"The inability to reach orgasm is thought to occur in about 10% of women."
The X-Orgasm. What Is It?
Before we discuss X-orgasms, we first need to locate the cervix. In case you don't already know, the cervix is located inside the vagina. You can often reach your cervix with a finger and sitting on a toilet first will allow better access. It's usually a few inches inside, but when aroused, the vaginal canal lengthens, so the cervix will be further back. Once you've inserted a finger and you suddenly come to a "block in the road," you've reached your cervix. Feeling with a fingertip will allow you to know what your cervix feels like. It's usually a round, squishy and somewhat palpable organ. It feels like a mini donut. You'll often feel a "slit" or somewhat of a hole, depending on the time of the month.
The first time I had an X-orgasm, other than during intercourse, was while my partner was thrusting with a lengthy vibrator. This is a great way to locate and begin stimulating your cervix, but first you must get comfortable with it. Once you’ve located your cervix with a finger, apply gentle pressure. This will help you know what pace to work at when you begin stimulation with a toy or your partner. The X-orgasm is more of a full-body sensation than other orgasms.
When To Stimulate The Cervix
Having this X-orgasm is not like having an extra arm or leg. You can’t just activate it whenever you please, or at least that’s not how it works for me. There are days when it works in my favor completely and I’ll have these “wild” cervical orgasms and there are days when it’s painful for my partner to bump my cervix during intercourse. I just have to take note and be aware of when my cervix is happy. This works differently than my g-spot because almost any time of day or month, my partner can work my g-spot and have me fully there. My g-spot is just always in the mood, my cervix is not.
If someone were going to go on a quest to orgasm via cervical stimulation, I would say, from my own experience, to avoid trying on the days following your menstrual cycle and possibly on days you’re ovulating. However, I’ve found that I often experience the most intense X-orgasms on the days leading up to my menstrual cycle. Some women may find cervical stimulation the most enjoyable during their actual menstrual cycle. Everyone is different.
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The reason I say you may want to avoid prodding at your cervix on days following your menstrual cycle is because those days are when your cervix (or mine, at least) is tender and stimulation can cause it to hurt rather than be pleasurable. Another thing I learned when figuring out how this works was if the opening of my cervix was very prominent, those are the times when I end up feeling pain rather than pleasure. But on days when my cervix is more closed, and I only feel a “slit” rather than a wider opening, then it’s a happy cervix day and that usually indicates it will be pleasurable.
It may even be a good idea to take note of your cervix’s position. I myself have what gynecologists refer to as a “tilted cervix". Whether or not my tilted organ has any relation to my ability to X-orgasm is beyond me.
How To Achieve An X-Orgasm
If you’re someone who thoroughly enjoys deep penetration and using lengthy toys, this could be a sign that you’re an X-orgasm-er and in that case, I’d recommend trying positions that allow for this kind of stimulation. I suppose this will differ for everybody, but I find positions like “doggy-style," or those similar to work best. While missionary position (with my legs resting on his shoulders) allows my cervix to be stimulated during intercourse, I find that the orgasm is more intense if I’m in a semi-standing, semi-bent over position. Standing up with my upper half resting on a table or bed works the best.
Unlike with the clitoris though, I don't experience pleasurable sensation from simply rubbing my cervix. My X-orgasm comes from my cervix being bumped during intercourse or with a toy. The repetitive hitting or bumping against the cervix is what produces an orgasm, for me. Don’t confuse that with vigorous pounding of the cervix please, because that will not be pleasurable! Instead, thrusting in and out and focusing on hitting the cervix gently but consistently is the key here.
Other Suggestions
You could start off by handing a toy to your partner. Have them explore with a toy because they can do so closely and have more control over the toy than they would trying to stimulate you via intercourse. Slowly inserting up to the cervix, and then backing out and gently pushing back in until you reach the cervix again will create a great pace. After this you can personally decide if you’re okay with a quicker pace.
Stimulating your g-spot to the point of orgasm (if that’s possible for you) before trying to reach cervical pleasure makes it more likely to happen. So work your g-spot first! It seems to increase my chances of having an intense X-orgasm.
Like I said, for me, neither g-spot nor cervical orgasms were forced, they just happened on surprise. I believe going into it with too much trying may make it even less likely to happen. One reason I say this is because any time I am trying to give myself an orgasm (g-spot or cervical) it does not happen!
I’ve also found other ways to also stimulate the cervix. For instance, a glass dildo can sometimes produce this X-orgasm, but that’s something you’d want to be careful with since hard materials like glass can injure your cervix. So for someone who wanted to try, I would not recommend glass for your very first, but perhaps a silicone toy like the one I used with great results.
Some will enjoy a more gentle approach, and some like me, enjoy a rougher one. But banging into the cervix is not what we’re going for. We want to gently reach it, back away and aim for it again. Treating it like a chef would a delicate dish. Let me see if this gets my point across better: think of slicing the skin off a peach. A peach is soft, but firm and its skin is delicate. If your goal was to gently remove the skin from a peach while leaving the inner fruit perfectly intact, you’d be treating it with firm, but loving care, right? Whereas if your goal is to orgasm from g-spot stimulation, you’d be applying some force and going at a fast pace, kind of digging in. Don’t gouge your cervix! It's more sensitive than the g-spot.
My Experiences
It didn’t always happen for me, but when my partner accidentally gave me a cervical orgasm, it was unlike any other sensation I’ve experienced. I was shocked to learn that most women do not orgasm during penetration! I just assumed we all did, sometimes. But when I learned that my “cervical orgasms” were a rare thing to have, I felt tremendously blessed. When I'm lying in bed at night, I quietly whisper "thank you God, for that extra pleasure spot."
You see, you have those who can orgasm from penetration and you have those who can orgasm from cervical stimulation via penetration, and of course you have the lucky ones that can have both! Some women can orgasm from penetration, but find cervical stimulation uncomfortable or painful, or for some, it does nothing at all. I’m your rare pearl here.
The “X-orgasm," just like the g-spot, is not known to exist by many women. Had I not just suddenly experienced the orgasm during intercourse, I wouldn’t have known it existed either. Unfortunately, the X-orgasm and the g-spot orgasm have something else in common – the X-orgasm is not widely talked about or studied, just how the g-spot was up until recently. And I’d bet that if we asked professional opinions on this newly found orgasm spot, we’d be told the same thing we were for years about the g-spot: it simply doesn’t exist. But also like the g-spot orgasm, those who have them know they exist and this means many more women will find that they too have this ability to orgasm from cervical stimulation.
If I've left you with questions or curiosity, I hope you'll share them with me. If it so happens you guys want more about the X-orgasm, I'm happy to oblige! I'm considering going more into detail in a separate article about the actual cervical orgasm and the feeling of it, so if you guys are interested enough, I will do that. If you have questions or comments let me know so that I can try to clear them up in that article as well. And if any of you are blessed enough to experience your own X-orgasms, do share! I'm very intrigued to learn about this orgasm from others' experience as well.