There are admittedly quite a few sex toys sitting in my pile of gifts, destined for my stunning girlfriend soon. When you’re in a relationship where sex toys could easily be used, on your own or with each other, there’s absolutely no reason to not give that a shot! Not your partner? Is it an old friend of yours, one with a good sense of humor? Hell yes, give them something fun! Anyone else? You’d better think twice!

When I said someone with a sense of humor who you know well- this is very important. You don’t give a dildo to a new friend. That’s creepy. You don’t give one to a family member. That’s SUPER creepy. You don’t plop the gifts for your lover, partner, spouse or even friend under the tree for general family gift opening time! Can you imagine the horrified look on their face as they open their new dong, trying to think of ideas on how to explain this to the grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins that look in on this new gift? They’re probably thinking of how to maim you with said dong.

Always try to maintain some form of tact in your gift giving, in both normal gifts and in sexual gifts. It’s an important thing to keep children and horrified elders from having too many prying questions.

You have this excellent little stack of gifts now, right? Everything for your partner, say. No one else with you, in your own living room. Get a cute outfit on. (Sexy Santa time, maybe?) You BE that sexy Santa! Hand your partner their gifts and sit on their lap a bit. Have fun with it. Make it sexy. Make it about just you two!

And remember to keep your sexy gift times well away from people who don’t want anything to do with it.