I'm still trying to figure it out. When I was younger, I was totally into the whole Fairy Tale Sex belief (he's perfect, it's awesome, we'll fuck happily ever after). Then I ended up in a celibate marriage which completely destroyed that expectation.

After my separation and divorce and a brief FWB, I came to an odd conclusion that even movies/music/novels were delusional about how great sex is. Everyone exaggerates how wonderful it is to keep up appearances.

The man I'm engaged to has been patient in educating me that it's an ever-evolving learning experience. Being with him has been better than all my previous experience, so the expectations have been more realistic. I suspect, though, that I will find that Holy Grail of mind blowing sex once I make peace with several of my neuroses. less