I bought a toy a few years ago that looked very similar to this and frankly, it burned me out on the whole concept for a long time. It did practically nothing for me. I loved the idea, but it didn't vibrate much, didn't feel that great, and figuring out how to adjust the straps for optimum clit-contact was like playing that yarn game, Cat's Cradle. But, as the old yarn goes, that was then and this is now. What they mean by that is even though the first cell phone you owned had to be hauled around in a wheelbarrow, now they fit in your pocket and it's worth making friends just so your skirt will vibrate when they call.

If I had access to farm animals and cotton candy, I'd haul in the former and hand out the latter just to make like a state fair and blue-ribbon this toy. (Unfortunately, apartment management disallows goat herding on the premises.) If Cinderella had owned this toy, she'd want nothing more than to sweep the floors because doing bendy stuff makes it feel real aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

If you own a Wii Fit, or maybe you're just a fanatic who does yoga at home while NOT staring at television output of an animatronic character also doing yoga, even though that animatronic character has a rather obvious pouch that looks particularly yummy when he bends certain ways, which overall has a large motivating effect towards getting me off my duffer and actually exercising, this toy would be dee! lish! us! pushed up against nudgenudgewinkwink THERE while you, say, tried to do Downward Facing Dog, so absorbed in the sensation that for once you forgot to even giggle at the name of the pose.

Some other activities this toy would enhance your enjoyment of: computer work, other work that involves sitting, work that involves standing, work that involves other positions, things that involve being in any position ranging from sitting to not sitting. (While not loud, it’s also not quiet enough to manage that discreetly near others, however, but you could have it installed in your panties for the contingency that they should wander off when you, say, yell FIRE. How would they know you meant your crotch was on fire?)

People that are NOT good candidates for this toy: women who hate when their clitoris feels really, really good. Constant use of toy may result in embarrassing whispering by one's coworkers that they're "good and aware" of where that buzzing sound is coming from, and "frankly, that Jane's always been just a little too happy but this is just ridiculous."

But, what goes up must come down. The straps are still a bit of effort. It took me awhile to figure out what they'd intended to go where and I'm still not entirely convinced it's as they intended but it feels good, dammit. Funny thing is, the last vibrator I got was as simple as can be (stabby end and turny-offy-end), yet came with extensive instructions in 800 dialects of Chinese, but this thing just came with a tiny slip of paper that indicated how to insert the batteries, which was already indicated within the battery compartment. (Just as well, because the strap instructions would read like instructions for putting together furniture from Ikea. Tab C goes in Slot B over Thigh A. ‘Course, would a picture of it correctly installed have killed them?)

PLEASE NOTE: The packaging shown on the product page does indeed show a pic of it in place, even though the packaging I received does not. The product pictured is slightly different than the product shipped: the material is softer (jelly, not hard plastic as shown), the remote is different and slightly larger, and the straps are pink.

I suppose we only hurt the ones we love...and so it goes with the Venus Butterfly and I. Oh she, she was a delicate gelatinous angel, my winged fragile lover, and though she did nothing but give me pleasure, I wrenched her straps and through her wings they pulled. Now she lays there like a sad lifeless thing, wanted to cleave to my clit but unable. At times I still force her to pleasure me by sitting on her just so but...well, the guilt...