Are there any other Childfree individuals here on EF?

Contributor: KnK KnK
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
No. There are a small segment of the Child Free "Brat Free" people who DO these things.

Here, buzz around this board a little and see. link One of the worst at the moment is a thread called "Baby stalk, baby stalk its a wonder ... more
Wow. People are morons.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Yaoi Pervette (deleted) Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
I'm obviously not child-free. I think everyone should make their own decions about having children. There is no need for everyone to have children, and I think it is a very mature decision to say, "I really don't want kids. I don't ... more
Wow, pinching and kicking children?! That's horrible! I may not want children of my own, but I don't harbor any ill will toward them or their parents.

I appreciate what you have said about those who choose to be childless. A lot of people think childless individuals are selfish. Of course, I argue that having a baby, because all of your friends are having a baby (which I have seen happen) is pretty selfish. It's a human being, not a doll to dress up and play with!

Before I met my husband, he tried dating and his lack of desire for anymore children made it difficult. When women asked him about children, he was perfectly honest. He told them he had one and didn't want anymore. They all called him selfish. I understand that these women were probably hoping to find a decent man to settle down and have kids with, but there is no need to be rude to a man who already has one child.
10/17/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
Wow, pinching and kicking children?! That's horrible! I may not want children of my own, but I don't harbor any ill will toward them or their parents.

I appreciate what you have said about those who choose to be childless. A lot ... more
I am strongly supportive of those who choose not to have children. The reason? I love children and I love people who are honest! I agree with Chili, I HATE when someone tells a young woman who doesn't want kids, "You'll fall in love with that baby as soon as you hold him in your arms." Bullshit. I've seen the fall out of many mothers who didn't fall in love when the baby was "in arms" or later. Both the parents and the child suffer then.

I think most people are smart enough and know themselves well enough to KNOW if they want kids.

If someone says "I don't want kids." it is their choice and they know that is what is best for them. Added to that, I think it is quite brave to be honest enough with one's family, friends etc to let them know, "Nope. No kids for me. Don't even ask." I see too many people guilt-ed into having children. THAT isn't the right reason to have children. So many of them end up miserable... as do the children they brought into the world.

The ONLY reason to have children, IMHO, is when you want them more than anything in the world and are happy and willing to do anything for them. I'm one of those people, but I don't expect everyone else to give their lives in this way. It's a rational and mature choice to say No to becoming a parent.

That being said, I do expect my choice to have kids (and 3 of them to boot) to be supported, as well. I'm good at it, and I'm glad I had them. But, it is a hard life and a lot of extra work, and emotionally draining and not for everyone.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Yeah, they are pretty angry. A woman I knew wrote an expose on them (the type on the boards, and some were all ages, some actually older people in their 50s and 60s) about 12 years ago. She found some very disturbing things. Battery and Assault ... more
It's terrible that these people have that reaction without stopping to think of how they came to be a part of this world, alas their opinions are protected under the 1st Ammendment.

I don't like the term childfree. It sounds like a disease. I prefer childless and I have run into many people on the internet who posture and do what's trendy. Not having kids is trendy right now. They feel like the louder the curse and holler, they more they'll be heard. All I hear is "I'm a righteous douchebag with more time than brains".
10/17/2011
Contributor: Red Vinyl Kitty Red Vinyl Kitty
I am 100% childfree. My husband got sterilized so that we won't have to worry anymore (vasectomy has a lot less complications than a tubal, and we're married so there's no issue there).

I've just always, ever since I was a child, known I didn't want to be a parent. I get so angry, because I feel that so few people understand me, and I always get people telling me "Oh, you'll change your mind." No. I. WON'T.

Ahem.



At any rate, I really have no issue with people who have or want children. I believe having children is an important choice to make, my only real gripe is people who seem to assume they *know* how I feel, and because *THEY* had children, I will too. It's not my bag, I'll never have kids, and I am happy that way.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Red Vinyl Kitty Red Vinyl Kitty
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
It's terrible that these people have that reaction without stopping to think of how they came to be a part of this world, alas their opinions are protected under the 1st Ammendment.

I don't like the term childfree. It sounds like a ... more
You know, until I stumbled into this forum, I had no idea there was a "movement" or that it was called "childfree". I don't usually call myself "Childfree" in public or in person - but I do tell people if they ask that I have no children and have no plans on having any.
10/17/2011
Contributor: MissStormRyder MissStormRyder
I have no children or plans to have any, not at this point in my life anyway. I just don't think I would be a good mom??
10/17/2011
Contributor: AndroAngel AndroAngel
To be honest, since people have brought up the issue of names: childfree versus childless by choice, I'd like to state that personally I consider myself childfree, because I'm not "less" for not reproducing and there isn't a lack in my life. I'm simply "free" of the burden of raising children.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
I don't like the phrase "child free" as, to me, it denotes that children are a burden or blight that encumbers a person. I don't feel that way. I may want children one day, but right now I do not plan on having any. However, parenthood is an incredible service that parents provide to their children and to the world. To call myself "childfree" would, in my own mind, be implying the inverse for those parents: child-stricken, child-impeded, etc. I celebrate caring, dedicated parents just like I celebrate responsible, thoughtful folks that choose not to have 'em.

Also, P'Gell, that board is REALLY weird. Who actually becomes a MEMBER of a board DEDICATED to hating children? That is...time consuming, to say the least. Yikes.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Ghost Ghost
Quote:
Originally posted by Owl Identified
I don't like the phrase "child free" as, to me, it denotes that children are a burden or blight that encumbers a person. I don't feel that way. I may want children one day, but right now I do not plan on having any. However, ... more
There are boards dedicated to hating all other groups (of people, animals, ideas, and things), why not kids? People have a right to hatred, as much as it may pain us.
10/17/2011
Contributor: zeb zeb
I like to have all the kids in this world with parents that love them
10/17/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Red Vinyl Kitty
You know, until I stumbled into this forum, I had no idea there was a "movement" or that it was called "childfree". I don't usually call myself "Childfree" in public or in person - but I do tell people if they ask ... more
I think calling it a movement might be a little bit strong, but there is definitely a growing number of people who choose not to have children. It is, however, quite popular in one specific internet forum that I can think of (that has not already been linked) and I have to say those people are brutal for no good reason. They generally link back to arguments such as "well, it's our tax dollars paying for their brat". It's the age old problem of people counting/spending other people's money. It's ridiculous.
10/17/2011
Contributor: SilverIsis SilverIsis
I would have to say that I am of the Childfree crowd. Childless to me sounds like I think that there is something missing in my life, even if it was my choice. I have to say that I love children and think those that want to create "child-free zones" such as restaurants that have nights where children are not allowed are not appreciating all aspects of life. For me the issue is 2 fold. First, I have a genetic condition that I am pretty much guaranteed to pass on without expensive medical intervention. This disorder is very severe and could result in the death of the child at a young age or severe mental retardation if they were to survive. In addition the medical miracles that have been done to me have come with the cost that to bring a child to term within me could be risky for both me and the child. Knowing this from a young age, I grew comfortable with the idea of not having children of my own. Secondly, in my working with children I have come to the realization that they are a great responsibility and I do not have the skills to live up to that responsibility in the long term. I spoil the crap out of my best friend's son and know that I will be a great Aunt to my siblings children, but I will never have children of my own.

As for the "selfish" thing, personally I think people like the Goslings or Octomom are the selfish ones. One way or another society pays for people like them and their need to breed.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Vanille Vanille
Childfree by choice! I'm not cut out for kids and babysitting my nephew reminds me of that every day. I love kids, but as long as I can give them back at the end of the day.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Yaoi Pervette (deleted) Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
Quote:
Originally posted by Red Vinyl Kitty
I am 100% childfree. My husband got sterilized so that we won't have to worry anymore (vasectomy has a lot less complications than a tubal, and we're married so there's no issue there).

I've just always, ever since I was a ... more
I agree that people to tend to assume that the natural next step after marriage is to have children. I have had people ask me when we are going to have children. They seem puzzled when I say we are not having children. Strangely, these are some of the same folks that complain their children are driving them crazy and they're constantly broke.

A couple of posters have mentioned sterilization. When my husband had his vasectomy, the doctor would only do it, because he already had one child. I've heard it generally said that doctors will only sterilize people who have already had children. So, my question is: Do some doctors sterilize even those who've had no children?
10/17/2011
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
Quote:
Originally posted by Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
I agree that people to tend to assume that the natural next step after marriage is to have children. I have had people ask me when we are going to have children. They seem puzzled when I say we are not having children. Strangely, these are some of ... more
I'm getting mine done through public health - their only requirements are that you're over 21, have been thoroughly educated on the matter, and you're in your right mind when you decide to have it done. They give you plenty of time to change your mind, too, just in case.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Errant Venture Errant Venture
Wow. I had no idea that the term 'child-free' had such negative connotations (and that people actually go around harming kids). I'd like to change my answer to child-less. I want kids, but it's difficult at the moment. I don't mind if you don't want kids. One member, Chillipepper I believe, asked if you'd want an impatient hot-head for a parent. Well, my mother is one such person, and I can tell you it's not fun.

Beyond that, my girl has a health problem, which means, when we get round to it, we may not be able to have kids, anyway. Still, there's adoption.
10/18/2011
Contributor: Midway through Midway through
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
No. There are a small segment of the Child Free "Brat Free" people who DO these things.

Here, buzz around this board a little and see. link One of the worst at the moment is a thread called "Baby stalk, baby stalk its a wonder ... more
I would have punched her for calling me that name.

But I have a nasty nasty temper. LOL
10/18/2011
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
Quote:
Originally posted by AndroAngel
I've seen a few other people around who've mentioned being childfree, but how many of us are there on here? I'd like to meet the other childfree individuals of EF. Please introduce yourselves and if you feel like it tell me a little about ... more
I'm childfree because I don't want to have children without being married, not for any religious reason, but because of financial and security reasons. i hope to have children, just not soon.
10/18/2011
Contributor: Sinfully Sinfully
I'm 23 and have no desire to have any children now or in the future.
10/18/2011
Contributor: Sinfully Sinfully
I'm 23 and have no desire to have any children now or in the future.
10/18/2011
Contributor: Crystal1 Crystal1
I have 6 cats, 'nuff said.
10/18/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Midway through
I would have punched her for calling me that name.

But I have a nasty nasty temper. LOL
I have a bad temper, too. But, if I had punched her (and I was very upset) it only would have made her feel "vindicated" and right for her insult. And she could tell her crazy friends that a "moo" hit her.

It would only enforce the stereotype that some of these people have set up about parents.

I simply smiled and said, "Thank you."
10/18/2011
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
I was not aware of the negative connotations with 'child-free'. I knew child-haters existed, but I wasn't aware that they went Nazi and swiped a perfectly decent descriptor for themselves.
10/18/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
I was not aware of the negative connotations with 'child-free'. I knew child-haters existed, but I wasn't aware that they went Nazi and swiped a perfectly decent descriptor for themselves.
It sucks, doesn't it? It's a good way to describe people who simply do not ever want kids (as opposed to those who can't have them and want them, or who want them but haven't had them yet.) Sometimes jerks ruin things for people.

They took a good descriptive term and, at least for some, put some awful connotations on it.

10/18/2011
Contributor: WhoopieDoo WhoopieDoo
Child-free here! (not the burning hatred kind. some people want kids. good for them.)

1)There are too many people in the world as it is. WAY to many to warrant me turning my uterus into a school bus.

2)Even if the world wasn't overpopulated by humans, I wouldn't want kids. My husband and I would see them as a burden.

3)Even if the above two were obsolete, I would not want kids, because I am non-religious and I don't want my family indoctrinating/ taking it upon themselves to "save" my kids.
10/18/2011
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
All kid free here and will be staying that way now that I have really found my sexual side. I'm too selfish to give that up for rugrats!
10/18/2011
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
Quote:
Originally posted by Ghost
There are boards dedicated to hating all other groups (of people, animals, ideas, and things), why not kids? People have a right to hatred, as much as it may pain us.
Nono, I don't mean to say they shouldn't have the right to hate or have a board expressing their hate. I just mean that to dedicate so much of your time to dwelling on that hate via a board is...well, yikes.
10/20/2011