My girlfriend was kind of stone at first, but she just wasn't used to past girlfriends wanting to equally satisfy one another. Everything's very mutual now

Hmmm, no.

This expression first came about during a time when "stone" was slang for "extremely"- as in a "stone fox" was someone really hot, "stone cold" was someone really tough, etc. That's what a stone butch was- someone who was really really butch. And at the time, part of being really butch meant not being on the recieving end of sexual penetration. The most masculine way to relate to your woman was through your cock, which happened to be lack nerve endings.

Nowadays I like to think we have progressed a bit farther, past the point where getting fucked or touched = being feminine. Men are more open about liking the recieving end, and I like to think that butches can be too, if thats what they want. Sure there is still stigma, there probably always will be, but we've come a long way.

I do know people who simply prefer not to recieve penetration or direct stimulation, and that works for them, so more power to them.

Yes, she is now a he and is doing pretty damn well in life. When he was still a she, I wasn't allowed to reciprocate because he didn't feel comfortable. Now that he's a he, his current partner gets to reciprocate. I have no hurt feelings about it and we're best friends now. We found out we were better off friends and I've done everything I can to help him get settled and start the process of changing. I'm very glad to call him my friend.

just a one night fling and I didn't enjoy it...she was a nice girl just not my type of love

Shortly after starting T in college I was kind of but not really in a relationship with a Femme lesbian and fuck, I loved her. I myself was really stone at the time and was actually taking and LGBT studies class where we were assigned to read Stone Butch Blues by Leslie Feinberg. With going through all the changes of T and reading that book... it was the most intense experience I'd ever been through with a relationship.

I wouldn't classify myself as a stone, but I probably am in the strict sense of the term. At least, I fall into this category of women who would rather please than be pleased. Like some of you who have posted in this discussion, I orgasm less often than my partners usually. I prefer not to be touched with fingers or licked... don't get me wrong, it feels great! But it doesn't really get me there. I think this has to do with some anxiety on my end of "not being able to perform (orgasm)" or fearing that I'm taking too long-- that it's exasperating for my partner-- which causes so much stress that I'd rather just avoid it... it sucks, and it's something I definitely struggle with. I wish could orgasm easily like so many women seem to be able to!

I'm really sensitive to the opinions of those who say they didn't enjoy being with a stone, simply because of the reasons listed above. Not trying to call anyone out or anything, just trying to show how being stone is, at least for me, impacted significantly by this type of negative reaction. Knowing that a partner may feel this way makes my vagina want to clam up even more (pun intended!), and it feels as though its not worth it to even bother letting you try, because it probably just won't happen... My fear of judgment kills my confidence and thus my comfort.

Now, if it were just for the reasons above I don't know that I'd really be a stone... rather I'd just feel psycho-sexually dysfunctional. But I can orgasm with partners, just not from their hands or tongues!

To orgasm I also need to be in a specific position and have a very specific type of stimulation--firm, all over clit pressure-- I come every time from my girlfriend grinding on the dildo, making it rub against my clit. So it's not that I don't like being pleased... I just don't enjoy certain types of touch as much, mostly for psychological reasons.

Then there's the fact that I get so turned on by seeing/feeling/hearing my partner turned on. If s/he's not into it, I will NEVER COME. So that probably contributes to my proclivity for orgasm during penetration rather than having someone stimulate me without being stimulated themselves.

Phew! Just some thoughts I thought I'd put out there... being "stone" is really misunderstood, as some of you have mentioned. This is an important topic to me. Hope these thoughts shed some light on the topic for those of you out there that are confused or curious.

I've been with stone butches and, since I'm usually shoehorned into the femme category, I'm typically, in my experience, expected to be ok with it. I'm not. Mutual sex is vital to my happiness. Some of my past lovers have felt comfortable enough with me after time to bend the rules, which was always a privilege and an honor I cherished. There's something incredible about being given the gift of someone letting down walls that are normall tightly guarded.

Can't say I have ever been with someone like that before.

Never been with one.

Never been with one, but have known a few over the years

I've definitely dated butches, but none that could be called "stone cold".

I've never been with anyone stone. I've had stony moments myself, but I don't identify as stone because my moments are dysphoria-related.

the girl i'm with now is a bit of a stone we haven't really discussed specific boundaries but there are a few typical things she just won't do

Really don't like the label.