The New Intimacy

Can you forgive and forget...

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Contributor: js250 js250
js250
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js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
03/20/2012
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Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Usually forgive and forget...or just forget.

It takes a lot of energy to hold a grudge. I only have a couple grudges going on now, so that helps...
03/20/2012
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
forgive but dont really forget...
03/20/2012
Contributor: Zombirella Zombirella
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
I don't know....I guess it depends on who and what.
03/20/2012
Contributor: Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
Depends on who it is and what happened. Overall I'm usually quite forgiving, especially towards those I consider my friends. As for forgetting... well, some bad things are impossible to forget, but usually if I've forgiven someone the memories don't sting quite so much.
03/20/2012
Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
It depends on what the other person did. I've forgotten and forgiven people before for smaller things. With my boyfriend, however, he emotionally cheated on me three times (and probably would have physically cheated on me if I hadn't caught him) and I've forgiven him mostly but I'm having trouble forgetting (and definitely having trouble trusting him, especially since he lied to me and hid things from me all those times and has still been lying about other things even now when he said he'd stop). So if it's something bigger, it's incredibly hard to forgive and almost impossible to forget.
03/21/2012
Contributor: DiamondKoala DiamondKoala
Depends on the nature of the event. I'm pretty forgiving about most things so if it's something that really hurts me I'm honestly far less likely to forgive or forget it. I put up with a lot quite easily so it takes a while for me to even get to hurt. So I figure if I ever to get there I am certainly justified.
03/21/2012
Contributor: Falsepast Falsepast
absolutely not.
03/21/2012
Contributor: MR Chickhabit MR Chickhabit
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
Forgive but never forget.

its a personal struggle of mine, i have been burned too many times BADLY and i am not normally able to forget so easily.
03/21/2012
Contributor: VioletMoonstone VioletMoonstone
I can forgive but I never ever forget! When something like that happens you should learn from it, not pretend it never happened at all. I'm just that way.
03/21/2012
Contributor: Jammin14580 Jammin14580
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
I always forgive. Forgetting is 50/50. I rarely hold grudges though
05/05/2012
Contributor: Peaches2000 Peaches2000
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
I really try to forgive, but I never go back for a repeat. That doesn't mean I end the relationship of write the person off. I just change the rules and protect myself more.
05/05/2012
Contributor: UnknownGirl UnknownGirl
I guess it depends on what their crime was.
05/05/2012
Contributor: B2 B2
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
I always forgive and forget. It's not worth the energy to say mad.
05/05/2012
Contributor: SMichelle SMichelle
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
It depends on what was done.
I don't hold grudges, but I won't always forget what was done.
05/05/2012
Contributor: powerandintent powerandintent
depends on what was done and if the person apologized (and if so, if they meant it).

I was a bridesmaid in my(ex) best friends wedding a week after my brother died. She was a complete bridezilla and treated me like crap all day, but I still stayed for the whole thing. At the reception I asked a couple friends for a ride and said I was ready to go home and told them why. I got a phone call from the bride a few weeks later saying how I needed to "stop using my brothers death to be a selfish bitch" and that I ruined her wedding because I was upset.

Unforgivable.

She's tried to talk to me, but never tried to apologize in almost 4 years. I'd never forgive her anyway, even if she did say she was sorry.
05/05/2012
Contributor: Bex1331 Bex1331
usually forgive and forget, especially if they apologize, it's just way too much work to hold a grudge...
05/05/2012
Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
It is really hard for me to forgive, let alone forget. I'm trying, though..
05/05/2012
Contributor: indiglo indiglo
As others have said, it does depend on who it is, what they did and their attitude about it.

But, regardless, I try to forgive just for myself - even if we never reestablish the relationship. Carrying a grudge is exhausting!

When I forgive, I forget in the sense that I will not bring it up to the person ever again - not even in anger. Once forgiven, it's off the table for future anger.

Now I may not forget the lesson I learned. For example, if a close friend were to break my confidence and divulge some personal, embarrassing information - and later apologize and ask forgiveness... I'd forgive them, and forget in the sense that I wouldn't bring it up to them to make them feel bad constantly, but I would remember the lesson and maybe not talk to them about such personal matters in the future.
05/06/2012
Contributor: Peggi Peggi
I forgive...but I never...ever...EVER forget. And often, I harbor a grudge, no matter how well I get along with people. I worked for almost 2 years with an office manager who was my ex mother in-law, who hated me even BEFORE the divorce and even more after, and I was sweet as pie to her.

I can fake it, but unless I really REALLY care about you, I'll probably hold that secret grudge, even if I "forgive" you. My forgiveness has 2 levels.
05/18/2012
Contributor: Mamastoys Mamastoys
I forgive and try to forget but sometimes it is hard. It takes too much energy to hold grudges. I try to just avoid the person if possible or try to keep my mouth shut when I am around them..
05/22/2012
Contributor: Undecided Undecided
depends on the situation
05/22/2012
Contributor: Ilovelingerie Ilovelingerie
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
I can forgive but if its really bad, no matter how hard I try… I just can’t forget.
05/23/2012
Contributor: Envoutes Envoutes
It depends on the circumstances involved, but I rarely forget. Ever. Forgive, though? That's highly debatable.
05/23/2012
Contributor: sexystuffeve sexystuffeve
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
When another person does something that really hurts or angers you and apologizes for it, do you...

Forgive and forget.
Forgive but never forget.
Hold a grudge.
My memory is good, but sometime I can let it go and forgive.
05/23/2012
Contributor: GONE! GONE!
Neither, unless it's someone I love enough to try.
05/23/2012
Contributor: 31 Flavors 31 Flavors
Try and forgive, can't forget, the grudge depends on our prior relationship.
05/23/2012
Contributor: TheSinDoll TheSinDoll
Get stabby with their face.


Oh, I'm kinda kidding...

;D

Don't waste your time letting that shit bother you. Let it go and live your life happily.

If nothing else, drink until you forget about it!
05/23/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
I don't waste my time holding a grudge because they are very unhealthy. However, I do not forgive or forget. If you cross me by doing something good, I will never forgive or forget. I just can't. If it's something stupid, then forgiveness doesn't need to even be asked for.
06/02/2012
Contributor: Talena Talena
I usually forgive but usually never forget.
06/16/2012