The Eilium is a tiny little bullet vibrator house in a removable silicone sleeve that looks like a cute tentacle monster crossed with a baby pink radish. The bullet itself sits in the teardrop side, cushioned in lots of smooth silicone and there is a long, very flexible arm extending from the end. Overall the Eilium is around six inches long, with the thicker end being about 2.5” long. You can hold the thicker side against yourself for stronger stimulation with added pressure, just like a normal bullet in a body-safe sleeve. However, the arm is super flexible, which really only makes it suitable for very light teasing and tickling of sensitive areas - it can’t be used as a handle. I also wouldn’t recommend it for insertion as the bullet isn’t waterproof. You probably won’t have a great need of lube with this toy, but if you do choose to use it make sure it’s water-based to ensure it won’t react with the silicone sleeve.

A few hours before sitting down to write this review I had pretty much concluded that the so called ‘removable’ bullet really wasn’t going to come out of its sleeve. Over the previous days I’d tried gentle squeezing and tugging with my fingers at first, working up to my teeth and a pair of needle-nose pliers as I got more frustrated and desperate. Yes, seriously, pliers. After squishing my finger in the pliers by mistake, resulting in a blister, then nearly chipping a tooth, I thought about giving up. Yet, finally, today I managed to slide the pliers down the sides of the sleeve and sort of lever it out slowly. It wasn’t easy and it’s certainly not something I want to do again, especially not each time I want to clean this toy. If you do manage to take it out you can boil/bleach the silicone to sterilize it or wash it with soap and water, but if the bullet stays in you could just wipe it down with toy cleaner instead.

Though I didn’t expect much from the Eilium’s mini size, the vibrations really were a let down. In the thicker end where the bullet is housed they don’t even match the lowest setting of my bullet vibes powered by AAA batteries. Through the tickling arm? You practically get the same amount of sensation just dragging it along the skin gently, without the bullet being on. These are improved if you only half insert the bullet, so more of it is in contact with the arm. This is perfect for the lightest sort of teasing imaginable, but if you use anything with stronger vibes anywhere else, be prepared for the weak vibrations you feel through this arm to go unfelt. When the bullet is out of the sleeve the vibrations are improved, but honestly you’d be better off with a stronger wireless bullet if that’s what you were looking for, as it’s also really hard to hold. The plus side to this tiny bullet is that it’s extremely quiet - practically inaudible at arm’s length.

Part of this problem with vibration strength can be explained when/if you manage to get the bullet out of the sleeve. It’s really small, like ‘I’ve swallowed bigger capsules than this’ sort of tiny, measuring in at 1.25”. Maybe I’m just not used to bullet vibes that run on minuscule batteries, but it even seemed small for the size of the sleeve overall. So first of all, it can’t kick out a whole lot of power on two G-3 A watch batteries, which is to be expected. However, the manufacturers didn’t really help this problem by making the sleeve around it thicker than the diameter of the bullet itself! Though silicone generally conducts vibrations pretty well, when this tiny little bullet is housed in a chunk of silicone double its size, it’s no wonder you can’t get much power out of it. Similarly, when you have this problem directly around the bullet, it’s not surprising that all the solid silicone soaks up the vibrations before they can really get to the end of the tickling arm. Overall it’s a cute design with lots of potential, but sadly it just doesn’t deliver as well as it could.