Kama Sutra: The Perfect Bedside Companion, by Sir Richard F. Burton, is a pretty cute little book. Its 288 pages are contained within a hardcover binding that has red satin over it. The satin has a few floral designs on it, mostly around the binding. The front cover also has a very small illustration taken from one of the many inside the book. There’s a closure on this, which is basically just a wooden bead and some elastic. It’s not functional at all to keep people out, though it does make this look nicer when it’s sitting out on my nightstand. The covers of this measure about 6.5 inches square. The pages feel pretty high in quality and didn’t smudge at all for me.

Inside of the book, there are a lot of little floral designs and pictures. Chapters are started off with white pages showing a red floral design and the chapter’s name in black. Each section starts with a pink page with gray and grayish-green floral print and the title of the chapter. Each section starts with “On,” and has the first letter of the actual writing styled up as an image. For example, “On the Various Modes of Striking, and on the Sounds Appropriate to Them.” Most of the pages, with the exception of illustrated pages or pink pages beginning each chapter, have a 3/4 of an inch gray bar along the edge of the page. The font is centered into a 2 1/2 inch column on each page.

The style of the whole book gives a feel that it’s been around for centuries. It’s nice to see something so beautifully written about sex. I got the feeling after reading it that this is something like a book men pass down to their sons in order to educate them on sex, women, and what to expect of women. There is a lot of discussion on what traits to look for in a woman, like education in the arts, and how to dominate her a little. Some of the writing discusses scaring a woman or abusing her to show affection. For example, one section talks about gently touching a woman, rather than handling her roughly with nails, in order to cause her alarm.

While this is beautifully written, it’s also kind of hard to understand. There are a lot of references to other texts and people that I didn’t know anything about. Because this is so old-fashioned, too, it’s difficult to understand the wording. It’s not written like Shakespeare, though I feel this is a bit harder to read than the original version of Shakespeare’s plays. Honestly, though, I’d rather read this a few times than pick up a copy of a Cliff Notes on it.

The images that are used in the book go along perfectly with the text. All of the people depicted in the images appear to be Middle Eastern and are typically paired together as male-female couples. A few pages show things like groups of women bathing as a man looks on, though. There is nudity in every picture, though it is done in a style that isn’t pornographic. It’s much more artistic.

Each chapter contains a lot of information, which I have summarized:

Chapter 1: Society and Social Concepts
I ended up skipping through a lot of this chapter. I found it a little boring, since it mostly discusses how people should be living. It explains the 64 artistic concepts women must learn, including things like tattooing, gymnastics, gambling, languages, poetry, and teaching parrots to speak. The rest of the chapter discusses how a man should properly live, such as where to find a house, who to marry, how to decorate his house and body, what festivals to attend, and other things. It’s also mentioned a lot that men are to attend rooster and ram fights. I didn’t feel this related at all to current society, especially since it would be a little odd if everyone had their living room decorated with their couch and footstool in the same place with a spittoon sitting next to it.

Chapter 2: On Sexual Union
This chapter discusses how couples match up sexually, through both the size of their genitals and their passion for each other. Men and women are broken down into groups of animals according to the size or depth of their genitals, and are matched together on a table. Different combinations of animals are shown as either good or bad matches. This chapter also discusses different techniques on embracing, kissing, scratching, biting, slapping, and sexual positions. There are pages of different sex positions, though each is only briefly discussed and there aren’t any images to help describe them. Positions are divided into sections of man on top, woman on top, and oral.


**Continued**

Chapter 3: About the Acquisition of a Wife
This whole chapter discusses basically winning over a girl’s heart with gifts and attention. It tells how a man should hug, make love to, and touch her to really let her know he cares for her. The very end of the chapter has a small paragraph for what women should look for in a man, such as obedience and an ability to please her. For the most part, this chapter is pretty useful. Some of the ideas can be used to come up with something different to do with a partner, whether it is to get to know each other better or enjoy a new activity together.

Chapter 4: On the Means of Attracting Others to Yourself
For the most part, this chapter lists different ointments and recipes both men and women can use to make themselves appear more attractive or give themselves sexual benefits. For example, one section has a small recipe of mixing together rice and sparrow eggs, boiling it in milk, and mixing that concoction with honey and ghee into a beverage that allows a man to “enjoy innumerable women.” None of the recipes listed in this chapter give exact measurements, such as one cup of milk, so there’s not a good chance of actually making any of these exactly right. I would have preferred a list of herbs or foods that increase libido, blood flow, make skin feel softer, etc., since the reader can just work on eating more of that food or herb, rather than figuring out how to mix ointments. This chapter also lists different ways for men to make themselves more attractive using bracelets and bone adornments. There is one part of this chapter that I found somewhat disturbing. It suggests that men rub parts of tree bugs on their penises followed by some oils, then allowing the penis to become swollen. Because of this, I do not feel that very much of the information in this chapter can honestly be used safely. While it makes an interesting read, there’s a good possibility of allergic reactions or something if any of the ideas or recipes are used.

Overall, I found this book a little boring, yet also interesting. The tone of this makes me feel like I am reading a man handbook or something. I also feel it’s a bit difficult to relate to, due to cultural differences and references to different works, gods, and people that I am not familiar with. I had to look up a few words in order to actually understand what some sections are trying to tell me. This is a pretty cute little bedside book, though I do not feel I would recommend this to any of my friends, due to it being a difficult, somewhat boring read. People looking for sexual advice would most likely be better off looking for an informative manual such as The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex.

I still do think this is cute and that it would make a good gift, though I personally don't use it at all anymore except as a decorative book and a paperweight. Reading through it once was enough for me.