The New Intimacy

F*g Hag/D*yke Tyke

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Contributor: Jobthingy Jobthingy
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
Does she do it for the reason i described then? Or is it more of what Naughty described?
She does it because she thinks she is that awesome that she can turn a gay man straight and truly believes this. You cannot explain to her that a gay man is not gay just because he feels like it that day. She is a moron.
11/30/2010
Contributor: sarahbear sarahbear
I've never heard it used to describe someone who was attempting to turn gay people straight before. I had always heard it used to describe straight women who preferred to have gay male friends, or straight men who preferred to have lesbian female friends. Like another commenter said, it seemed to be a term of endearment used by the homosexual friends towards their straight friends.
11/30/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
I've only heard fag hag used to describe a woman who happens to hang around with a lot of gay men, or one in particular, thus becoming that man's "hag". Never in the context of trying to get them to "turn straight again". ... more
This is what I've heard as well.
11/30/2010
Contributor: Alicia Alicia
I've only heard them like others have said, in the context of being someone who has a lot of gay/lesbian friends.
11/30/2010
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
I know a few people who "own" the terms and wear them as a badge on their chest; none of them are trying to "convert", except for their own personal desire to sleep with them.

My roomie was a professed "fag hag" until our mutual (gay) friend said "No dearie, you're too cute to be a fag hag. You're def a fruit fly!".

Just remember that names are labels and you don't have to wear it if you don't want to.
11/30/2010
Contributor: Darling Jen Darling Jen
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
I know a few people who "own" the terms and wear them as a badge on their chest; none of them are trying to "convert", except for their own personal desire to sleep with them.

My roomie was a professed "fag hag" ... more
Said beautifully, JR.
11/30/2010
Contributor: LicentiouslyYours LicentiouslyYours
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
I've only heard fag hag used to describe a woman who happens to hang around with a lot of gay men, or one in particular, thus becoming that man's "hag". Never in the context of trying to get them to "turn straight again". ... more
I've never heard the term fag hag used in the context you describe, Lauren.

I have heard it used in the context Julia describes for the last 20 years, at least.
11/30/2010
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
I've only heard fag hag used to describe a woman who happens to hang around with a lot of gay men, or one in particular, thus becoming that man's "hag". Never in the context of trying to get them to "turn straight again". ... more
This is the way I've heard it too! But "fruit fly" is my favorite. A gay guy once told me I was too pretty to be a hag, and was thus a "fruit fly," but I think, really, he was just trying to get a good tip as he was my waiter.
11/30/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by LicentiouslyYours
I've never heard the term fag hag used in the context you describe, Lauren.

I have heard it used in the context Julia describes for the last 20 years, at least.
That's the way I've been hearing it my whole life, I've never heard it the other way, and in the group I run with, it's almost a term of endearment, lol.

BBW, I've been called both for sure. Although the first time I heard the term 'fruit fly' I was in the car with my friend who was on the phone with one of his friends and I overheard him say "oh hey, you get to meet my fly tonight!". Then I felt like an idiot while he sat there and explained it to me, lol
11/30/2010
Contributor: LavenderSkies LavenderSkies
This is wrong..
11/30/2010
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
No offense but you've got the definitions of these words completely wrong. And yes, I fucking loathe people that identify as fag hags or fruit flies or whatever else. Gross. Not any cuter than when people use/d the term n-word lover for people that hung with Black people.
11/30/2010
Contributor: Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
Quote:
Originally posted by Owl Identified
No offense but you've got the definitions of these words completely wrong. And yes, I fucking loathe people that identify as fag hags or fruit flies or whatever else. Gross. Not any cuter than when people use/d the term n-word lover for people ... more
See, this is soooo weird to me cuz gay folks are the ones I hear most often actually using these terms.
11/30/2010
Contributor: Porfiriato Porfiriato
I've heard the terms, but their usage does not usually imply trying to force them to change. It usually just means someone in a platonic relationship with a gay person, when they wish the relationship could be sexual. I've never heard it used in the context of someone trying to 'force' another to be straight, or condemning the fact that they are gay.
11/30/2010
Contributor: sarahbear sarahbear
Quote:
Originally posted by Owl Identified
No offense but you've got the definitions of these words completely wrong. And yes, I fucking loathe people that identify as fag hags or fruit flies or whatever else. Gross. Not any cuter than when people use/d the term n-word lover for people ... more
I'm with Carrie Ann.

Plus, the only time I've ever heard anyone call someone a n***** lover was when a racist white person was directing it at another white person who dated or befriended a black person. It's -always- used in a derogatory way, where as fag hag and fruit fly I've only heard used by gay people towards their straight friend and it was usually meant in a cute/playful way.
11/30/2010
Contributor: KnK KnK
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
I know a few people who "own" the terms and wear them as a badge on their chest; none of them are trying to "convert", except for their own personal desire to sleep with them.

My roomie was a professed "fag hag" ... more
Aw that's cute.
11/30/2010
Contributor: kinky girlfriend kinky girlfriend
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I heard these terms today and didn't know what they meant. Because they might be offensive to others, I am going to use the terms Gaygal and Lesbro (alternatives I found). i apologize if this offends anyone.

Basically these terms are used ... more
what a interesting poll..
12/01/2010
Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Well, I always learn something new on Eden. I had never heard these terms before this poll.
01/06/2011
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
Quote:
Originally posted by sarahbear
I'm with Carrie Ann.

Plus, the only time I've ever heard anyone call someone a n***** lover was when a racist white person was directing it at another white person who dated or befriended a black person. It's -always- used in a ... more
I pretty much only hear straight girls doing it.
01/06/2011
Contributor: Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
I've only heard fag hag used to describe a woman who happens to hang around with a lot of gay men, or one in particular, thus becoming that man's "hag". Never in the context of trying to get them to "turn straight again". ... more
I'd only heard of "fag hag" once -- and it was in the context in which Jul!a described it.

The way it was explained to me was that a "fag hag" is any woman who loves flirting with gay men -- not to "convert" them or anything, but only because the woman enjoys the thrill of no-strings-attached flirting with an attractive man.

I used to live in Ft. Lauderdale and worked with lots of extremely attractive gay men. Some of my female co-workers were self-admitted "fag hags." They would happily flirt outrageously with our male co-workers (and MANY of our openly gay co-workers happily reciprocated, resulting in a lively and fun banter between them). The women could flirt without fear of any type of danger that things would escalate beyond fun flirting and the guys seemed to enjoy it, too, since they were the ones to usually initiate it.
01/06/2011
Contributor: Crystal1 Crystal1
I have heard "fag hag", but used to mean a woman who mostly has gay men as friends. I love my gay friends, but have no desire to get them to change teams!
01/07/2011
Contributor: EvaChangeN EvaChangeN
my friends try to do the opposite LOL seems like a witch hunt tho :/
02/12/2011
Contributor: Miss Jenn Miss Jenn
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I heard these terms today and didn't know what they meant. Because they might be offensive to others, I am going to use the terms Gaygal and Lesbro (alternatives I found). i apologize if this offends anyone.

Basically these terms are used ... more
That is just the weirdest.
02/12/2011
Contributor: Cream in the Cupcake Cream in the Cupcake
Never heard those terms but I have heard of people trying to do that.
02/28/2011
Contributor: lkb lkb
Quote:
Originally posted by Naughty Student
That is just so wrong to me!

It's like a very orthodox or traditional way of seeing how things "should" be. It really pisses me off actually. In the past homosexuals were considered as having psychological problems and therapy ... more
I agree wholeheartedly with this. It's super heteronormative and invasive as fuck.
03/03/2011
Contributor: beautifulpierced beautifulpierced
I have definitely heard the terms, i have gay friends (he actually has an Eden account too) and we have never really thought about it as a actual meaning in to which i mean people who actually do it. we joke about it saying im his f@gh@g but im happily married and he has a finance.. and they joke about trying to get my husband to go gay but he(my husband) has no interest in being gay but i do know of a lady in our area who claims to be lesbian and has tried to break up married straight couples by trying to turn women gay!
03/09/2011
Contributor: Midway through Midway through
I've heard fag hag, but not the other.

My gay friends use it as a term of endearment for me and my best friend. We are the "fans" of our friends, whom are drag queens. They call us their fag hags. It's a term of endearment, and does not mean we are turning them. It means we hang out around a lot of drag queens and we are girls. My friend is straight, I am not. Neither of us really has a crush or wants to turn them. We just hang at the gay bar with all our friends. So honestly I've only heard it as a good thing.

Hence why I selected that I do it. No, I don't turn anyone, but yes, I am called a fag hag.
03/09/2011
Contributor: Solar Ray Solar Ray
I didn't know it was a term for those trying to "turn" people... I thought it was just a term for those that tend to hang around gays/lesbians. Guess I'm out of the loop.
03/09/2011
Contributor: sexyintexas sexyintexas
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I heard these terms today and didn't know what they meant. Because they might be offensive to others, I am going to use the terms Gaygal and Lesbro (alternatives I found). i apologize if this offends anyone.

Basically these terms are used ... more
No, I don't consider myself one although I do have a lot of homosexual friends.
03/10/2011
Contributor: Curves Curves
what a waste of time.
04/03/2011
Contributor: sexyk515 sexyk515
I have not heard of this
04/03/2011