It is possible that a male would confuse a life long promise to care and love another, for one that provides sex. But if the person is the type to not marry just because they are getting sex already, then I don't think are much of a man at all. Makeing the commitment is as easy as a breath, keeping the commitment is what makes them a man.
Myth or truth? (ready for this one?....) IF YOU GET THE MILK FOR FREE...is there ANY REASON TO BUY THE COW?? (yes, your GREAT GRANDMA DID USE THIS SAYING!!!!)
01/28/2012
Quote:
Why do we always have to call the woman a cow? If a guy puts out on a first date, I usually don't consider him to be dating material!
Originally posted by
Bignuf
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with
...
more
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with friends about that one! One of their daughters was being seriously courted by a nice guy. She had to move to find a good job, he followed. To "save money" they moved in together and now, the "marriage", which was going to be in about a year at most, is now THREE YEARS LATE and she keeps complaining he is "always making excuses now" and just does not want to commit. Hummmmm??? SO, how true IS it?
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01/30/2012
Quote:
never heard that before so I'm not sure if i think it's true or not
Originally posted by
Bignuf
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with
...
more
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with friends about that one! One of their daughters was being seriously courted by a nice guy. She had to move to find a good job, he followed. To "save money" they moved in together and now, the "marriage", which was going to be in about a year at most, is now THREE YEARS LATE and she keeps complaining he is "always making excuses now" and just does not want to commit. Hummmmm??? SO, how true IS it?
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02/15/2012
Quote:
Yes!
Originally posted by
P'Gell
I HATE this analogy. Passionately.
It makes the assumption that women do NOT enjoy sex, and that "the milk" (what an odd way to describe sexual congress) is something a woman "gives" and a man "takes", not ... more
It makes the assumption that women do NOT enjoy sex, and that "the milk" (what an odd way to describe sexual congress) is something a woman "gives" and a man "takes", not ... more
I HATE this analogy. Passionately.
It makes the assumption that women do NOT enjoy sex, and that "the milk" (what an odd way to describe sexual congress) is something a woman "gives" and a man "takes", not something they share together.
It also implies that women "save" sex until they get something they want (Oh, we all want to get married in that white dress ever so badly! So badly, in fact, that we will "deny" the person we love and ourselves the joy of sex just so..... he doesn't get "free milk? WTF?) It reduces women to manipulative house shrews and men to... I don't know... farmers? Pigs?
It's stupid and I call anyone on the carpet who uses this stupid analogy.
A healthy couple enjoys sex together, both enjoying the pleasure and offering pleasure to their partner.
This analogy sucks. I wish it would go the way of "23 Skidoo" and other outdated and silly expressions.
I don't like being compared to a cow, and I certainly never made any real milk until I was about 7 months pregnant with my first child... and I see no comparisons to making milk and having sex. None. less
It makes the assumption that women do NOT enjoy sex, and that "the milk" (what an odd way to describe sexual congress) is something a woman "gives" and a man "takes", not something they share together.
It also implies that women "save" sex until they get something they want (Oh, we all want to get married in that white dress ever so badly! So badly, in fact, that we will "deny" the person we love and ourselves the joy of sex just so..... he doesn't get "free milk? WTF?) It reduces women to manipulative house shrews and men to... I don't know... farmers? Pigs?
It's stupid and I call anyone on the carpet who uses this stupid analogy.
A healthy couple enjoys sex together, both enjoying the pleasure and offering pleasure to their partner.
This analogy sucks. I wish it would go the way of "23 Skidoo" and other outdated and silly expressions.
I don't like being compared to a cow, and I certainly never made any real milk until I was about 7 months pregnant with my first child... and I see no comparisons to making milk and having sex. None. less
I hate this shaming for women who have sex. I didn't wait to have sex until marriage and my partner still wants to marry me.
03/06/2012
Quote:
My parents (who are divorced) have both told me that the reason they got married was that they wanted to have sex, but didn't want to "sin." So, they got married before knowing each other well and it was a disaster. In fact, most people I know who didn't test drive each other sexually before getting married have ended up miserable. How could you know what someone is going to be like in one of the most important arenas of your life without sampling it first?
Originally posted by
geliebt
Exactly. I think that if someone isn't gonna commit, it probably isn't ONLY because they can get sex.
And anyway, wanting to have sex is an awful reason to get married =\
And anyway, wanting to have sex is an awful reason to get married =\
03/06/2012
BUSTED!
03/07/2012
Quote:
well said
Originally posted by
Cherrylane
If you enjoy being around and caring for the cow, enough so to want the cow to yourself because you think the cow enhances your life and, dare I say it, you come to in fact Love the cow, whether or not you already get the milk for free doesn't
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If you enjoy being around and caring for the cow, enough so to want the cow to yourself because you think the cow enhances your life and, dare I say it, you come to in fact Love the cow, whether or not you already get the milk for free doesn't really matter. Because you want the cow.
To say that men would no longer want women as long as they could have sex basically assumes that the only thing women have to offer anyone is sex. If a man's experience with women has led him to believe that, then he apparently has horrible taste in women. If a woman believes that and isn't 100 years old, that's just sad.
If the guy isn't comfortable marrying the girl, it's not simply because he's getting sex. It's because he's insecure about their relationship and what marriage might change. It is a big investment. Whether or not he's getting laid has nothing to do with it. They should reanalyze why they wanted to get married, why it hasn't happened, and where they should go from there. If she's really all bent out of shape about it, and he actually wants to marry her, they will. less
To say that men would no longer want women as long as they could have sex basically assumes that the only thing women have to offer anyone is sex. If a man's experience with women has led him to believe that, then he apparently has horrible taste in women. If a woman believes that and isn't 100 years old, that's just sad.
If the guy isn't comfortable marrying the girl, it's not simply because he's getting sex. It's because he's insecure about their relationship and what marriage might change. It is a big investment. Whether or not he's getting laid has nothing to do with it. They should reanalyze why they wanted to get married, why it hasn't happened, and where they should go from there. If she's really all bent out of shape about it, and he actually wants to marry her, they will. less
03/08/2012
I am a firm believer that no one should get married without having sex first. If you are not sexually compatible, the marriage will suffer. And no one should get married just to have sex. If sex is all you are after, it won't be a pretty marriage. As far as higher divorce rates for people who live together before marriage, there is a third variable there. Correlation does not imply causation, people. The people who are willing to live together before marriage don't typically have the same strictmindsetsabout marriage and are more likely to seek divorce if something does go wrong. The people with strong feelings about not cohabitating before marriage are often the same people with strong feelings about not getting divorced. Religion plays a big part here. As divorce is becoming more acceptable, rates will even out between the two groups.
03/16/2012
Quote:
uh yeah that's bullshit
Originally posted by
Bignuf
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with
...
more
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with friends about that one! One of their daughters was being seriously courted by a nice guy. She had to move to find a good job, he followed. To "save money" they moved in together and now, the "marriage", which was going to be in about a year at most, is now THREE YEARS LATE and she keeps complaining he is "always making excuses now" and just does not want to commit. Hummmmm??? SO, how true IS it?
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03/20/2012
my fiancee and i have tons of sex but there are other things he sees in marriage such as kids and living together
03/22/2012
Quote:
With some folks yes, i think that this is something that can be an issue or a reason for EITHER party to work harder at a committed relationship. but i still think that when you find someone and timing/feelings are right, you're going to go for the ring/date/marriage anyways.
Originally posted by
Bignuf
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with
...
more
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with friends about that one! One of their daughters was being seriously courted by a nice guy. She had to move to find a good job, he followed. To "save money" they moved in together and now, the "marriage", which was going to be in about a year at most, is now THREE YEARS LATE and she keeps complaining he is "always making excuses now" and just does not want to commit. Hummmmm??? SO, how true IS it?
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03/24/2012
Quote:
if the only reason why a guy would marry you is to guarantee monogamous sex, then something is seriously wrong with either him or you
Originally posted by
Bignuf
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with
...
more
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with friends about that one! One of their daughters was being seriously courted by a nice guy. She had to move to find a good job, he followed. To "save money" they moved in together and now, the "marriage", which was going to be in about a year at most, is now THREE YEARS LATE and she keeps complaining he is "always making excuses now" and just does not want to commit. Hummmmm??? SO, how true IS it?
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03/25/2012
if you're living with someone (i guess the cow in this analogy?) you're already buying it in more ways than being married.
04/15/2012
It might be true for a bit, but eventually if this guy wants a family he is going to have to commit. If he doesn't, it wasn't meant to be to begin with.
04/15/2012
Marriage isn't always a financial asset and it's also a matter of convenience in your personal life too. Cohabitation is easier than marriage. Marriage is hard work, most who are married here on EF will second that.
04/15/2012
busted
04/16/2012
I think it depends on the guy.
04/16/2012
Quote:
My husband and i lived in "sin" for 2 years with him "getting the milk for free" he still proposed and now we have two children.
Originally posted by
Bignuf
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with
...
more
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with friends about that one! One of their daughters was being seriously courted by a nice guy. She had to move to find a good job, he followed. To "save money" they moved in together and now, the "marriage", which was going to be in about a year at most, is now THREE YEARS LATE and she keeps complaining he is "always making excuses now" and just does not want to commit. Hummmmm??? SO, how true IS it?
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A true man will do the commitment thing when its right.
A pansy ass will never commit and will dodge it at every turn
04/16/2012
I don't believe it's true for all men. My husband wasn't like that...he got it for free and wanted a ring on my finger faster than I was even ready for!
04/19/2012
I too am a fan of test-driving the car before you buy. I mean, what if we had turned out to be completely sexually incompatible after marriage?! That would be awful! As it was, I got to 'train' him up and realize his sexual potential, which was just awesome
04/20/2012
Personally i wont sleep with a man unless im in a committed relationship and have been with him for a while but i have also only ever been with one man
05/02/2012
Does it matter? You don't have to get married and bares no real fruit outside of titles and tax breaks.
I don't think it's true. But, frankly, I don't care about getting married. I just want to be with the person I'm with.
I don't think it's true. But, frankly, I don't care about getting married. I just want to be with the person I'm with.
05/04/2012
I'm not sure. I've had sex with someone and it turned into a marriage. It's really hard to say though. Guys are complex. Some would probably feel that way while others wouldn't.
05/20/2012
Quote:
Originally posted by
Bignuf
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with
...
more
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with friends about that one! One of their daughters was being seriously courted by a nice guy. She had to move to find a good job, he followed. To "save money" they moved in together and now, the "marriage", which was going to be in about a year at most, is now THREE YEARS LATE and she keeps complaining he is "always making excuses now" and just does not want to commit. Hummmmm??? SO, how true IS it?
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05/21/2012
I think the myth should be busted purely on gender stereotypes I mean cows? Really? What a metaphor.
06/03/2012
I don't think marriage is important. I think loving and respecting your partner is all that matters - not a silly piece of paper.
BTW - I am in a very happy, committed and loving relationship that just happens to be a marriage for other reasons.
BTW - I am in a very happy, committed and loving relationship that just happens to be a marriage for other reasons.
06/05/2012
Quote:
Thank you! I get frustrated when people assume that marriage is the only way to prove commitment. I feel we would have just a solid of a relationship if were were married or not. It just depends on the couple. Yes, I am married - but for legal reasons (adoption).
Originally posted by
AndroAngel
I think I'd rather not be a cow to be bought, hence, no "ring on it"... That said, I don't think it matters one way or another if you're having sex, sex isn't the only thing a person has to offer another... And I have to
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more
I think I'd rather not be a cow to be bought, hence, no "ring on it"... That said, I don't think it matters one way or another if you're having sex, sex isn't the only thing a person has to offer another... And I have to ask: Why do you have to get married to be committed for life?
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06/05/2012
Quote:
Exactly! My husband wants to spend the rest of his life with me because he likes Me.
Originally posted by
Tuesday
I know many women, myself included, who gave the milk away for free and are now married to the milk recipient.
I would have hated it if we had only gotten married because we wanted to have Sex. I have known many people who have waited until marriage and married the first person the were sexually attracted to... none of them are happily married today. Most of them either divorced or have seperate bedrooms.
06/24/2012
Quote:
If a couple is "marriage minded" then they will get married, if not then they most likely, in the absence of pressure, they won't. I have seldom seen a relationship work where someone felt pressured to make a commitment. I want sex isn't a good reason for marriage!
Originally posted by
Bignuf
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with
...
more
So...is it true? If you live with the guy...and he get's it "free", is there LESS drive to "put a ring on it..and say I DO" or does it really NOT matter and this "myth is busted"????? We had a BIG discussion with friends about that one! One of their daughters was being seriously courted by a nice guy. She had to move to find a good job, he followed. To "save money" they moved in together and now, the "marriage", which was going to be in about a year at most, is now THREE YEARS LATE and she keeps complaining he is "always making excuses now" and just does not want to commit. Hummmmm??? SO, how true IS it?
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06/24/2012
Marriage has been redefined, just by nature as a whole, regardless of what religious conservatives want to believe.
06/24/2012