Russian Torpedo Fail

Russian weapon of pleasure? More like cheap, crappy worthless plastic toy. I would NEVER buy this toy! EVER. I'm glad it was a free gift. The only good thing was; I got a kick out of what the packaging had to say.
Published:
Pros
The funny wording on the package
Cons
Everything Else
Rating by reviewer:
1
extremely useful review
"Foreign style, high tech weapon-- unique enjoyment- With Russian Man's energy and body and the shape of torpedo added with the powerful motor. It is ready to dig the deep of the lady. The vibrator focuses its energy in one area, although it seems a little hard it can be rubbed quite firmly. It can give Lady the special feeling, take Lady to the deluxe and sexy world"
That quote from the package is the best thing about the product. Russian weapon of pleasure? More like a cheap, crappy worthless plastic toy. If the unique enjoyment is a big pain in the ass, then they got that one right.

This will not be a toy I will ever be using again. Just from taking it out of the package, I knew that it wasn't worth anything. It felt cheap, and I had a SUPER hard time even getting the cap off to put batteries into it. It took me a good 5 to 10 minutes to get the cap off; that's an issue right there! I couldn't get the batteries in right and it took forever to close it. BIG waste of time.

Is it as loud? Yes, probably the loudest toy I have ever had. If you want everyone to know what you're doing, then this is the toy for you.
One would think with something that vibrates THAT loud, it would at least have GOOD vibration... it doesn't. It had NO vibration what so ever. Did nothing for me; at all.

This torpedo doesn't go in the water, it IS NOT waterproof.

It can be stored anywhere, there is no need to worry about lint getting on the hard plastic.

Don't buy this toy. Really, I mean it. Don't buy it. It's a HUGE waste of money and a HUGE waste of time.
Follow-up commentary
Don't ever buy this, it's awful. I ended up throwing it away. It wasn't even good enough to keep in the toy box.
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This review was edited by
  • wetone123 Contributor: wetone123
  • Rank:
    6.4 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 212
Comments
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  • Contributor: TransMarc
    Ah, thankfully it was free! Not asking for that with my own buys. Thanks for the review
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