When my wife of twelve years finally accepted my suggestion that we try a sex toy, I was ecstatic. She is a very shy, reserved woman who doesn't like to go outside her comfort zone in the bedroom. She's never had an orgasm before. One night she confessed that her new best friend was able to have an orgasm every time with the help of a toy, and she wanted to try it.

I went into the research with all the enthusiasm I bring to the manliest home improvement task. I read articles, forum posts, and so many product reviews. I wasn't sure what she would need, but I did know what she would want: something that wasn't offensive to her sensibilities, or scary looking. I wasn't sure what kind of stimulation, and decided to try both clitoral and g-spot. The Posh was where I arrived for the clitoral stimulation. It was friendly-looking, had good reviews and two power settings. It also wasn't too expensive.

I was going to save it to bring out on our anniversary, but I got it out of the package and washed it just in case. I told her it was there and that if she wanted to try it out before I got to it... that just embarrassed her. But, it was probably no accident that she was very turned on all that week. We tried the little g-spot vibe first -- which didn't really do much for her, even though she was extremely aroused. The second time, I brought out the Posh -- who we now call "our little friend" -- and things went a little bit differently.

The very first time I touched her with it, I really didn't know what I was doing. With my fingers she always liked very deep pressure on her clit, and so that's what I tried, but she signaled me to back off a bit. I teased for a while and then tried holding it in place while I went inside her. This was an interesting experience for both of us! But again, not much happened. She described it afterward as "nice". I pressed her for more details and we ended up getting turned on all over again.

The next time we made love she was extremely aroused again. I was going to wait for her to tell me she wanted the toy and when I climaxed the first time she signaled for it. The moment I touched her with it, there was an electric reaction! That was so sexy, to see her move like that. I teased her and she got wetter and wetter, which was an extremely positive sign. I found a motion she liked and played around with it for a long time. Again three rounds of lovemaking that kept us up late into the night, still no climax for her, but she was happy.

Week by week, I got to know our little friend very well. And along the way I got to know my wife's needs much better. The surprise for me is how well she responds to having the Posh teased along her vulva. I can now emulate this with my tongue in a way that seems obvious now. Slowly she has come to the point that she comes very close to having an orgasm, or maybe they are just subdued orgasms, every time with the Posh -- and a couple hours of build-up, of course. She actually believes, now, that she is capable of it, which is what she's been missing all along. The Posh has given me confidence and enthusiasm I greatly needed.

Every time afterwards we talk about what worked or didn't in more certain terms than ever before. This is awesome. It's also giving me a lot more information about what to look for in our next toy. For one, I think she needs a little "deeper" vibration. I don't think this is a shortcoming in the Posh; I think it's a preference thing. For two, she mentions that sometimes the Posh feels too hot to the touch. It's very compact, and after a half hour of teasing it does build up some heat. For three, while its small size is great for portability and friendliness, it's a bit hard to hold on to, especially if you're a couple of well-padded people trying to achieve a certain position. That's not really what it was designed for, of course. For four, she definitely likes some texture on a toy. The other one was hard plastic and I think it's too inhuman. So far the Posh is perfect, but she really likes me to use it through a pair of satin panties, and so I might experiment with some other textures.