How important is foreplay in your relationship?

Contributor: spicywife spicywife
I'm interested in learning how important foreplay is, especially in comparison to females versus males. If your situation doesn't match one on the list, then comment and let me know! Thanks!
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
It's a must, period. (I'm female)
43  (36%)
It's a must, period. (I'm male)
10  (8%)
I can take it or leave it (I'm female)
5  (4%)
I can take it or leave it (I'm male)
I mostly do it for my partner who needs/wants it (I'm female)
I mostly do it for my partner who needs/wants it (I'm male)
It depends on our mood or how much time we have (I'm female)
43  (36%)
It depends on our mood or how much time we have (I'm male)
14  (12%)
I don't like it at all, really.. (I'm female)
1  (1%)
I don't like it at all, really.. (I'm male)
Other..... please specify!
4  (3%)
Total votes: 120
Poll is closed
07/07/2009
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Contributor: spicywife spicywife
If you want to comment on why you chose that particular answer, it would be great too.. Thanks
07/07/2009
Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
It depends on the situation? Some days I'm good to go with none and others I don't get enough
07/07/2009
Contributor: LicentiouslyYours LicentiouslyYours
Ok, I said it's a must, but what constitutes foreplay, for me, is sometimes having him grab me by the hair and bend me over the back of the chair without much pretense. Being taken without regard can BE my foreplay even tho it's actually a complete lack of foreplay.

On the other hand, so much of foreplay can begin hours or days before with signals and whispers and touches that lead up, eventually, to being just grabbed and...I'm babbling, sorry.
07/07/2009
Contributor: spicywife spicywife
Quote:
Originally posted by LicentiouslyYours
Ok, I said it's a must, but what constitutes foreplay, for me, is sometimes having him grab me by the hair and bend me over the back of the chair without much pretense. Being taken without regard can BE my foreplay even tho it's actually a ... more
Great point! Foreplay can begin hours or days before with teases, whispers, etc and then there is little to on foreplay before the actual act.

I voted "it's a must" because well, it is.. even if it's just teasing my husband and telling him what I want to do later. But we always have some sort of foreplay, the length just depends on a variety of factors. We have to creative since we're parents too.
07/07/2009
Contributor: spicywife spicywife
"to be creative" I meant.

I think that foreplay is also essential because it helps me relax. With the stresses of everyday life, it's nice to have foreplay to just enjoy things and get ready for more the more "heavy" parts. I've struggled with just wanting to push sex aside because I was just too spent at the end of the day. I'm a stay at home mom, which I love, but boy is it tiring on the mind and body. But I've learned that if I just give it a chance, I can overcome that initial tired-feeling with some great foreplay. I know my body though and I can tell if I'm really too tired and don't want to. But luckily, that's not too often anymore.
07/07/2009
Contributor: Jimbo Jones Jimbo Jones
We almost always do have it because it makes the whole experience better for both of us, but sometimes it's just a "quickie" so it isn't absolutely necessary so I put that it depends on the mood or how much time we have.
07/08/2009
Contributor: Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
I have to have it. It doesn't have to be long and drawn out, necessarily, but I definitely need to be turned on and ready before I start having sex. I'm far too vaginally delicate in the first place to risk hurting myself just because I want to rush in to some rough strap-on/PiV sex.
07/08/2009
Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
Don't want to analyze to death, but foreplay can be just a call, saying "see ya'
Overall, I just have to be aroused, otherwise it just doesn't work for me. I know, most times, except the early am, I need at least one orgasm prior to penetration. Toys are a great asset for me.
07/08/2009
Contributor: LikeSunshineDust LikeSunshineDust
To echo everyone else, I need foreplay in some form or another. Whether it be from sexy talk or physical stimulation, I need to be warmed up for sex beforehand.
07/09/2009
Contributor: EffinSara EffinSara
I don't see foreplay and "sex" as being discrete (not "discreet"). I feel that separating them out like that is part of a view that my female body is made for PIV intercourse and that anything else doesn't count as sex and is merely "foreplay", even if PIV intercourse isn't necessarily the main event for me. Fuck that.
11/20/2009
Contributor: hornymommy hornymommy
Foreplay doesn't depend on our mood whatsoever; merely whether we have time or not.
11/21/2009
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
For me it depends on my mood. Sometimes I want to get to the main event as soon as possible. Other times I like to take my time. Fortunately, or maybe sometimes unfortunately for us, intercourse takes at least an hour. So I have to be in the mood to go longer than that to want foreplay.
12/03/2009
Contributor: Dick-n-Jane Dick-n-Jane
I find that I typically benefit more from foreplay than she does. This runs counter to typical roles, I believe. Most of the time, Jane could take it or leave it... but I love the crescendo of desire that kissing and touching brings to sex. Sometimes I have difficulty reaching orgasm in the absence of foreplay's build-up.

- Dick
12/03/2009
Contributor: Cinnamon Cinnamon
We do what Master says, plain and simple. Fortunately, most of the time He does insist on giving it to me! He's a nice Master.
12/03/2009
Contributor: frisky069 frisky069
i personally like foreplay, it gets me in the mood alot more, and makes me stay in the mood longer, but if we don't have the time, i'll go straight to having sex, but either way, i'm satisfied =]
12/04/2009
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by Dick-n-Jane
I find that I typically benefit more from foreplay than she does. This runs counter to typical roles, I believe. Most of the time, Jane could take it or leave it... but I love the crescendo of desire that kissing and touching brings to sex. ... more
I'd say a little like you. Due to my wife's busy schedule - sometimes she's rather 'just get to it' - but I rarely comply. She readily admits to being the beneficiary of my patience.

Taking the time to do it right is the only way to achieve multiple orgasms and squirting - both of which I introduced her to - and that she enjoys tremendously.
12/04/2009
Contributor: seaofneptune seaofneptune
Quote:
Originally posted by LicentiouslyYours
Ok, I said it's a must, but what constitutes foreplay, for me, is sometimes having him grab me by the hair and bend me over the back of the chair without much pretense. Being taken without regard can BE my foreplay even tho it's actually a ... more
I agree as well, I really enjoy teasing my partner and get him all riled up before we begin and it helps to get or keep me in the mood through out the day. I never really thought about it as foreplay either - but it could be consituted!
12/22/2009
Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Foreplay has become something I need a lot more of these days
12/22/2009
Contributor: Raven Raven
I love foreplay and luckily have a husband who also loves it. But there are times when I am so turned on before we start that I have no problem going right to the main attraction.
01/02/2010
Contributor: ordinaryak ordinaryak
Foreplay for me unfortunantly is a must. i say unfotunatly becuase theres many times when im ready to go but my lady parts are not. My Boyfriend has a slightly larger then average size penis and i am quite small (small enough to have been torn from him after we'd been having sex for 2 years) so for us i need to be like ready to orgasm right then before we can have sex otherwise it is incredably painful he bumps my cervix,stretches me out to the point i feel im splitting in half and generally cant move much. I feel very bad becuase hes told me none of his othergirlfriends have ever had theese problems before he didnt know what foreplay was untill we got together. and i feel bad becuase we cannot realy just have a spontanious momment. although hes neevr argued or says it bores him hes always telling me about how much he love it but i still feel he is fibbing sometimes.
02/17/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by LicentiouslyYours
Ok, I said it's a must, but what constitutes foreplay, for me, is sometimes having him grab me by the hair and bend me over the back of the chair without much pretense. Being taken without regard can BE my foreplay even tho it's actually a ... more
Nope you answered pretty much the same way I was going to! Sometimes just a grab and slam is enough to have my knees go weak other times I want the complete build up. My guys have learned to try the grab first and then sweeten it up if I resist...it's safer for them LOL.
02/17/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
It isn't necessarily important as it is more of a thing that we just do. We have foreplay unintentionally, because I'm always groping at her beforehand no matter what. We've never once just had sex. There have been times where it's been spontaneous, but I tend to turn her on very easily and I get turned on very easily.
02/17/2010
Contributor: GNGenie GNGenie
I picked "take it or leave it (female)" because, well...sometimes I'm already ready to go, and sometimes I'm just not that into sex and he's really trying my patience with extended foreplay.
04/12/2010
Contributor: Alicia Alicia
I answered that "it's a must, period". But sometimes very rarely I'll just want a quickie. But in general, and in order for me to be 100% satisfied I want foreplay. The most important and longest time spent for us is non penetrative sex.
06/11/2010
Contributor: Newlyinclined Newlyinclined
I answered "it's a must, period". This is mostly because in my relationship with my boyfriend, we agreed that we'd hold off on actual sex--so it's pretty much all foreplay for us--but I couldn't be happier, we're both learning what gets each other off without jumping straight to sex.
06/11/2010
Contributor: The Giveaway Diva The Giveaway Diva
I answered it's a must! I feel like the sex is better when do you have some sort of foreplay although it doesn't have to drag on for a long time!
06/15/2010
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
It is a must must must. Agreeing with the above, it doesn't have to be immediately before. But I prefer to not feel like a piece of meat so...I don't like the just grab and go. Every once and a while that is exciting but if it is out of no where with no build up all the time I don't feel the passion.
06/15/2010
Contributor: usmcwife99 usmcwife99
let me first say I LOVE MY ORGASMS and thats that.

However I can go without them.

Ive gone two years without even seeing my husband do to miltary deployments....in that two years I had no orgasms and I still loved him to death, every deployment just makes us even closer. I dont think sex is needed with our realtionship as ive learned but its never bad and I think it can help one.
06/24/2010
Contributor: CherryMinx CherryMinx
I normally get extremely wet and I get wet very easily. My lover can spank me, barely touch my nipples, or do something remotely sexual and I will be turned on and ready to go. I love foreplay, but it's not necessary, not to say it's not nice when it happens - also not to say that there is a lack of it either
07/05/2010