I loved the 7 function wireless remote egg by Doc Johnson; for the week or so that it worked for me, that is.

First, the good: the nicely-sized egg (shouldn't be too big for anyone, but not so small that it easily slips out) is a velvety-textured plastic of a beautiful fuchsia color. The seven functions- low, medium and high vibrations, plus four patterns - are lovely, the lowest one being just a pleasantly arousing reminder of its presence that I enjoyed one evening all the way through dinner and drinks.

The low vibration was also a good internal complement to masturbation, leading to some delightful orgasms. The high vibration, on the other hand, was very intense. When inserted deeply and topped off with a dildo, this little egg vibrator had my whole body vibrating!

I liked using the 7 function egg externally on my various spots of my pussy, mostly for a teasing effect, and it felt good on my nipples, but I did not get to explore this toy to its maximum potential due to the short battery life.

And now, the not-so-good: the egg stopped working after about a week. However, I would like to mention that I wasn't easy on it and it was thoroughly used.

Such vibrators are actually recommended for external use only (although, really, who buys one of these for external use?), and that is something I didn't really think about at first. Perhaps that's why it failed so quickly. It's not waterproof, so I'd suggest you knot it into a condom before popping it into your pussy. This one had juices inside it pretty quickly. Although I cleaned it well and replaced the batteries, the moisture that got inside this product might well have been the reason for its failure.

Another note on insertion: Don't stick anything without a base into your ass.

Another issue with remote-control eggs is the battery life. An expert in such matters explained to me that when there is a battery in the egg, it is constantly "on," waiting to receive a signal from the remote. In other words, always take the batteries out when you're not using it. Otherwise, the batteries last a day or two. I had to spend money on replacement batteries in one week. Please, someone, invent a better remote-control vibrating egg. Meanwhile, this one is worth a shot if you can afford batteries and are careful to keep it condom-covered. At the very least, it was fun while it lasted!