The Total Euphoria Mini-Massager is the ultimate battery-powered G-Spot massager for the poor college girl. I remember being on campus and trying to get my cash together every now and then to afford a sex toy and I could never spare more than $30. With this massager only being priced at $24.99, it's a bargain and running on AAA's it's not such a bad choice. It also makes a great toy if you're on a budget... or if you just want to try something new! I personally don't have too many issues with money right now and I was still excited to recieve this!


The Total Euphoria's seemingly sharp curve looks a bit scary, but once you try it out you'll notice that it is very forgiving for any woman's shape and size. Whether your G-Spot is shallow, or it is deep - you're bound to love this little guy! It really packs a punch that you're sure to fall in love with.


If you're not into G-Spot play, this toy would also make an excellent anal toy as it is flared and can easily be held by yourself or a partner. You could even use it as a clitoral vibrator. It lays nicely across the vulva for hands-free stimulation as you caress your body or your lover. It's all up to you!


It is a tad bit noisy, but not too awful. I wouldn't recommend it if you're looking for a toy that you would like to keep a secret or be able to use as someone sleeps in the same room or the room next to you (people with thin walls). I could tell right away that if I used this toy about 3 years ago living in my old apartment, the old folks nextdoor would be banging on the other side of my wall all night.


However, it's much more quiet than several toys I have owned in the past so I wont give it a bad wrap. It's an awesome addition to ANYONE'S collection, even the rich women who could afford all the designer toys in the world! I love it!

This massager is made of a PU coated plastic with a Velvet-Cote (trademarked coating name). It has no smell or taste whatsoever but it does soak up wet ink (pens, fresh printed papers, etc.) quite easily. I don't know if I mentioned this in the video but I set it down on a freshly printed document for just a moment so I could do something, and when I picked it up, it had soaked up some of the ink. I suppose it's the coating. I washed it and most of it came out but you can easily see the "A" and another letter that had transferred over. It doesn't bother me but it's something to think about.


The Velvet-Cote coating does not add extra stimulation, but it does help the toy glide easily across the skin, whether it be dry or wet. Some of my toys with velvety coatings get slippery with lubricant, and hard to hold; that isn't the case with this particular toy and I'm glad. So basically, it glides enough that it's easy to use and insert, but it isn't so slippery that you can't hold it. It's actually easier to hold than most velvety coated toys.


This toy is great for beginners and advanced users alike. The seemingly sharp curve is very forgiving and can easily suit any female's internal shape. I am currently going through a relapse of my Vaginismus (painful sex) and after about ten minutes, when I could relax, this toy did not cause me pain and the vibrations really helped relieve any discomfort. I love it.

I absolutely LOVE the design of this toy. The curve isn't extremely sharp like other G-Spot toys yet it is sharp enough to give you those "surprise" sensations that you're looking for in a good toy of this type. When inserted, I could immediately tell that this would be perfect for women of all shapes and sizes, whether their G-Spot be shallow or deep. I am a little deeper and this toy was perfect for me.


One thing that could have been thought out a little better (but doesn't bother me, and isn't much of a problem in my eyes) is the placement of the button. It will easily end up inside of your vagina if you have a deeper G-Spot, like myself. This means you can reach it well if you need to turn the toy off or change the vibration setting. You'll have to take it out and press it. Like I said, it's not an issue to me because I know what setting I like and there's really no reason that I'd have to suddenly turn it off.


The length of the toy is about an inch smaller than my hands (It is 5.75" long) so it can easily be stored inside of a sock, toy pouch, jewelry box, etc. It is much smaller than I had expected it to be because the product page makes it look so fat and long. It is very small and quite the opposite, but still packs a punch! So yes, the toy itself is discreet and very suitable for travel.

The Total Euphoria Mini-Massager has 2 vibration levels and 1 pulsation mode. They are all activated by the push of the button on the center of the toy, and you simply cycle through each mode.


Starting with your toy being powered off, you press the button...

1. Medium vibration, 2 bees, 2 vrooms

2. Medium/High vibration, 3 bees, 3/4 vrooms

3. Pulsation mode, Medium/High vibration, 3 bees, 3/4 vrooms


Press it once more and the toy powers off. Very simple to use. I prefer the pulsation mode because it feels stronger since it goes from off to on over and over. Very pleasureful on either of the modes, though.


The vibrations are located in the head of the toy (the G-Spot side, smaller end) and travel somewhat up the neck of the toy... A little past where the button is located. This is a plus if you have a sensitive clitoris, because you can angle the toy so that it touches your clitoris (which is easy since the shaft is somewhat curved) and you can get some clitoral stimulation as you stimulate the G-Spot.


The toy was perfectly fine when I ran water over it to give it a wash, and I actually used it while laying in the bath tub, so it got splashed several times. There is an O-Ring around the battery compartment to keep it waterproof. The package says "Works in or out of the water". I don't recommend submerging it simply because it is a thin O-Ring, and my toys with thin O-Rings always seem to break when submerged. However, it's a great shower/bath toy as long as it isn't deep in the water.

This toy is made of plastic, so it can easily be used with water and silicone-based lubricants. I prefer to stick with water to avoid wearing down the O-Ring in case some slips in the seam. The O-Ring feels like silicone. I know it is rare that this event may happen but just in case, I'm personally sticking with water.


This toy is small enough to be stored basically anywhere. If you're unsure of how to store it, you could keep it in a sock, a toy pouch, or even keep the plastic shell insert to protect it and put it in a jewelry box. I keep mine in a toy box. You want to be sure that it doesn't fall or get submerged in water, so keeping it up high or in a drawer would be best.


You can easily wash this toy with warm water and antibacterial soap or a toy cleaning spray/wipe. I like to use antibacterial soap, only because some cleaning wipes/sprays are not antibacterial. Germs are a big deal to me.

The package is not at all discreet in my opinion. For one, it shows the toy on the back, the side, and the toy is visible from the front when packaged up. It also says "intimate pleasure" and "intimate massager". So if you have family, children, etc. you may want to open this in private to avoid any issues.


There were no instructions at all with my toy. I'm not sure if there were supposed to be, but that surely would have helped. I had no idea which end to put the batteries in (there are two visible seams that looked like they could easily hold a battery or two, so it was confusing). I finally figured out (after like ten minutes) that the battery goes in the longer end. There are two symbols ( a "+" and a "-") to show the direction of the batteries upon insertion.


The package, I suppose, could be used when giving as a gift. However, you're obviously going to want to wrap it. As for storage, the plastic shell or even the entire box could be used if discretion is not an issue. The shell especially could be helpful so that the toy is not damaged.


The entire package is made of plastic and is recyclable.

My experience with the Total Euphoria Mini-Massager was awesome. As most of you know, I'm going through an awful relapse of Vaginismus. It's hard to use basically all of the toys I currently own. The Mini-Massager is slim enough to give me painless entry after my vagina relaxes (you have to give it time to relax) and the vibrations are helping me get used to being penetrated again.


It's powerful for such a small, battery-operated toy, and it is very pleasureful. I had 2 orgasms using this toy by itself for the first time, and later in the evening I used it again for about 30 minutes and had 6 orgasms with the use of a clit vibe as well. It's not EXTREMELY powerful, since it is battery-operated, but the angle it has sends all the power to the right place, making it perfect.