This Is Not Sinatra's "Love & Marriage"

This porn was just not made for me. Blowjobs and facials just aren't my thing. Though I was pleased with the artistic qualities and care to cinematography details, I was completely let down with the sex, which is the entire purpose of a porn film. The sex was awkward and mediocre. The chemistry just wasn't there, not between most of the actors and definitely not in me.
Published:
Pros
Great Music, Decent Dialogue and Plot, Fair Acting, Good Cinematography
Cons
Everything Else
Rating by reviewer:
2
extremely useful review

Content / Genre / Audience



Frank Sinatra would probably roll over in his grave to hear a porn named after that song. But this porn film follows a plot all about marriage without love and love without marriage, or rather sex without marriage. The acting isn't Academy Award winning but it ranges from average to better than the standard porn film. And as long as you don't have high expectations for plot, you could actually remained intrigued throughout the story.

One positive thing I can say is that the introduction sequences/opening credits don’t give away the entire plot and all the details of the sex scenes. It was also nice, brief, and artistic. The first scene of the story it leads into at first just seemed typical of porn – empty set, too much make-up, and minimal plot. But honestly there was some fairly decent acting with some very impressive cinematography with the smooth cuts, well written dialogue, and the serious background music. I was impressed with this film at this point and it raised my expectations high, even though they didn't quite stay there.

Opening Scene

But as for general content, this porn has mostly hetero-couples and relatively vanilla sex scenes. The closest it comes to being shocking is two scenes with three people (one with two men and one woman and the other with two women, one man). There's no bondage, toys, fetishes, or anal sex in this one. Oh and there's a lot of blow jobs, facial money shots, and very awkward porn kissing. If that's your cup o' tea then this film might work better for you than it did me.

Because of the semi-decent plot and basic sex scenes, I think this film would be viewable by most adult audiences. But just because it would be non-offensive to most people doesn't mean it will be a turn on to everyone. As impressed as I was with the scene cuts, non-diegetic music, camera angles, and decent acting (by some, not all), it didn't exactly get my blood boiling.
    • Hetero
    • Mild
    • Threesome scenes

Actors

~CAST LIST~

Kayden Kross
Lisa Ann
Jessie Andrews
Breanna Benson
Manuel Ferrara
Scott Nails
Mick Blue
Tommy Gunn

I think this film features a menagerie of actors with differing levels of talent. Some of them are pretty decent at acting and not just having sex. Others, well, they need help acting like they're enjoying having sex. Kayden Kross, the film's feature star, did a pretty good job herself which made the whole thing much easier to get through. There are also a few particular scenes where the acting and chemistry between the people having sex were pretty obvious. Those scenes were the only reason I didn't fully give up on this film.
    • Decent acting/chemistry

DVD Features

~DVD MENU~

Play
Chapters

-18 Chapters
Special Features
-Behind the Scenes
-Slideshow
-Gallery
-Trailers

Contact
-Empty?

L&M Title Menu

~THE SEX SCENES~

First Scene

The first sex scene of the film begins with characters the viewers have no knowledge of. And for the sake of surprise, I’ll try not to reveal any plot in this review (because its one of the only things this film has going for it). There are two men and one woman, though it’s not quite a typical threesome. The men take turns getting oral sex and then fucking her while the other one watches. It’s almost a hot voyeur scene. As for the sex, there are a whole lot of blow jobs, which isn’t really my favorite thing. What I did notice was that the kissing was awkward and she definitely didn’t seem very turned on by it. In fact, she spent most of the scene making only vague breathing (“hissing” more like it) sounds. And why did she keep biting her finger nail? Would nobody stop the scene to fix it for her? And it ends in a facial, which is also really not my thing. If it’s not yours, just look away for a few seconds because thankfully it’s short.

First Sex Scene

Second Scene

If you like whipped cream, stay tuned! Yes this is the first sex scene in the few porn movies I own that feature a food item (i.e. sloshing). It’s not in any great amount or all that messy, but it counts. But just like the previous scene, it begins with insanely awkward and not very stimulating kissing. It’s a pattern. But, as before, there’s oral sex followed by some “impromptu” PIV sex on the kitchen counter. The woman in this scene differs greatly from the woman in the first in two ways: she has very large voluptuous breasts and she actually seems to derive some amount of pleasure from the sex. The man is awkward in this one, at least in my opinion, but he’s definitely more attentive to his partner. But once again, it ends in a facial. Avert your eyes temporarily.

Second Sex Scene

Third Scene

This is the first sex scene with Kayden Kross. There’s the typical oral sex, of course, but I feel like there’s a little more cunnilingus in this one than the other scenes. There’s even a little variety with a 69 position thrown in there. And what there is definitely more of is noises, from moaning to loud exclamations… about Jesus. Anyway, she is either a highly talented actor or there’s some actual chemistry in this scene as opposed to the ‘dead fish’ feeling of most of the others. And this is random but I noticed offhand in one part of the sex sequence that she has a semi-covered (or semi-removed) playboy bunny tattoo. That definitely was no coincidental birthmark! And just to keep you readers in-the-know, this scene ends in a facial. Surprised?

Third Sex Scene
    • Attractive design
    • Scene selection
    • Special features / bonus included

Personal comments

Fourth Sex Scene

This one is more a standard threesome with all three partners active but, trust me, it’s not all that sexy. The women at best are only mildly attractive, which probably is in part due to the street-walker amount of make-up. But then they also begin with the same awkward as hell kissing followed by oral while the man watches. But it doesn’t take him long to join in the fray himself and use his mouth and fingers on the women, followed by a two-woman blow job. And then there is a little fucking to round it off. This was honestly my least favorite scene and it just couldn’t hold my attention. It took multiple sittings to get through it. And the ending wasn’t even worth all the trouble because, you guessed it, there’s another facial cum shot at the end.

Fourth Sex Scene

Fifth Sex Scene

This final scene, for the record, lasts about 23 minutes! Yes, that's just the sex. But thankfully it's one of the most tolerable of the film. I can't say I loved it but it definitely did more for me than the others did. Some important details include the fact that the man has an uncircumcised penis. I know some people have strong opinions in either direction about them but I don't think it was bothersome or shocking in anyway in the scene.

This scene has quite a bit of oral from both parties and some light spanking as well. I'm also pleased to share that the kissing is a tiny bit better than the others too. And as long as you don't blink at the wrong time, you'll even catch a quick external ass stimulation. But, none too surprising, is that this scene just can't help ending in a facial once more, sealing its fate as merely a 2-star porn for me.

Fifth Sex Scene
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

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Comments
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  • Contributor: leatherlover
    Thanks for the great review. I like the scene photos, I am going to have to figure out how to do that myself for my next review.
  • Contributor: ~LaUr3n~
    I've taught quite a few people if you need help, let me know!
  • Contributor: darthkitt3n
    Great review!
  • Contributor: Darling Jen
    Leatherlover - it's super easy to do screencaps once you have the few little tricks. Let me know if you want help figuring it out!
  • Contributor: PussyGalore
    Great review! Would love to know how to do the screencaps. I'll send a message through here!
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