better". It "usually" takes two to make a relationship fail.

Marriage is work...it's not always roses and chocolate...but it will be that way wherever.

Don't get us wrong...we understand this isn't an always...but unfortunately from what we've seen it's getting to be an often.
11/29/2012
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
All of those contributed to mine, minus the cheating and physical abuse. We really just weren't suited for each other.

The rest I've witnessed around me is due to either giant changes that can't be coped with (one is unable to have kids) or lack of commitment to the relationship. Money is one of the Big Fight Buttons, though.
11/29/2012
Contributor: Incendiaire Incendiaire
I think people rush into marriage too quickly, and give up too easily when things hit a rough patch, or don't live up to the idealised scenario they were expecting.
11/29/2012
Contributor: Leather & Lace Leather & Lace
Money issues.
11/29/2012
Contributor: G&L G&L
I believe people don't talk and I mean truly talk like they should.
11/29/2012
Contributor: RonLee RonLee
For me it was a combination of more than two of those factors as well as a few not listed. One alone probably wouldn't have been sufficient for me to have initiated divorce.
11/29/2012
Contributor: meitman meitman
I always believe communication is the most important thing in a marriage. Too many problems arise from poor communication.
11/29/2012
Contributor: Martiniman Martiniman
If you believe the experts, its money.
11/29/2012
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
As a once-divorced man you'd think I'd have an opinion - but I don't. Everyone's case is a unique set of unfortunate circumstances.
11/30/2012
Contributor: js250 js250
I would say it is communication breakdown, which causes emotional needs not to be met. It is actually a small but deadly domino effect of many things that relate to the smaller more-live withable issues. When the bigger issues start to topple, they take the small things you let go with them and turn them into large issues that are deal breakers as well.
11/30/2012
Contributor: wicked weasel wicked weasel
Cheating with money...
11/30/2012
Contributor: Kirill1171 Kirill1171
Closing Down Communitcation
11/30/2012
Contributor: Kitka Kitka
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
I definitely think trouble begins when talking ends. If you aren't communicating then you can't solve the problems. I often find that when my husband and I are faced with an important issue that we end up growing closer together instead of ... more
Exactly! We're pretty much the same, we always talk things out and try to work through big issues the best we can with each other and it ends up making us feel closer together after all is said and done.
11/30/2012
Contributor: Trysexual Trysexual
Communication, because it can help deal with all the other problems or prevent them.
11/30/2012
Contributor: - Kira - - Kira -
I believe the statistics say money. However, I think usually the problem is a lack of communication *about* the money. Yeah, tough times are stressful, but it's when you start going at each other about it that it leads to divorce.

Even if you look at the forums here and what people come asking advice on - it can almost always be answered with "communicate with your partner."

My mom and dad are divorced for everything on there minus cheating. Though of course my dad is a paranoid person, so he'd say she cheated even though she didn't. O.o
11/30/2012
Contributor: shorejen9 shorejen9
Quote:
Originally posted by no longer here
Communication. We also think it's a lack of effort on one or the other party. A lack of commitment and "stick-to-it-ive-ness" . Most of our friends who are getting divorced now really have the "why should I work at this when I can ... more
I completely agree. Marriage can be the single most meaningful relationship you have in life, other than kids but it requires work! The means communication has to go both ways and each party has to listen. Money is almost always a factor at one point or another and you can set goals and work on that aspect but only with communication and hardwork!
11/30/2012
Contributor: epiphanyjayne epiphanyjayne
people need to keep an open communication. also you need intimacy even if it's hard and you don't feel like it/ don't have time, make time force it and you'll feel it. I know we've had some dry spells due to kids and it would have been easy not to do it but we would decide to focus on each other and it would spark things up all over again. 10 years together talking here! and we still love each other and love having sex with each other.
11/30/2012
Contributor: Sunny Meadows Sunny Meadows
I think people dont know how to fight fair. They get mean and horrible to each other. Once that is out there you cant take it back. I also think what you say in the heat of the moment is somewhat the truth. if people learned to sit down communicate on a daily bases. learned to fight fair marriages would last a lot longer. Believe it or not that was a rule no fighting and we have had no fighting. we sit and talk. if we get mad we take a time out and then come back to it. I we can get through anything together and so far we have.
11/30/2012
Contributor: ginnyluvspotter ginnyluvspotter
Money issues have always been a big one for me
11/30/2012
Contributor: Supervixen Supervixen
I think when communication breaks down, it leads to the other problems such as money issues, affairs, lack of intimacy, needs not being met, etc.
11/30/2012
Contributor: Mrs.Tee Mrs.Tee
Quote:
Originally posted by Mylo
I want to know what you personally think is the largest factor leading to divorce in today's society.
Communication is the key to everything. When a person shuts down that can lead a person to stray away or cheat on their significant other.All the other issue could be very influential when it comes to the divorce rate but as long as their is open communication on both ends, I really dont think that a husband and wife cant get through it together.
11/30/2012
Contributor: Lavendar Lavendar
I think no communication, lack of intimacy, and emotional and physical needs not being met are all huge issues.
11/30/2012
Contributor: DomonCoshu DomonCoshu
Communication definitely.
11/30/2012