Oh, Pocket Blaster. It's not you, it's me. I'm at a time in my life where I'm looking for more than a faint clitoral buzz. I'm no good for you, anyway; I'm way too demanding. I crave the excitement that only strong, variable vibrations can provide. With a name like Pocket Blaster, I guess I was just expecting... well, to have a blast.

Even though you and I didn't really have fun together, I'm sure there's a very petite girl out there, maybe a beginner, who might get turned on by your three inches of shaft and your nickle-sized girth. If she's new to vibrators, your gentle vibrations might be just the thing to get her to come out of her shell. Perhaps she'd even like to experiment with your g-spot attachment... but me? I just wasn't feeling it. We never really came close to connecting.

Remember the night we tried to make it happen? I just couldn't get a grip. Your texture was so smooth that I had trouble holding on to you. And you were so sensitive, if I even held you the wrong way you flipped your lid and came undone! It really killed the mood for me.

Don't be so down on yourself, though! You have plenty going for you! I'll miss your hypoallergenic material, your lack of odor and taste. How you were quiet enough that others couldn't hear us from the next room. Oh, and what an inexpensive date! Just one AA battery? C'mon, I'm sure there are lots of girls who are looking for someone a little lighter on their budget. See? You've got good qualities!

You were so low maintenance: neat and easy to clean with toy cleaner or just soap and water. It's too bad I couldn't take you in the shower with me--not that I could've held on to you, you slippery little devil!

I think it's better that I let you go. Can we just be friends?

I've used this toy three times now and only come at its touch once. Just to get enough experience to review, I had to almost sacrifice some fun time to do it. This toy quickly became "foreplay only." The head will not stay on unless you sort of pinch it between your fingers; just be careful, because the top will unscrew easily. The AA battery runs out quickly, but since you're only using one at a time, it's not such a big deal to change them more often. I'd say this is best used without the attachment as a quick "buzz" to get someone started.