The best use for this "vibrator" is to not buy it at all. That right there should set the tone for this review, because I can't even believe they charge $27.99 for this. This will not tease anybody but the absolute most sensitive women, the women who can spread their legs during a good stiff breeze and feel some pleasure. Are they out there, do they exist? Screaming O seems to think so. I can't even feel anything when applied to my nipple for petes sake.

It is marketed as a discreet vibrator that looks like a makeup brush.

No. Just...no. From 50 paces? Maybe.

Nowhere on the box does it say what the bristles are made out of. The handle and the ribbed portion just below the fake bristles is ABS plastic. So I went to their website where they claim that it is "PHTHALATE FREE SOFT SILICONE FLEX-TIP FOR FOCUSED VIBRATION".

It's not pure silicone. It failed the silicone flame test, the bristles melted. There is some silicone content to it because at first it went all ashy, but brush away the grey ash and you should see no harm done if it was pure platinum/medical grade silicone. Instead you see deformed bristles. Therefore, this isn't non-porous and I don't know what other material it is mixed with. It feels like rubber.

Overall it's small, 4.5" long. This thing isn't travel-friendly unless you remove the little watch-style batteries - to turn it on you just click the button, you don't have to hold it for a few seconds. So it can get turned on if it's in your purse if you left the batteries in.

The design just "screams" (pardon the pun) DIFFICULT TO CLEAN! You'd have to wash this off right away otherwise getting the lube and fluids off when they dry would be a nightmare. And I'm betting that if you're using this in the "discreet" way they advertise, you're not in a place where you can wash off your brush.

This will not deliver targeted, pinpoint stimulation at all. If I would be very, very generous I could say that it delivers diffuse stimulation. I don't find the texture of the soft, short rubber bristles to be pleasurable on my clit or labia. It is wider across than your average "pocket rocket" at the bristles.

Fluttering fairy wings would produce more vibration than this toy. In fact, I'm betting some children's toys would produce more vibration than this. I don't know what children's toys vibrate or for what purpose, but anything is better than this.

At the first two levels you can barely discern that the bottom, outer-most row of rubber bristles are vibrating. At the third level, adorably called "High", the second most outer tow of bristles will vibrate. The center will never truly vibrate.

The handle, the red portion, seems to have the most vibrations but what would be the point of that? Even those vibrations are barely felt.

The single push-button at the bottom is easy enough to use. There is 3 levels of breeze and then 1 pulsating function.

For as wimpy as the vibrations are, you would expect it to truly be "whisper quiet", but it is not. The noise of the vibrator actually is surprising when you then find out that nothing is happening. You could not use this, say....in a public toilet. It would be heard loud and clear. You know those little slimline electric razors that are everywhere? It sounds like that. So you could try to say you're um, shaving...but....why?

I have owned over 125 sex toys, so I can say this with confidence: I've never held a vibrator that vibrates less than this thing.

Yes, they include batteries, 2 sets. Which is good because it uses watch batteries, possibly the most hated in all of vibrator-reviewer land. Lr44 Button Cells, despite the box saying AG13, whatever those are.

I can't even imagine cleaning this if you left it go until later. The rubber bristles make this not so easy to clean unless you have running water. Luckily it is waterproof, however please don't pull much on these bristles. They're not glued on to the top very well, and they're not glued around the edge. Just around the center. It easily popped off for me, and so I don't know then how this affects the waterproof-ness. When the bristles pop off they can be put back on - there is a nub that sticks up. This part, actually, vibrates the most out of any part. I'd be tempted to tell you to just yank off the bristles if you want to feel anything.

The packaging is...weird. Half blister-pack design, half box. It makes you wonder how you'll get it open without ripping the box. Not like that would matter, you won't be keeping the box. But still. I was able to pull out the plastic portion and the vibrator from the bottom of the box and keep the box intact. There is no included storage option here, but there should be. The bristles hang onto dust/lint/fur/etc. If you tossed this into your makeup bag or purse you would pull it out to find that the bristles are filthy. Unless you WANT a sparkly vulva, you should find a bag to store this in if you actually do buy it.

The package doesn't tell you the materials. That REALLY irks me.

I love the choice phrases on the back of the box, which is why I included a photo of it. "Shh! No one will ever know your secret!" HAhahahaha. Right. The text on the back of the box is the extent of the "user manual".

I know I included a lot of photos, and I don't know how people will feel about that.

Giving this a Vroom rating of even 1 feels like I'm being generous.

"Breaking" the vibrator (sort of, it still works) by popping off the rubber bristle cap has revealed why it is So Weak. Anybody can tell you that if you hold a vibrator (bullets and eggs are most obvious) in your hand tightly, the vibration strength will usually decrease because the motor is not powerful enough to shrug off the throttling. The Screaming O Brush's vibrating "nub" is the portion that has the most vibrations, but they are muffled to a far-away whimper when the surprisingly solid rubber cap is put over it. There's about 1/4" inch of solid rubber from base to tip of the bristles and about the same from center to side. That's a lot of rubber that the vibrations have to travel through. It's no wonder they're so weak!

EF's image inclusion function won't let me have thumbnails and I'm not putting the full-size photos here. So I've included the thumbnails that EF creates for the product page, and after each is a link to the full size version.


View full size (Top of the brush)


View full size (Front of the box)


View full size (Side of the box)


View full size (handle)


View full size (Back of the box)


View full size (Melted bristles/failed flame test)