The American Civil Liberties Union and the U.S. Department of Justice have filed a lawsuit in South Carolina against the Hill-Finklea Detention Center in Berkeley County. Apparently, under rules regulating the use of publications bound with staples or paperclips, the only publication inmates in the prison are allowed to read is The Bible.

Naturally, the prison staff swears the strict rules aren't about religious books. They're about preventing men from having sexual thoughts while viewing porn.

“It's going to create all kinds of problems because you're going to have an issue with masturbation at that point,” said detention center co-counsel Robin L. Jackson, on the move to relax the rules. “Then, you run the risk of not just sexual assault, but physical assault because men don't want to see other men doing those types of activities.”

Wait. So masturbation leads to assault?

“If they don't like the wording in some of our policy, we'll be happy to try and create better wording. But, there are certain issues that we're just not going to be able to bend on,” said Sandra J. Senn, co-counsel for the jail.

Oh, so you're willing to pretend to change your policy? Glad we got that settled.