The New Intimacy

Do your partner's exes ever bother you? PRIVATE VOTING

Skip to last post
Set alerts
Updates
Forum search
Contributor: CSEA CSEA
Quote:
Originally posted by K101
Thank God my partner's ex girlfriend is not in his life. He doesn't associate with ex's and neither do I. I don't think it'd be very respectful and it wouldn't be a good situation, things just aren't the same after ... more
I am sorry for bastards lol and congrats on the good catch now !
06/18/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
For a while I did have a problem with an ex of his because it wasn't until she got a new boyfriend 5 or 6 months after he left her that she finally started acknowledging that they weren't together anymore. It really only bothered me when she was home for spring break and bumped into him and tried to convince him to get back together with her, even tho she was apparently casually dating the new guy at the same time. She doesn't bother me anymore, and he doesn't have a problem with any of my exes. We don't run into either of my exes anymore, but since all of us went to high school together and have a whole bunch of mutual friends, we all end up seeing each other from time to time and hearing about what the other is up to. If it comes up it comes up, but I don't ask about them at all.
06/18/2011
Contributor: Peggi Peggi
I am irritated by all but 3. One, I have never met and probably never will, and would love to do more than speak my mind. One I am getting close to, and I support her animal rescue for cats with physical disabilities, and the other is one of my closest friends now!!!

The one I'm closest to, he stayed friends with and the other we totally met on a support group with no clue who each other was until we talked about visiting each other to hang out...annnnd then we discovered her ex was my current lol.
10/07/2011
Contributor: onehotmomma onehotmomma
I checked multiple boxes lol My boyfriend and I met in the workplace, and before me he had dated another girl for 6 or 7 months, but this was before I knew him. She ended up working with us (small town) and we became friends. I was completely aware they had dated before, and been friends long before that, and it has no effect on me. We've driven across state to visit her numerous times, and she has come to visit us, we are all friends. Then there is my boyfriends only other serious girlfriend. The only reason she bugs me is because he'll go months or years without any mention of her, then she'll call, or write him a message on facebook and he'll be down in the dumps and I'll feel like he's second guessing his choice to be with me.
10/09/2011
Contributor: Sweet-Justice Sweet-Justice
I don't like her. I barely know her, and I've only met her once. But goodness I would beat her senseless if I ever got the chance. She's a horrible person.
10/09/2011
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
Ex girlfriends/boyfriends /wives/husbands always seem to be a pain in the ass for people. But on the other hand, it doesn't ever come up with some couples. I actually know two couples where the brother and the sister are dating their ... more
So nice being married ONCE, to the same person. No ex's, no drama, no nothing. Kid belong to US. All money belongs to us (well, not really...belongs to the COLLEGE for the kid).

MY oh MY...this old school life is SO easy compared to the blended, mixed up, shredded, torn, spaced and stressed out lives that so many of our friends and their poor kids have to go through.

It is why we still laugh about good friends of ours who had been married over 50 years, and from their first year on, he ALWAYS introduced her as "my first ex wife". She had a GREAT sense of humor about it too.
10/09/2011
Contributor: Beck Beck
OMG yes my husband was married once before. They have two kids together, she tries everything to ruin our lives. I am serious. I can not stand her.
10/10/2011
Contributor: Diabolical Kitty Diabolical Kitty
My fiance has one ex girlfriend, and she doesn't bother either of us anymore. She's jealous of me though.
10/10/2011
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Awkwardly enough, I LIVE with my girlfriend's ex-boyfriend. He's my roommate.

What makes it weirder? He was the one who brought up the idea of me moving into his house once I moved down here.

Yeah.....
10/16/2011
Contributor: Eliza Eliza
My SO and I went to high school together, so I know his exes on an acquaintance basis, but they're fine. They don't bother us. His college ex bugs me a bit because she still invites him out a lot, but they broke it off badly and he never goes.
10/16/2011
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
I seem to be the ex that new girlfriends worry about lol. Compliment, really. One in particular still has a problem with me. Why, I'll never know, but then again she is delusional still, even though she married the guy. I guess some people are very insecure no matter where they are in their relationship, even if their partner's exes don't want them back or are not trying to get them back. Sad. Those people need help. I prefer to not get consumed by past stuff. Move on.

But personally not for me. Regarding my current bf, there was an ex that did bother me because she was a meddler. She tried to suck up to his parents and get info about him and I that way. I hate girls like that. Get a fucking life. But that was two years ago (she still does stuff, but I don't think twice about it). It wasn't her specifically that bothered me, it's girls like her. Hope that makes sense. I just hate lame people.

In past relationships I don't remember having been intimidated or bothered by a partners ex. I also have never been in a situation like the ones you described in the beginning of this poll. I have dated my friend's exes (their permission of course), but never had a friend date one of mine or family member or anything. No one had kids or marriages or engagements. It's been kosher.
10/18/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
I, again, had a difficult time answering the poll. What do you mean by "comes around?" Like, she would show up at our house? Do people DO that?

I know who a few of My Man's exes are, but they NEVER EVER come around. Nor do any of mine. (By exes, I mean people we dated. Neither of us have been married before.) I would think, if one is serious about the relationship, unless you are in the same crowd of people, or related, allowing exes "coming around" would be a ridiculous thing to do.
10/18/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I'm not bothered by them and in fact we've recently been able to open up some serious dialogue about a few things I wasn't privy to in the past. It's made us more of a united front should they ever pop up again. One did send him a happy birthday text...it was water off a duck's back. She's hanging on, he isn't. So sad, too bad.
10/18/2011
Contributor: InNeedOfABuzzzz InNeedOfABuzzzz
He's met a couple of mine, in fact he was friends with my Ex-husband. Depending on the situation and how things ended (good vs. bad terms) depends on how he reacts. I personally don't mind it when we bump into his ex's or they are at a party and hang nearby and chat or whatever. They are ex's for a reason, they obviously weren't good enough to keep around so I don't let it bother me.

Although he has one psycho ex who feels the need to call and text how much she misses him all the time....she's a real pain in the tuckus!
10/18/2011
Contributor: arewehavingfun? arewehavingfun?
Quote:
Originally posted by Alan & Michele
It's been so long since either of our exes became our exes that I don't think any of us would care if we ran into each other again now.
I *did* have a boyfriend before Alan whose ex girlfriend keyed my car though, which turned out to be ... more
Good for him to have stood right up for you. Alot of men would get off on her jealousy.
10/18/2011
Contributor: arewehavingfun? arewehavingfun?
Quote:
Originally posted by K101
Thank God my partner's ex girlfriend is not in his life. He doesn't associate with ex's and neither do I. I don't think it'd be very respectful and it wouldn't be a good situation, things just aren't the same after ... more
A very mature post for such a young woman. Kudos to you.
10/18/2011
Contributor: arewehavingfun? arewehavingfun?
Quote:
Originally posted by Redboxbaby
We've been together so long that ex's would bother neither of us, even if they were around.
Isn't that a great place to be? I always say that when you don't care about where your ex is or what he/she is up to, then you know you are truley over him/her.
10/18/2011
Contributor: Princess-Kayla ♥ Princess-Kayla ♥
I've never met two of his exes, but I had to go to high school with one of them. We used to be friendly with each other, but after she found out we were dating, she would shoot me dirty looks all the time. Then at prom, she took pictures of us, which was creepy. In one of the pictures, her friend is behind us making gagging faces, which I find SUPER mature. Then at graduation, she was one of the people filming it, and she just kept staring at him in the audience.

I really didn't like her at all.
10/19/2011
Contributor: Nothere Nothere
I'm not in an relationship, but if I trust my partner implicitly, then there would be no problem for me. I'm not particularly jealous...
10/19/2011
Contributor: jessi2 jessi2
my fiance's ex (her only one) often tries to steal our friends. She inserts herself into our group in an attempt to get back with my partner. She is terribly jealous that I have a ring on my finger and that she is still very unlucky in love. But then again, she is still very young and immature. I try not to let it bother me, but my fiance is too nice to turn her away. We discussed it and she knows that it bothers me, so she makes an attempt to avoid her. I guess it all goes back to having open lines of communication. I know of couples who all date their friends and then their ex's ex, and it is a big cluster of dating that is endless.
10/20/2011
Contributor: TheSlyFox TheSlyFox
I used to get bothered by my Fiancee's ex's, but, he really doesn't talk to them much so i guess i don't have a reason to be bothered..
10/21/2011
Contributor: vanillaSpice vanillaSpice
Well, one of my partner's exes is also my ex, so that one only bothers me in the sense that he was a complete jerk. Her other ex I've never met, although he was apparently nice - just totally not compatible with her, even aside from the whole bit where she's a lesbian. I'd feel awkward meeting him.
10/22/2011
Contributor: freshbananas freshbananas
Took me way to long to realize what s/o meant lol
11/06/2011
Contributor: sweetcaroline sweetcaroline
"...two couples where the brother and the sister are dating their sibling's ex husband/wife..."
There's a brother and a sister, who are both dating each other's exes... which means that they are either both gay or there are transexuals int he picture? Whose kids??
Just saying, that is a VERY confusing statement.
11/09/2011
Contributor: sweetcaroline sweetcaroline
????????????????????
11/09/2011
Contributor: Undead Undead
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
Ex girlfriends/boyfriends /wives/husbands always seem to be a pain in the ass for people. But on the other hand, it doesn't ever come up with some couples. I actually know two couples where the brother and the sister are dating their ... more
I'd rather not be friends with them or talk to them
01/01/2012
Contributor: Apirka Apirka
I'm currently single, by my with my relationships in the past, their exes only bothered me if they were brought up often or I ran into them. Though none of that really happened.
03/30/2012
Contributor: dragonn dragonn
Quote:
Originally posted by Howells
I only met him once, it was enough. I don't really care as long as they are not actively in our/her life.
Same here.
03/31/2012
Contributor: SouthernBelle SouthernBelle
My girlfriend has a few exes that are still fairly active parts of our lives. It only really gets to me when one of them is actively trying to win her back (which happens once every few months).
05/08/2012
Contributor: LavenderSkies LavenderSkies
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
Ex girlfriends/boyfriends /wives/husbands always seem to be a pain in the ass for people. But on the other hand, it doesn't ever come up with some couples. I actually know two couples where the brother and the sister are dating their ... more
Memories do. Letting go of the past is easier said than done.
05/25/2012