Mr. Playboy himself, Hugh Hefner, will marry Crystal Harris this Saturday, June 18, at the Playboy Mansion in Los Angeles. If you don’t have an invitation (we don’t), you’ll have to wait until July 13, 8 p.m., to watch Marrying Hef on Lifetime. Yes, we did a double-take, too. Hefner’s wedding will be the centerpiece of a two-hour “docu-special.”

The show will feature the couple’s recent trip to London to open the Playboy Club in Harris' parents' hometown; Harris' bridal shower and bachelorette party; and final decisions on her wedding gown, floral arrangements and entertainment for the event.

And we thought the Royal Wedding was exciting … Um. Kidding. At, least, as far as we know, there will be no Hefner honeymoon sex tape up for bid. Though you never know, right?

The groom is 84. The bride is 24. Harris was Playmate of the Month in December 2009. We know a lot of people roll their eyes at the age difference, but we're going to just wish them well, and hope our invitation was ... delayed in the mail. Yes, that must be it.