Like most people that have been in an intimate relationship, I’ve experienced delicious, sensual massages, baths, and showers that have put me in the mood for more; but I’ve never put enough effort in to actually purchase a kit like the Get Glowin’ Body Party. This sensual bath and massage kit endeavors to add even more fun and excitement to sharing the bath and shower with your lover. Needless to say, I was very excited and curious to be reviewing this kit. Unfortunately, I ended up being mostly disappointed.

 The “melon scented” Get Glowin’ Body Party does come in a convenient plastic, waterproof zipper bag and includes two 2 fl. Oz bottles each of glow-in-the-dark Heat Strokes warming lotion and glow-in-the-dark Body Gel for the shower; it also includes a petite nylon pouf and a small bar of Lights Out! glow-in-the-dark soap. The items also respond to black light.

 Excited, I decided to set them up on my side table and shine the light directly on the bottles and bar of soap for a good five minutes. After turning out the light, all three of the items glowed like bright, ambient green lamps.

 As far as the functionality of each of the items, though, I’d like to begin where I began: with the Heat Strokes lotion. Sadly after trying this, my opinion of the kit started to go down fast. The scent was definitely of melon, but it smelled more perfume-y and artificial than yummy (the same can be said for the Body Gel). As a big droplet, the lotion glows fine, but once it’s rubbed into the skin the glowing affect all but disappears. The glowing became so faint that I found I had to “recharge” the glow by turning on the light again just to get barely more glow effect.

The instructions on the bottle suggest that once massaged into the skin you should wait 2 to 3 minutes before feeling a warming effect, which could be made more intense by blowing on the skin. Unfortunately, even after five minutes I felt no warming effect at all. After even longer there was still no warming effect. After blowing on the lotion there was no heat, save for the actual heat from the breath.

For a “massage lotion” the texture is disappointing. Its texture is a little too thick, and is difficult to squeeze out of the tiny bottle. The lotion is thick and sticky, not at all slick and slippery. It made giving the massage more like work than pleasurable, and it made receiving the massage uncomfortable and gooey-feeling. In fact, once the lights were turned back on I found that the lotion had “pilled up” from the friction and attracted lint from the sheets. So basically, I was stinky, sticky, and dirty… and I didn’t even have an orgasm!

Next up, I tried the Lights Out! soap to wash the goo off of my hands. The bar of soap is small - about the size of a travel soap you’d pick up at the grocery store – and it had a very waxy texture until I got it wet. The melon scent for the bar of soap isn’t as bad, though. I “charged” up the soap in the light and then turned out the lights as I began to use it… and it was actually very cool. The lather was alright, not very thick or luxurious, but the lather itself did glow in the dark… it was a very neat effect and I think it would be extremely fun in a shared bath. Not only that, but the lather actually made the water in the sink glow! Very cool. The only bad thing I can say about the Lights Out! soap (other than the waxy texture) is the fact that it’s a little drying on the skin.

Finally, it was time to try the Body Gel in a nice, hot shower. I warmed up the shower, “charged” up the bottle of shower gel, and then out went the lights. As I mentioned before, the smell of the stuff isn’t all that appetizing, but the bright green glow that the bottle cast added some particularly romantic ambiance. The gel continued to glow brightly once squeezed on the pouf, but once it became a lather the glow was so weak it was hard to tell it was even there. The texture of the gel’s lather was an extreme disappointment… the lather was so weak that I wasn’t even able to wash my entire arm before the lather completely disappeared. The lather was so weak in fact that I found I used a quarter of the bottle just washing my upper body, before I got frustrated and switched to my normal soap.

All in all, while this didn’t turn me off from trying other novelty lovers’ kits (this was my first one, after all!), I was pretty disappointed with the Get Glowin’ Body Party’s general functioning. On a positive note, the kit is fairly innocent-looking (the most risqué thing about it is the exclamation of “Lather up & let the fantasy begin!” on the Body Gel) and I’d never be embarrassed to leave any part of this kit in my bathroom or on my bedside table. However, while the Get Glowin’ Body Party may glow very brightly… I’ve found that its overall performance is far from glowing.