Just...no.

I got this solely because it was a free gift with my order a few months ago. I never actually bothered to take it out until now, just out of curiosity. Well, it's not something I would typically go for and I have more issues with it than things that I like about it. I don't think this will be in my toy collection for very long.
Published:
Pros
Multiple settings and speeds
Cons
Price, LOUD, too many batteries for a bullet, buttons can be easily pushed
Rating by reviewer:
1
extremely useful review

Use

This is a corded remote bullet vibrator by Cal Exotics for Eden Fantasys. It is intended for external stimulation, so clitoris, nipples, or wherever else you'd like. If you wanted to use if for shallow vaginal penetration, that could be done. Although it has a cord, I would not recommend it for anal use, that just seems risky to me. This could be used for couples, or solo. If you wanted to give this to a bachelorette is part of a gift basket, you could. It is not travel friendly, since it has no way of locking the toy so it doesn't just turn on. There is no off or on button, if you press the button to turn it the vibration speeds it will turn on. And let me tell you, those buttons are easy to press. Nobody wants to walk around with a vibrating purse.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Bachelor/ bachelorette party
    • Couples
    • Solo
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Clitoris
    • External parts
    • Nipples

Material / Texture

This toy is made from plastic, so it's not the safest there is. I exclusively buy silicone toys, as they are easiest to sterilize, but again, this was a free gift. It's about an 8 on the Eden Safety Scale. It is very rigid and smooth, no texture to it at all. You can use any sort of lubricant with this, since it's plastic, and it shouldn't damage it.
    • Smooth

Design / Shape / Size

This is a beginner toy. This is very much a beginner toy. I don't think too many advanced users would like it very much. It is not discreet visually, you can completely tell what it is. The remote could make partner play fun and easy, if you just give your partner the cord and let them control the vibrations. The shape of the bullet itself isn't really impressive. There is no point on it or shape to it, it is not really able to pinpoint certain spots. It is very rounded, pretty much a cylindrical oval sort of shape. The bullet does have a seam that goes in, all around the length of the middle. That could get gross, no matter how well you clean it. Plus, this toy is not waterproof, so that makes cleaning that more of a challenge.

The remote is easily fits into the palm. It is small, at 4" long, but fits in the hand with room to control the buttons with your thumb. The bullet itself is about 3" long, with a circumference of about 3". The cord is 30", so that gives you a bit of room to work with.
    • Beginner
    • Partner play

Functions / Performance / Controls

This bullet has 3 buttons. Two are arrows, which are pushed to turn the vibration speed higher or lower, or to turn the toy on altogether. The F button is used to go though the vibration patterns.


There are 10 speeds to this toy, and the higher you turn it up, the louder it gets. And this thing is loud and buzzy! It's not quiet in the first place, but it just gets louder and louder when you turn it up. There are red LED lights that light up with each of your selections, for both speed and pattern.


At it's strongest, the vibrations are about a 3, maybe a 3.5 on the vroom scale, but they are very buzzy. Not deep vibrations at all. The first vibration pattern is a steady vibration. The second is a rollercoaster pattern, which goes from low to high,then drops from high to low. The third is sort of an escalating pattern. The last two are different pulsating patterns. Each of them is very loud, and very buzzy. This could easily be heard under covers, and through a door depending on how high you have the bullet and how quiet your room is.

This bullet takes 3 AAA batteries, which I find to be off-putting. My Ako only takes 2, and it is a lost better and quieter than this. For a regular bullet/egg vibrator to take 3 AAA batteries is crazy to me, it seems like such a waste. Not to mention, that this this doesn't have an actual off button. You just turn the speed down until the lights go off, then it's off. To me, that is a sign that this could be a real battery guzzler.
    • Battery guzzler
    • Multiple settings
    • Not discreet at all

Care and Maintenance

The bullet itself is pretty easy to clean, except around where the cord connects to the bullet. It is nothing but ridges, so you really need to take care to clean in those crevices in the cord, fluids would definitely get in there. Soap and water would do to clean it. You could use toy wipes, but that would not get in those crevices on the cord or the seam that runs across the middle of the bullet.

As for storage, like I said, the buttons can get pressed and the toy can turn on, not to mention that it seems like it would be a battery guzzler anyway. Because of that, I would take the batteries out before storing it. To me, this isn't worth the hassle of the extra measures to clean or store it.
    • Hard to clean
    • High maintenance

Packaging


The packaging was a plastic bag, with the name of the toy on it in bold black text. Very basic, no instructions included, not that they're really needed since the toy is easy to figure out. There wouldn't really be a point to keeping this bag for storage; it doesn't even have a zipper seal or anything, you have to tear it open.
    • Minimal
    • Not discreet

Personal comments

I got this as a free gift, with my order over $70. However, the price of this, if you were to buy it, is $35.99. THIS IS NOT AT ALL WORTH THAT. AT ALL. You could get a much better toy for less. Better material, better quality, quieter, all of it; all around better things are on the market for equal or lesser value. I would advise against purchasing this, I really don't see how it's worth it. The PicoBong Ako, easily my most-used toy, is not much more expensive than this at $39. Mind you, that is quiet, silicone, great for external stimulation, no cord, and only 2 AA batteries; not to mention it has plenty of settings and power. I would just recommend getting that, it's in the same price range but it's so much better than this toy in every way.
Follow-up commentary
There isn't much for me to say about this, other than it's not worth it. Don't like it, went in the trash shortly after this review.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com

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Comments
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  • Contributor: Falsepast
    Thanks for the pics
  • Contributor: Sweet-n-Playful
    Great review, thanks
  • Contributor: Stinkytofu10
    Great review, thank you!
  • Contributor: married with children
    great review, thanks for sharing.
  • Contributor: Archery
    Great review!
  • Contributor: pussy licker
    Thanks for the review
  • Contributor: lainebug
    thanx
  • Contributor: GONE!
    Thanks for the review, and happy holidays!
  • Contributor: AwesomeAmanda
    thank you!
  • Contributor: Harpina is gone
    Thanks
  • Contributor: Pudyqat
    thanks
  • Contributor: Zandrock
    Good review
  • Contributor: Lovely Jubblies
    Great review. I'll definitely skip this one
  • Contributor: LavenderSkies
    Thanks for the photos!
  • Contributor: ththpup
    I'll pass on this.
  • Contributor: quackbuster
    Great review! Was curious about this & thinking about placing an order to get it, but I think I'll pass. Three batteries seems excessive.
  • Contributor: Real or memorex
    Thanks. This helped me decide about this toy - it sounds like you didn't really enjoy it even as a freebie.
  • Contributor: PassionCpl
    Thanks for the excellent review and pics
  • Contributor: sunflower
    Thank you. Too bad it's buzzy. I think the control panel looks like it would be really neat if the vibrations were better. And wtf, 3 AAAs? Doesn't look great.
  • Contributor: Carrot
    thank you for your review, i was about to buy this but i think i'll look into it a little more now.
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