We all start getting sexually curious at some point in our lives. For most of us it's in our high school years, but for others it's sooner. Just because we have these urges sooner doesn't necessarily mean we should start acting on them. Nowadays you hear about 14 year old girls, and sometimes younger, having sex. To me that's outrageous! At the age of fourteen you're just a young girl who has barely stopped playing with her Barbie dolls and barely has any kind of idea about what you're getting yourself into. At this point young teen girls could be introduced to sex in vulgar, meaningless, and almost abusive sexual relationships (not abuse in the sense of beating but in the sense of sexual overuse, so to speak). As a young woman you're still too underdeveloped and it's easy for you to be manipulated. You may think you're grown up at the age of 14 but you are far from it.
I say even fifteen is still too young. I myself was a 15 year old girl who first had sex at a drunken college party with some 18 year old guy who disrespected me and treated me like I was dirt. The next day when I woke up and realized what I had done I felt dirty, used, and utterly disgusted with myself and my very first sexual partner. He took advantage of a drunk 15 year old and I have despised this man ever since. I always wished that I had waited a year or so before having any kind of sexual experience just because my first was so rotten. But at the age of 16 would I have been ready? No, I think not.
I do feel though, at the age of sixteen you should start to experiment with your own sexuality. I'm not saying jump on every hormone crazy teenage boy or girl you meet, but at this point in life you should've already had Sex Ed and therefore know a little about sex. But you still don't know everything. Start researching and experimenting in the comfort of your own home. The more you are acquainted with sex by the time you have it, the less likely you'll be to make rash or stupid decisions. I think it's important for young teen girls and guys to understand as much as possible. No matter what we do or say as parents, as teachers, as friends, we will never be able to stop the young population from having sex. Wouldn't you rather have young teens be informed instead of ignorant?
Knowledge gives us the tools to make our own decisions, and while we don't always make the right ones we should all at least be informed. Being introduced into sex too late can leave you feeling inadequate, unsure, and unaware. I'm not saying always but I know a few people who feel this way. Having sex too early can leave you scarred and fearful if you have the wrong experience. So, what do you think? What is an appropriate age to start being sexually active?
I say even fifteen is still too young. I myself was a 15 year old girl who first had sex at a drunken college party with some 18 year old guy who disrespected me and treated me like I was dirt. The next day when I woke up and realized what I had done I felt dirty, used, and utterly disgusted with myself and my very first sexual partner. He took advantage of a drunk 15 year old and I have despised this man ever since. I always wished that I had waited a year or so before having any kind of sexual experience just because my first was so rotten. But at the age of 16 would I have been ready? No, I think not.
I do feel though, at the age of sixteen you should start to experiment with your own sexuality. I'm not saying jump on every hormone crazy teenage boy or girl you meet, but at this point in life you should've already had Sex Ed and therefore know a little about sex. But you still don't know everything. Start researching and experimenting in the comfort of your own home. The more you are acquainted with sex by the time you have it, the less likely you'll be to make rash or stupid decisions. I think it's important for young teen girls and guys to understand as much as possible. No matter what we do or say as parents, as teachers, as friends, we will never be able to stop the young population from having sex. Wouldn't you rather have young teens be informed instead of ignorant?
Knowledge gives us the tools to make our own decisions, and while we don't always make the right ones we should all at least be informed. Being introduced into sex too late can leave you feeling inadequate, unsure, and unaware. I'm not saying always but I know a few people who feel this way. Having sex too early can leave you scarred and fearful if you have the wrong experience. So, what do you think? What is an appropriate age to start being sexually active?
I love your point about not being able to stop teens from being sexually active so it's better to make sure they are educated about it. I wrote an article recently about that, thought I like the way you worded it much better. I personally became sexually active with a partner at the age of 16 and went into it uneducated because my parents choose to tell me to wait until I was married, that was the end of that conversation. Thankfully I quickly realized the internet will help my SO and I.
As for your question about the right age? I think it depends on the person/couple. Sometimes I feel that 16 is too young so certainly no younger than that. Sex comes with responsibilities and (usually) emotional ties that the other participant just isn't up for. At 14, 15, and 16 I wasn't emotionally prepared for the attachment sex creates for some people.
Please check out my article My "No Sex" Education if you get a chance!
I was 14 and we didn't love each other but I don't regret it.
I don't think there is a single age that you can specifically say, "Yes, that's when everyone can start becoming sexually active." People are too different for that. I was ready at 14, and my experience was wonderful - it wasn't drug or alcohol induced and it wasn't a situation where I was a victim. I've never regretted becoming sexually active at 14, and I never will. My cousin, on the other hand, was 16 when she was talked into sex by her boyfriend. Two years later and she was not yet ready. But she and I are very different people.
Age is a good indicator of maturity - but it isn't foolproof. And age is not the determining factor in whether or not a person is ready to become sexually active, maturity is. The law may give a person the right to decide for themselves at 16 or 17, but even then some people are not ready. Their emotional maturity just isn't there yet. You just can't lump every person of a certain age together to determine what is good for them - age is nothing but a measure of how long a person has been out of the womb. Maturity is what matters, but unfortunately there is no easy way to measure it.
Kayletta, I definitely agree with your point but the reason I'm talking about specific ages is because mot people at young ages are no where near as mature as they need to be to experience sex the way t should be. I think you're right about the fact that it is about maturity but age is a big factor in that as well. Age, experience, maturity, they're all factors that are one in the same when you're talking about this subject.
I completely understand what you mean! kids now a days think they should do it being so young but so many of them dont understand the consequences to the actions theyre making. they dont understand how much they may regret it when they mature.