You Want Me To WHAT?!

My husband has always had a few movies, at that point they were VCR tapes, that he enjoyed watching while I was at work, busy or too tired to deal with having sex. I knew about them and didn't care that he watched porn occasionally. They were just a movie and nothing to be upset about--I masturbated as well when the mood hit me. He tried to get me into watching them with him but I honestly had no interest in them and when I would make an effort, was just too uncomfortable with the whole issue to even think of enjoying them or giving them a chance. For the first 8 years we were together, we had a basic "normal," satisfying, and what I thought of as adventurous, sex life.

We would decide to get naked and have fun in the car on road trips, impulsive blow jobs while traveling and all the varied positions and places that would come to mind were definitely covered! So, come on!! What else is there? How could you possibly get much better than what we already had?

The same day we bought our first DVD player, my husband decided he needed a couple of movies to go with it, since the VCR would be in the family room for the kids. With serious embarrassment, my guts quaking, I followed him into the *gasp* Adult Novelty Store. The carpet was indoor/outdoor, grey with.....oh, you have been there too? My eyes were seriously glued to the carpet and I was not looking up or at anything and just wanted to leave! As my husband completed his purchase and guided my butt to the door, he asked what I thought of -something, I am not sure what it was exactly. I just shrugged and kept right on going out the door to the safety of our truck. A couple minutes later, he followed right behind me.

Once we got away from the building and started on our way home again, the fake bravado hit me--I went into an Adult Store and lived to tell about it!! Oh, my!! What a brave girl I was. (And incredibly naive, as well!) Did I tell him it was the first time in an adult store, no...not exactly. Not yet, anyways. Just wait 'til you hear when I dropped that bomb!!

We stopped for a bottle of champagne on the way home. My husband was feeling wonderfully festive and I put it down to his new toy--get that, HIS new toy! Silly me, I had no idea what his festive and fun mood was really all about!! Once we got home, unloaded our purchases and made sure our kids were gone for the night--the real reasons for the festivities came out! We were home alone!!

Well, almost alone, there was the new DVD player and movies, but I had a system down for that, and I laughingly put on my lingerie while my hubby popped the cork. It was time to celebrate being home alone while our teenagers were gone for the night! Time for us to get naughty and have oh, so much fun with no noise restrictions.

Snuggled up, drinking our champagne and feeling more turned on as each giggle, kiss and touch happened, we finally made it to the bedroom. There was a present on my pillow, something my sneaky husband placed there when I was changing. Laughing, I picked it up, unwrapped it and...what!!?? So, the meaning of this was...*Gulp* What does he expect me to do with this...vibrator. This smelly, red, jelly ladybug vibrator that is HUGE! I looked at him, laughed a bit and told him it was funny, but next time not to spend so much on a joke.