B.O.B.bing for It
So—you’ve finally decided to become a B.O.B. (Big Ol’ Bottom)? Tired of missing out on all that ass-play everyone’s talking about? Been secretly tripping on the exploits of your favorite porn stars? (“Jeez, would ya get a load of that—his hole looks like the Victory Arch in Paris, for God’s sake.”)
And now you want a piece of the action for yourself?
But wait, there’s a wrinkle. You’re a virgin—or, worse yet, there’s been an ‘Exit Only’ sign on your poop chute for so long that the mere thought of someone buggering your bunghole makes you blanch and swoon.
Doc,
I’ve been bangin’ this chick for a few months now. She’s sizzlin’ hot in the sack. Yesterday she showed up at my door with a little surprise. She whips out this strap-on and says: “Turn about is fair play.” Damn! I don’t want to lose this gal, but I’ve never given it up, if you know what I mean. She says: “No more pussy till I get some ass.”
Yeah, I think I do know what you mean. And I’m gonna go out on a limb here, stud, and guess that you’re gonna be walking real funny pretty soon. Gotta love a gal that knows what she wants—and how to get it.
Dear Dr. Dick,
Help! I want to be a bottom; at least I think I do. My boyfriend’s been begging for my booty big time, but I’m just too tight down there, and he’s really big. Our play time always end the same way, frustration for him and a pain in the ass for me. How do those porno guys do it?
First off, darling, “porno guys,” as you so lovingly refer to them, are professionals (yeah, huh!). And Dr. Dick suggests that a novice butt pirate, like you, not try all that fancy stuff at home before you know the basics.
And now you want a piece of the action for yourself?
But wait, there’s a wrinkle. You’re a virgin—or, worse yet, there’s been an ‘Exit Only’ sign on your poop chute for so long that the mere thought of someone buggering your bunghole makes you blanch and swoon.
Doc,
I’ve been bangin’ this chick for a few months now. She’s sizzlin’ hot in the sack. Yesterday she showed up at my door with a little surprise. She whips out this strap-on and says: “Turn about is fair play.” Damn! I don’t want to lose this gal, but I’ve never given it up, if you know what I mean. She says: “No more pussy till I get some ass.”
Yeah, I think I do know what you mean. And I’m gonna go out on a limb here, stud, and guess that you’re gonna be walking real funny pretty soon. Gotta love a gal that knows what she wants—and how to get it.
Dear Dr. Dick,
Help! I want to be a bottom; at least I think I do. My boyfriend’s been begging for my booty big time, but I’m just too tight down there, and he’s really big. Our play time always end the same way, frustration for him and a pain in the ass for me. How do those porno guys do it?
First off, darling, “porno guys,” as you so lovingly refer to them, are professionals (yeah, huh!). And Dr. Dick suggests that a novice butt pirate, like you, not try all that fancy stuff at home before you know the basics.
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