When I was first assigned this review, I immediately ran to the stats, and then blinked in puzzled silence. How could a veiny, dual-stim vibe that “rotates, vibrates, escalates, and pulses” possibly, simply, ‘tease’? I suppose that would depend on a person’s libidinous desires, as I certainly would not have labeled mine a ‘tease’ were I given the choice…

Made of fragrance-free, slippery TPR, the Impulse Diva Teaser|Impulse diva teaser is simple to care for, but not wholly hygienic. It’s best not to share it without protection of some sort. I’ve used soap and water with it, and toy cleaner. If you’re quite concerned about hygiene, it may be best to put a condom on this toy – however, I personally don’t find it necessary, since I do not share my toys, and I think that maintaining toy hygiene is enough for the ‘somewhat’ porous TPR. This is, however, a personal call. If in doubt, naturally, err on the side of caution.

The shaft is mostly clear, with blue accents and veining that seem to me oddly reminiscent of a forest stream. Since the shaft is rather modest in length and girth, as well as being strangely slick AND gummy, it’s extremely comfortable for thrusting, and the rippling veins undulating against you is intriguing in its own frictionless, gentle way – however you generally lose track of the veins once you turn it on, as all the vibrations this toy produces are powerful.

The shaft has tumbling pearls (which I love), but the three built in rotation speeds are not easy to differentiate. For me, all three speeds are just too similar, and since you must click through each speed to turn it off, I often get ‘lost’ trying to figure out what measure of stimulation I want the shaft to provide. I think I eventually settled on the highest speed, just so it’d be easy to turn off.

Also, it was easy for me to clench my muscles and stop the rotations entirely. I personally really enjoy doing kegels while I masturbate, so I had to curb that practice if I wanted the shaft to continually rotate, and I normally do, since I quite like the feeling. That aside, I did find it mildly amusing to use it and kegel, because there’s something a little empowering about being able to stop a sex toy with your cunt alone, but maybe that’s me. :x

The ‘rabbit’/bullet is, thankfully, NOT anthropomorphic. I don’t know, maybe I’m a pansy, but I’m not much for getting myself off with a cute animal shape. I *can*, mind, I just prefer not to. Ahem. Instead of the vaguely suggested dolphin (I was afraid it was going to be a dolphin, eh heh), you are greeted instead by a simple TPR covered bullet with a beaky point poking out of it.

The ‘butterfly’/bullet is sort of alarmingly intense for me. It starts strong, escalates two steps above that, roller coasters, pulses very fast, stair steps, and then there’s a seventh step that’s also steady, but I can’t tell if it’s stronger than the other three steady vibes or not. Even at the lowest setting, turning on the bullet makes me jump and gasp from shock. It looks a little like my vibe just shouted, “Boo!” at me, however it’s not the noise that made me jump, it’s the sensation.

For all its power, the Impulse Diva Teaser is actually surprisingly quiet. Not *quiet*, mind, but it is quite easily muffled and I’m fairly sure a closed door could easily block it out.

I find the general ergonomics of the Impulse Diva Teaser to be standard, it doesn’t really throw anything new out there to help out your wrists during use, but neither does it suffer any truly silly design flaws. My only quibble is, since it’s operated by two buttons that feel identical to me in the throes of the moment, sometimes I’ll accidentally adjust the wrong setting and have to start all over again.

The Impulse Diva Teaser is also waterproof, and while I did not actually play with it in the bath or shower I did run it under water, just to see if it’d continue to function, and had no issues after several minutes of watching it vibrate and squirm in my hands. Veerrry interesting! I’m going to have to give it a real run, one day.

In short, the Impulse Diva Teaser is not quite a fit, for me. While “it’s too strong!” isn’t really a proper negative for a toy… it’s, just too strong for me. It’d be a good match for someone who craves a hard, powerful vibe to rub against their clit, and also wants some extra motion from the shaft. I, personally, have to be in the mood for it, and need a little warm up before hand.

As I apparently seem to have a tender clit, I had to get a bit creative with this rather powerful vibe. So, here are a few ways I found to make it work for me:

...Using the ‘butterfly’/bullet externally, with the entire vibe reversed and no penetration, caused the vibrations to diffuse enough for it to become very comfortable.

...Using the toy without the bullet but with the tumbling rotating pearl shaft, essentially like using a dildo with the perk of rotation. Since I’m quite fond of dildos anyways, it felt good.

...Using the vibrations briefly and then lifting the bullet away.

...Lifting the beaky point of the ‘butterfly’/vibe up so that the point does not rest on me, but rather the lower length of the bullet-shaft rested on me, instead of the point.