Despite it's oafish and clumsy looking exterior, the Hitachi Magic Wand is actually a very versatile toy. Sure, it works as a back massager; if you're some kind of prude. It works great as a clitoral vibrator, but hand to whatever God you believe in, I can orgasm just by holding this thing against my penis.

The wand only has two settings, but that really seems to be more than enough. My girlfriend and I both prefer the lower setting, as it seems to be less of a buzzing feeling and more of a massage. For some reason the vibrations also seem to have a deeper range of motion on the lower setting. Even on the lower setting, my lady is so sensitive that we often have to rest the head of the massager just above her clit or down at the base of her vagina, both of which are enough to get her off in a hurry. As for me, she can run it up and down my shaft or just place it near my rectum during oral to turn my stamina from "cartoon sex demon" to "sixteen-year-old virgin."

While the Wand is great for both of us flying solo, we also use it during sex. However, this is where it gets a bit awkward. The Wand is heavy, the handle is nearly a foot long, and the vibrating head is about the size of a tennis ball. Moreover, the cord is REALLY short. The cord can get caught or just get tugged out of the wall rather easily, and the size of the head can impede thrusting in certain positions. Before you invest in other accessories, you might want to get an extension cord. That said, my girlfriend and I use it at least half the time we have sex now, and it makes reaching simultaneous orgasms incredibly easy.

Why only half the time? The thing is LOUD; I mean really, really loud. I don't use it late at night because my walls are relatively thin and I have neighbors loud! Something to consider if you have roommates, but a great way to drown out the newlyweds next door when they get into a spat.

Given the variety of orifices it comes into contact with, we're pretty meticulous about cleaning it, but you may simply want to cover it with a condom or get an attachment. It isn't water proof, so you've got to be careful. I generally spray the head with a bit of toy cleaner and wipe it down with a damp cloth, and that seems to do the trick. I've noticed that the soft plastic on the head tends to pick up lint and the like, so you may want to cover it with a condom or get an attachment just for ease of cleanup.

Finally, this toy is durable. The manual included with the Wand is replete with warnings about careful use, very few of which I have heeded. I've placed this thing between my lower back and the floor and laid on it, pushed it roughly against my shoulders, my girlfriend has bucked against it hard enough to break somebody's neck, and it's still going strong.

I should start by pointing out that, before I purchased the hitachi wand, my girlfriend would have nothing to do with sex toys of any kind. One day she agreed to give one a shot, although she thought it was a waste of money, and insisted that it not be "some monstrosity they use in Japanese porn." So I set out to find something small and cute, and then I came across the Hitachi Magic Wand in a store. I picked it up, turned it on, and touched it with my hand. I'm not sure if hand can orgasm, but that day, mine did. So I threw out everything my girlfriend had said and bought it.

It took some coaxing and a lot of emotional finesse to get her to try it, but that toy single handedly changed her religion. We've since tried other vibrators, but there are simply none so powerful as the Magic Wand. I like to think that I'm pretty good with my hands, this toy brings her to orgasm in under a minute, so long as she doesn't hold back.

It's still my girl's favorite. I'm starting to worry about our next vacation because it's getting difficult to remember what sex was like before we bought the Hitachi wand. My only complaint is that I haven't quite figured out a good way to clean it. I'm considering buying an attachment to make the whole cleaning process easier. Nevertheless, I roam parties like an evangelist, preaching the virtues of the Wand and its mystical orgasmic power.