Gravity? Pssh. Sex on horizontal (and vertical) surfaces can be lame sometimes. You know, all that friction, traction, and rug burns, bumps and bruises. That stuff isn't sexy at all! (Okay, sometimes it can be, but anyway . . . )

With this awesome swing you can experience sex without gravity and it allows you to master acrobatic positions with ease. You get to get your lovin' on in a countless number of ways that aren't possible without something like this. Let your imagination run wild! There are some pretty exciting positions on the box, but you're really only limited by your imagination. The swing can hold up to 350 pounds (but only 200 with the spring), so it should be able to suit most people out there (and possibly two at a time if you're lucky/careful about it). It's just as fun for two ladies or two boys as it is for boy/girl couples. Again, endless possibilities!

That's not the end of it, though! Pipedream did just come out with a "bondage" version of this swing, but the only difference between the two is that the bondage one comes with attached D-rings. There's nothing that says you can't sew some on or finagle the straps a little bit. I've found that attaching cuffs to the top bar of the swing also works well, too. Throw those ankles through the ankle/wrist straps and attach some cuffs to them and hook a spreader bar to those bad boys. I'm still finding ways to incorporate other elements into the swing.

Aside from the obvious sexytime use, I've found a bunch of other fun things to do with this awesome piece of equipment. I enjoy hanging out in it and contemplating the meaning of life over a beer. You know those "yoga swings" out there? This can be one of those, too. I'm finding awesome ways to get in some solo workouts with it. Plus, it's an awesome thing to brag about. Everyone who doesn't have one wants one. Can we say 'fun'-ctional?

Sturdy, sturdy, sturdy! And comfy, too!

This swing comes in a few different parts. As someone who rigs up her own suspension/BDSM craziness, I've done a lot of research into the mechanics of hardware type things. Everything here has passed my personal standards inspections. Here's what you have:

Steel eyelet bolt - This is probably the most important part of the entire swing. I mean, it's not a swing if you can't sit in it, right? The bolt is incredibly solid and leaves just the eyelet sticking from the ceiling. It's nothing that anyone will gasp at the sight of or even really notice. If they ask, it'd for plants and such, you know?

Chain/Spring - I wasn't expecting these to come connected because you have the option of using the swing with our without the spring. I tried to see if they came apart and they don't. What I've done is (since I'm using the spring by itself) is connected the hooks to the top and bottom of the spring and just let the chain do its thing. I would be using the chain if the height of the swing wasn't lowered so much by it. Good thing about the chain, though, is that it allows you to adjust the height of the entire swing to your needs.

Connector hooks - These are your classic caribiner style. Very simple and easy to operate. They allow you to snap everything in and out of place with ease, but they're heavy duty and won't be coming loose or undone in the middle of things.

Swing bar - The top bar of this thing is super sturdy, too. It's not going to bend unless you have some superhuman strength. What I really enjoy about it is the straight bar on the bottom edge. It's a great place to grab on to, or you can attach things to it. Nifty!

Straps - The straps themselves are made of heavy duty nylon material. There are two butt/back/etc. straps, and two ankle/wrist/etc. straps. The seat straps have about 16" worth of padding running across the bottom. It's not super plush, but it does prevent the straps from digging into you too much. The two single straps also have the same deal going on in the loop at the end. All of the straps are fully adjustable so you can get a good fit for whichever position you choose.

First you'll have to get the swing up there. You'll want a stud finder for this job, as it's important that you find the center of your beam in the ceiling. Trust me, the tap test doesn't really work for this. The center of your beam will be a lot sturdier than the edges. Once you've found your beam (and marked the edges because you're extra cautious) it's time to install the eyelet. It is pretty sharp on its own, but drilling a small hole helps get things going. (I actually used the end of a screwdriver to drill mine.) It's going to be a little tough to get it all screwed in there. It's good to use a screwdriver or claw side of a hammer for a little extra leverage. This is the hardest part and you'll only have to do it once. After the eyelet is up there, all you need to do is use the hooks to snap the chain to the eyelet, and then the swing to the chain. Simple and easy. Everything comes pretty much assembled right out of the box so it'll only take about 15 minutes to get it all going for you.

Getting in the swing can be a little fiddly depending on how you have the straps adjusted. The swing is fully adjustable which means it can accommodate a wide range of heights with ease. Make sure you've got a good grip on everything before hopping into it. I haven't fallen out of it yet and I'm not the most graceful person in the world. If you have a second set of hands you'll be better off. I usually have one of the long straps a little lower than the other and use that as my seat. The leg straps are great for slipping your thighs through. If you have thighs that are on the thicker side you may not be able to get them all the way up your leg, but as long as you have them past your knees they greatly aid in stabilizing you and keeps your legs comfortably spread.

When in use, the swing is pretty quiet most of the time. The only time it may make much noise is if you're tilting from side to side in it or if you have some slack in the chain. It's nothing too terribly loud, either. My apartment has rather thin walls and I've been able to use it without causing the slightest disturbance.

In my experience, the swing has proven to be quite an amazing piece of equipment. Not only is it tons and tons of fun, but it's also comfortable and versatile. Of course there is the normal position that you'd do in it where you're half sitting/lying, but it also works well for doggy style positions and the strap that sits around your pelvis in this position also helps to compress the vagina which leads to a tighter feeling and greater g-spot stimulation. Not only is it a dream for penetrative sex, but it's also wonderful for any other foreplay activities. Oral sex is ramped up a couple of notches. BDSM activities can incorporate this swing. Hell, you can also be like me and just hang out in it or use it in a yoga swing manner for tightening and toning your muscles. It's probably one of my favorite things I've ever gotten for all of those reasons, and that's why you should have one, too.

This thing shouldn't need too much cleaning. As sex goes, though, it's bound to get a little messy at some point. Sadly, you can't detach the straps from the bar for easy cleaning, but they aren't something you'd really want to have come off, ya know? If your straps do need washing you can give them a once over with a damp cloth, or you can take the whole thing to the tub, wash everything, and hang it up with a towel under it so it can dry. Nylon dries rather quickly.

If you choose to tuck it away somewhere, all you'll have to do is unsnap the swing from the eyelet. It shouldn't need any special storage, but it is a little on the bulky side. You can easily tuck it under a bed or stick it in the closet. A duffle bag is another handy option. All you're left with is an eyelet bolt in the ceiling. Stick a plant on it and call it a day.

(Video coming soon!)