Not without my anus... A book that barely scratches the anus in anal play
After I read this book, I felt like I would never get the time back that it took to read it. I feel that there is much more detailed information in most of the anal toy reviews here at EF. Not to mention, the vast information here in the Forums. This book in my opinion dumbed down anal play and sex. The only good thing in my opinion abut this book, is that it is a nice, simple, basic intro to anal play. And I mean intro.
Published:
Pros
fits right into your pocket
Cons
child-like, no in-depth information and VERY vague, corny puns
A few months ago, I was contacted by the "Tickle my Tush" publicist and asked to review this book on my blog, The World According to Woman.
Let's go over what I liked about this book first;
- I really enjoyed and appreciated how much Dr Allison stressed "communication is key". This is something I do feel is vitally important when it comes to relationships, sex in general and I feel it is even more important in anal play. She spoke of how the feelings of how words can affect the one that is being penetrated. I know one of the first times a man took my ass there was some fecal matter left on his penis. I was not “prepared”, I was tied up at the time and he just took my ass. When he realised there was some poop on his cock, he freaked out. Can you imagine being tied up not being able to move while a man is freaking out about how disgusting it is to have shit on his cock? As with almost everything in this book, this is very breifly mentioned in passing. It took years for me to get comfortable once again with my body and it’s functions to allow a man to penetrate my bum. And I know many women are the same position. Even though we know it is natural and these types of “accidents” DO happen, it is embarrassing for us especially when the person doing the penetration makes a fuss about it.
- Page 14 said it best regarding how some people see anal play as being "gay": "Note: it’s the gender of your partner- not the sexual activity that defines your sexual orientation." To me, I feel that this should have been stressed a little more, but this quote is so beautiful and perfect in my opinion. This should have also been used as a selling/marketing point as it is that good.
- I like how in Chapter 6, she talks of some simple buttock massage techniques.
- Dr Allison discusses how safety is key.
Chapters:
Table of Contents
1 Butts up?
2 Frequently Assed Questions
3 Safety First
4 Heinie Hygiene
5 Backdoor Anatomy Map
6 Sensual Booty Massage
7 Fingerplay
8 Lick-O-Lingus!
9 The Art of Penetration
10 Orgasmic Spotplay
11 Hot Butt Toys
12 Strap-on Seduction
13 Positions of Pleasure
14 Frequently Assed Questions 2
Now; unfortunately, because this is a review, I have to discuss what I did not like about this book.
In this day and age, it seems like we are afraid to actually use our words. In the "con's" section, I spoke of child-like, and in the summary I spoke of how this book dumbed-down words and phrases. I got the feeling that we should be ashamed of our bodies. What the feck is a c-spot? A pleasure inch? A spot? He-spot?
Seriously.
I was so annoyed at reading these dumbed down phrases that I felt insulted my intelligence. I can understand trying to make anal play less intimidating... but using wrong terms to do it just seems weak.
Let me explain: the anterior fornix erogenous zone was discovered by a Malaysian scientist Dr. Chua Chee Ann in 1990 (there is some controversy on the year), where he found that stimulation of this spot, resulted in rapid lubrication and a heightened state of arousal. Now, just like the Gräfenberg Spot, we call it a g-spot because well... can you imagine during sex? "Hell yes! That's it! Just like that along my Gräfenberg Spot!" Can you really ask someone to call your anterior fornix erogenous zone by it's proper name? Nope. So it was coined the "a spot".
However; in Dr Allison's book, the "a spot" is the... anus.
I mean I can grasp taint, g-spot and p-spot (rather than the prostate gland), but why on earth call a woman’s clit a “c-spot”? I can grasp in many romance or erotic stories calling the clit; nub, rose bud, pleasure centre etc.. but in a how to book or a book that is supposed to be educational?
I disagree it’s not educational. It’s taking words and in a sense bastardizing them and branding them and act of sex as wrong. Rather than being proud of our bodies and their proper or commonly used names, we are hiding them as if we should be ashamed of having a clit or a rectum.
I also did not enjoy how Chapter 11, she does VERY briefly touch upon toys. She doesn't stress upon the safety of a flared base on toys, she briefly mentions it. And with this being an intro to anal and a how- to book, you know people. Many people think because it’s not in big flashy lights, it doesn't apply to them.
Let's go over what I liked about this book first;
- I really enjoyed and appreciated how much Dr Allison stressed "communication is key". This is something I do feel is vitally important when it comes to relationships, sex in general and I feel it is even more important in anal play. She spoke of how the feelings of how words can affect the one that is being penetrated. I know one of the first times a man took my ass there was some fecal matter left on his penis. I was not “prepared”, I was tied up at the time and he just took my ass. When he realised there was some poop on his cock, he freaked out. Can you imagine being tied up not being able to move while a man is freaking out about how disgusting it is to have shit on his cock? As with almost everything in this book, this is very breifly mentioned in passing. It took years for me to get comfortable once again with my body and it’s functions to allow a man to penetrate my bum. And I know many women are the same position. Even though we know it is natural and these types of “accidents” DO happen, it is embarrassing for us especially when the person doing the penetration makes a fuss about it.
- Page 14 said it best regarding how some people see anal play as being "gay": "Note: it’s the gender of your partner- not the sexual activity that defines your sexual orientation." To me, I feel that this should have been stressed a little more, but this quote is so beautiful and perfect in my opinion. This should have also been used as a selling/marketing point as it is that good.
- I like how in Chapter 6, she talks of some simple buttock massage techniques.
- Dr Allison discusses how safety is key.
Chapters:
Table of Contents
1 Butts up?
2 Frequently Assed Questions
3 Safety First
4 Heinie Hygiene
5 Backdoor Anatomy Map
6 Sensual Booty Massage
7 Fingerplay
8 Lick-O-Lingus!
9 The Art of Penetration
10 Orgasmic Spotplay
11 Hot Butt Toys
12 Strap-on Seduction
13 Positions of Pleasure
14 Frequently Assed Questions 2
Now; unfortunately, because this is a review, I have to discuss what I did not like about this book.
In this day and age, it seems like we are afraid to actually use our words. In the "con's" section, I spoke of child-like, and in the summary I spoke of how this book dumbed-down words and phrases. I got the feeling that we should be ashamed of our bodies. What the feck is a c-spot? A pleasure inch? A spot? He-spot?
Seriously.
I was so annoyed at reading these dumbed down phrases that I felt insulted my intelligence. I can understand trying to make anal play less intimidating... but using wrong terms to do it just seems weak.
Let me explain: the anterior fornix erogenous zone was discovered by a Malaysian scientist Dr. Chua Chee Ann in 1990 (there is some controversy on the year), where he found that stimulation of this spot, resulted in rapid lubrication and a heightened state of arousal. Now, just like the Gräfenberg Spot, we call it a g-spot because well... can you imagine during sex? "Hell yes! That's it! Just like that along my Gräfenberg Spot!" Can you really ask someone to call your anterior fornix erogenous zone by it's proper name? Nope. So it was coined the "a spot".
However; in Dr Allison's book, the "a spot" is the... anus.
I mean I can grasp taint, g-spot and p-spot (rather than the prostate gland), but why on earth call a woman’s clit a “c-spot”? I can grasp in many romance or erotic stories calling the clit; nub, rose bud, pleasure centre etc.. but in a how to book or a book that is supposed to be educational?
I disagree it’s not educational. It’s taking words and in a sense bastardizing them and branding them and act of sex as wrong. Rather than being proud of our bodies and their proper or commonly used names, we are hiding them as if we should be ashamed of having a clit or a rectum.
I also did not enjoy how Chapter 11, she does VERY briefly touch upon toys. She doesn't stress upon the safety of a flared base on toys, she briefly mentions it. And with this being an intro to anal and a how- to book, you know people. Many people think because it’s not in big flashy lights, it doesn't apply to them.
Experience
Continued:
Another point that I feel was lacking in this book, but is in pretty much every anal toy review, in almost every forum or blog post I have ever read on anal play, we talk about the importance of lube. We go on and on and on about lube. In "Tickle my Tush"... it is briefly touched upon.
This book is also geared to heterosexual couples.
Now, I was excited to get this book in the mail because when it was offered to me, I was really exploring anal play and I was curious about possibly investing in enemas/anal douching. I was more than a little disappointed with Dr Allison's talk about "preparing". She talks about how the best anal sex is when it is a planned event. I don't know about you guys, but the best anal sex I've ever had is when it is not planned. I wish in this book she spent more time (and I mean more than the barely half a page currently) talking about how to prepare. She spent more time talking about removing hair from your butt crack than on enemas and anal douching, or a healthy diet that promotes regular bowel movements.
Would I recommend this:
I gave this book to a friend who is just starting to explore sex with her husband. Simply because, it is a simple and easy to read book. With it's cutesie terminology, it won't make a newbie to anal intimidated.
For those that have even done the tinest amount of research about anal sex... give this book a pass.
Changes I would make:
Now let me just say, no where does it say that this is a how-to or a guideline for anal sex. I am under the impression that this book is more an intro book to those who have never had or performed anal (of any kind) on a person. But to make this book more informative (it is after all from mild to wild anal play for everybody), I would have gone more indepth, making it a little less child-like and providing more information.
She is a doctor after all.
So bottom line that I will leave you with is this... what is wrong with calling my anus an anus?
Another point that I feel was lacking in this book, but is in pretty much every anal toy review, in almost every forum or blog post I have ever read on anal play, we talk about the importance of lube. We go on and on and on about lube. In "Tickle my Tush"... it is briefly touched upon.
This book is also geared to heterosexual couples.
Now, I was excited to get this book in the mail because when it was offered to me, I was really exploring anal play and I was curious about possibly investing in enemas/anal douching. I was more than a little disappointed with Dr Allison's talk about "preparing". She talks about how the best anal sex is when it is a planned event. I don't know about you guys, but the best anal sex I've ever had is when it is not planned. I wish in this book she spent more time (and I mean more than the barely half a page currently) talking about how to prepare. She spent more time talking about removing hair from your butt crack than on enemas and anal douching, or a healthy diet that promotes regular bowel movements.
Would I recommend this:
I gave this book to a friend who is just starting to explore sex with her husband. Simply because, it is a simple and easy to read book. With it's cutesie terminology, it won't make a newbie to anal intimidated.
For those that have even done the tinest amount of research about anal sex... give this book a pass.
Changes I would make:
Now let me just say, no where does it say that this is a how-to or a guideline for anal sex. I am under the impression that this book is more an intro book to those who have never had or performed anal (of any kind) on a person. But to make this book more informative (it is after all from mild to wild anal play for everybody), I would have gone more indepth, making it a little less child-like and providing more information.
She is a doctor after all.
So bottom line that I will leave you with is this... what is wrong with calling my anus an anus?
Follow-up commentary
7 months after original review
I ended up giving this away, my friend tried to return it to be, but I insisted she keep it.
If you are brand new to anal play, it might be the book for you. But for anyone who has read anything about anal play, you have more knowledge than this book has for you.
If you are brand new to anal play, it might be the book for you. But for anyone who has read anything about anal play, you have more knowledge than this book has for you.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com
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"Hell yes! That's it! Just like that along my Gräfenberg Spot!" you mean I am the only one who says that??
If you're going to write a book about anal, or read one, you should probably be OK with using the term anus lmao. Even reading the titles of the chapters was like 'that sounds really terrible'
this book sounds super cringeworthy and lol @ your friend returning it to you. Smh @ people cutting down good trees for this crap.