You can also check out fetlife.com which is a bdsm based community where you can find local support groups and other like minded people in your community as well as tons of great information getting into bdsm. As well as safety when evolving different play since even the simplest of ties ( rope around wrist ) can cause nerve damage if not done and watched carefully. less

The next time I went I turned on the private browsing window. col
Total of 3 times and not visited since. Hope the forum picks up here so will not wander. Soon cold spell will be over and I will be able to go outdoors again. Oh, that also means more yard work and drats spring cleaning.

Yes, I know less

At first I didn't even know about this hidden world. I'm naturally a little shy in the bedroom. I never understood why I felt the need to be "led". Call it cliché but after a few books about the subject I started to feel like there might be a missing piece to my puzzle. I think I may be naturally submissive. I also have some anxiety and get tense from work a lot! I thought a little BDSM practice could help release some of those tensions. After what I have read I have found it extremely arousing but I understand a lot is probably fluff lol. I know im not into anything hard core. But I'm curious about how to bring my husband into this concept of play without him thinking I have lost my mind. Not to mention. ..he is clueless to the lifestyle (at least i think he is) and the sexy visions floating around in my little head. Im not sure really where or how to begin. I just know that I think this is something I need/want. Help please. I feel kind of green and all over the place with this. Wherected does a new couple begin? What if I hurt his feelings by implying our current love making isn't enough less

At first I didn't even know about this hidden world. I'm naturally a little shy in the bedroom. I never understood why I felt the need to be "led". Call it cliché but after a few books about the subject I started to feel like there might be a missing piece to my puzzle. I think I may be naturally submissive. I also have some anxiety and get tense from work a lot! I thought a little BDSM practice could help release some of those tensions. After what I have read I have found it extremely arousing but I understand a lot is probably fluff lol. I know im not into anything hard core. But I'm curious about how to bring my husband into this concept of play without him thinking I have lost my mind. Not to mention. ..he is clueless to the lifestyle (at least i think he is) and the sexy visions floating around in my little head. Im not sure really where or how to begin. I just know that I think this is something I need/want. Help please. I feel kind of green and all over the place with this. Wherected does a new couple begin? What if I hurt his feelings by implying our current love making isn't enough less

At first I didn't even know about this hidden world. I'm naturally a little shy in the bedroom. I never understood why I felt the need to be "led". Call it cliché but after a few books about the subject I started to feel like there might be a missing piece to my puzzle. I think I may be naturally submissive. I also have some anxiety and get tense from work a lot! I thought a little BDSM practice could help release some of those tensions. After what I have read I have found it extremely arousing but I understand a lot is probably fluff lol. I know im not into anything hard core. But I'm curious about how to bring my husband into this concept of play without him thinking I have lost my mind. Not to mention. ..he is clueless to the lifestyle (at least i think he is) and the sexy visions floating around in my little head. Im not sure really where or how to begin. I just know that I think this is something I need/want. Help please. I feel kind of green and all over the place with this. Wherected does a new couple begin? What if I hurt his feelings by implying our current love making isn't enough less

Ok so... BDSM... I think its cool. I commend those who do it and enjoy it but not for me.

Here's why. I hate being tied up and so does my wife. I just don't like being restrained in any way. I love being kinky, I am all about the whips and chains (sort to speak) but the being restrained part im not into.

Now I think you may find a lot of men feel that way about themselves (im not saying all and I could be wrong) and it makes them feel uncomfortable to do it to their SO's.

Before you get into being tied up and all of the BDSM use things approaching that and slowly suggest adding things. When he gets to "id rather not" you know where not to go or you will know you should stay there for a while and possibly over some more time introduce more things to play with as his level of comfort may get better over time.

just my 2 cents less

Guess I'm just a big wiener. Guess was cold when younger and really prefer the warmth. Could pay me enough to live in places like Alaska. Boston is all about snow lately but at least they have Maine Lobsters , Yum Yum !

We both love seafood ! less

oh and one last thing... im not slamming any of these books or this new culture of BDSM becoming more popular with E.L. James. Good for her! However keep in mind that a lot of people who aren't acclimated with sex toys or their own body are hopping directly into BDSM. The problem is BDSM is more or less (in my mind) for "Advanced Users".

The problem with that is that people try to get into BDSM right away without taking the usual steps up to it find it to be awkward and uncomfortable. And they are super excited to get into it and spend all sorts of money getting toys and BDSM stuff then they dont really know how to proceed.

Take your time learn about your body add things slowly and then next thing you know you will be begging to add another piece to your collection.

Oh and one last thing... I did say collection. GOOD BDSM gear is expensive (I didn't say I NEVER did) and it really is a collection. You will find that saving your money and buying the better equipment serves you in the long run AND that also limits you to building your toy collection and maximizing and exploring what that toy can do until you add another part to your collection.

(mmm... I do like leather)

Oh and one thing that you can start out with is bondage collars. (We both have one) Ours however are anklets and can be covered by pants and socks so we both know its there and cant take it off without the others permission. (See what im saying) Its easing your way in and staying where your comfortable.

Check out my good buddy Vad and ibi and link. Vad is awesome and was super helpful in ordering ours. I am going to be getting a cuff next to wear on my wrist... I think both of us are. The anklet is awesome its just big and uncomfortable for extended use.

Ours are on this page link

Let me know what you think! less

Ok ok... Last thing... He just brought back anklets and cuffs. He stopped making them for a while because people were messing up their orders and he may stop making them again.

I am actually going upstairs after I type this to talk to her about buying one!

On and there are other companies that make these possibly less expensive but I think his are the best from what I have seen. less

I wear mine as jewelry. The idea is they are supposed to be symbolic. Your wedding ring more or less shows your married but the bondage cuff is more or less supposed to symbolize ownership. You essentially wear it to show that you are owned by somebody almost like you are somebodys property. I think that's why I dig it. I think the more you put into it the better. Like making the rule that you aren't allowed to take it off only he is unless its an extreme situation. I dig it because I like to consider myself "Owned" if you will. The stainless steel more or less shows that its only jewelry to you and that you feel its important to wear it because of what it represents to you as well as your "owner". And yes... its stainless steel and it can be used for restraints but just remember its straight up 3/8s or 1/4 inch stainless steel. It will not break away or be easy to open in an emergency so keep that in mind when you decide to use it for bondage play. less

Ahhh. I'm with you. They are collars just worn around the wrist or ankles A little more subtle. I like it. I'm all for ownership. It feels sexy in theory.

Your wife dresses up a lot for the office, yes? How does the ankle cuff work with her business wear? Do you guys wear them long term? less

Truth is we have not worn them recently. When we do we usually wear them for a couple of days until one of us has to do something that exposes that area of the body when it comes to the ankle.

I cant get into it really but I am into some sports where my legs are visible and I could hurt someone if I kept it on so lately I haven't worn my anklet. Not that I don't like it I am just kind of afraid of losing it taking it on and off 4 nights a week.

She doesn't wear hers if I am not wearing mine so lately we have not worn ours. But as I said before I am going to be ordering cuffs for us. Probably tomorrow... I actually just got an email from Vad at ringofsteel.net and told him we were talking about them. The cuffs are easier to take off and put back on she agrees. I think I may also have the cuffs engraved.

BTW if you have any questions Vad is very cool about answering emails. Let him know that I told you about him! I know he will appreciate it. less

'You' have a lot to learn?? Just reading the answers makes me realize I don't even know what to ask! I'm so naive, yet wanting to learn, that I think I invented the word naive.

None of the guys around here is into ANYTHING....that's why I like to come here. I can mention a slight fantasy of mine without everyone gasping in horror!

Very simple question....what is an SO? less

Oh yeah... and yes it is a collar. Just kind of a down low collar. I love the sexyness in theory also.

As far as the office goes she is very possessive of me... and she wears it almost as declaration that shes mine. I kind of keep mine hidden she sports hers out in the open. I am going to have mine engraved so it also looks like an ID bracelet.

But its a collar and I will get in trouble if it comes off unnecessarily. so it will go back on as soon as it can. less

No more naive than I, luv SO...significant other. I love hearing the fantasies! nobody judges here They are all thoughts and desires. Each of us are entitled to different kinks. It's all good.

Is there a little fantasy brewing if so, Do tell....you know we live to hear them. less