The Ravenous Rabbit does not have a mustache, does not wear a monocle, and does not say things like 'ostentatiously' or 'prodigious'. It is a straight-forward, bread-and-butter rabbit vibrator that has no illusions of grandeur or big, elaborate plans. It's got more girth than the average plastic vibrator with the added bonus of having a little somethin' for the external lady bits that could use a little love.

It can be used traditionally inserted with the rabbit ears stimulating the clitoris, or if you're feeling frisky, you can pop a 180 on this biznatch and see what the ears can do for your backdoor!

Jelly. This thing smells, tastes, and attracts lint like good ol' jelly does. It came out of the package with a downright nasty, thin sheen of mystery coating that needed to be washed off (you should probably be washing your toys out of the package anyway...just sayin'!), but I haven't had any issues with it since.

There are virtually no surprises here, nothing that's going to pop out at the last second and say, "What's up, vagina? I've got something for you!" It's got a soft feel while still retaining firmness, but frankly the texture is about as uninteresting as the subtle texture of paint on the wall. It's got a subtle spiral-like texture that is not really prominent enough to be felt.

In terms of design, this is your average rabbit vibrator in terms of the one-two design of vibrator + clit extension. The girth was surprisingly bigger for such a basic rabbit vibrator, but it was not unmanageable. The insertable length is certainly reasonable, but I often found that taking too much of it at once made it impossible to keep the rabbit ears situated on my clit at the same time. All vaginas are shaped differently, so your mileage may vary, but do note that this may not be the ideal toy if you enjoy a fair amount of thrusting, as it makes the rabbit ear portion very difficult to control.

The controls are located at the base of the toy and consist of four buttons with two functions each: one button to turn the shaft rotation on/off, another to change the direction from clockwise to counterclockwise, one to turn the vibrations on/off, and another to switch the vibrations from low to high.

The vibrations are focused primarily in the tip of the shaft, but unfortunately does not translate well further down the shaft towards the base. However, they are quite strong in the tip, so this was not a big issue for me and I still found it to be fairly powerful on the high setting, surprisingly so for such a basic rabbit vibrator. The bullet located in the rabbit ear extension is also respectably powerful, though the rabbit ears are melded together (unlike other rabbit vibes, whose ears can nestle on either side of the clitoris), so the stimulation is pretty concentrated.

As for the rotation, I am not going to be shy about expressing that I am thoroughly unimpressed by the power of that particular feature. There were times where I was sure my hand was the only thing rotating when the vibrator was inserted fully, and the rotation was so subtle when I did try to pause and focus on it that it was more or less negligible. The noise of the motor alone is akin to masturbating with a hair dryer (try not to imagine it) and I couldn't turn my music up loud enough to mask the sound without it sounding like a house party during my solo time. If it takes you more than ten minutes or so to finish your business, forget about it -- you're more likely to have a police officer knocking on your door for a noise violation first. Three layers of blanket weren't enough to even remotely mask the noise, either.

The good news is, it is much quieter when the rotation is not in use. It has only a slight hum that can be much more easily masked, but unfortunately it kind of puts the kibosh on using one of its only unique features.

The controls are extremely touchy, so beware if traveling with this vibrator in particular. I would recommend removing the batteries, as any slight bump will turn it on and make for some rather awkward moments in the airport or at Grandma's house. I've accidentally turned it on while trying to put it away in storage in my bedroom and have occasionally changed the settings and turned it on/off during use.

This toy is not waterproof, so take care not to submerge the controls/battery panel at the bottom when cleaning. I personally tilt the toy downward under the sink to minimize the risk of water entering the battery compartment. It is otherwise incredibly easy to clean with soap and warm water or your toy cleaner of choice. This toy is compatible with water or silicone-based lubricants.

Just as a note of caution, this toy can and will pick up every piece of hair, lint, and general crud it is exposed to. Dry with a paper towel or a non-shedding cloth and store right away in a clean place to avoid immense frustration.

Overall, as my first foray into rabbit vibrators, this was not the best toy ever, but I recognize that it also could've been worse. The touchy controls were a source of frustration at times and the negligible rotation function more or less made this a glorified vibrator with a clit attachment that only sometimes actually nestled over my clit well enough for me to feel it. It also lacks the rotating beads at the base that many other rabbit vibes offer, which I feel could've made up a bit for the absence of vibration at the base of the shaft. Even if I had enjoyed the rotation aspect, the noise of the motor alone is enough reason for me to rarely, if ever, turn it on.

Regardless, I was fairly pleased with the power of the vibrations and the overall length and girth of the toy, which was slightly bigger than most standard vibrators, and when the rabbit ears hit just right, they were definitely on the mark.