Book discontinued
by Cleis Press Inc.

Just Watch Me Put A Bunch Of Lukewarm Erotica Between The Covers Of A Book

A collection of short erotica stories that are meant for women (or anyone) who get off on plot more than reading about sex acts. Don't read this out loud to your partner unless you want them to NOT be turned on. I can't imagine the stories from this book doing very much for anyone, ever, in the department of arousal.
Published:
Pros
mostly decent writing styles
Cons
not very hot at all
Rating by reviewer:
2
extremely useful review

Content / Style / Audience

This is a collection of various short erotica stories directed at women. I'm not entirely sure what makes them for women, since women have sex drives too and a number of these stories were fairly lame. Not a single story in this book got me even close to aroused.

The writing is good, mind you. A few of them were spicier than others, and some had clever subject matter, one even made me laugh, but if this is what "erotica for women" is, I'm sorely disappointed.

Personal comments

Unfortunately, it seems that erotica "written for women" includes a lot of detail about what the cafe looks like and how the wind feels and what coat she's wearing and the wares that this one shop has in its window display, and the sex is implied.

Not in all cases, mind you. There were stories in here that were more detailed than others and pretty much got straight to fucking.

But for example in Reading To Horst we read several pages of scenery and stalking and conversational nonsense and when it gets to the "good part," the author describes the "slurping sounds that come from the activity from between her legs" and doesn't put near as much effort into the actual sex scene as she did where she described the main character reading to the stranger. The sex gets glossed over and it's over before it started, and then the story ends.

The Upper Hand however was quite funny. I'm not sure if it was meant to be, but it made me laugh. It's the story of a cougar who finds that she's being spied on by neighborhood college boys, who she then spies on back and coerces to come help her with some work around the house. Suddenly it becomes a frantic search for a tossed condom into a pile of half built bookshelf with her words "whoever finds it gets to fuck me, and the other has to give me a show."

Not every story in this book is lame, but honestly as I said, there was nothing here that even remotely moved me.

Experience

I'd read the book out loud each night to my boyfriend, who was on the edge of his seat waiting for the sex scenes to heat up, and they just never did. Imagine this book as a microwaved burrito with the edges piping hot and crusty with the middle still a big ball of frozen beans. And about as satisfying.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

EdenFantasys Review Program

  • Get Free Toys
  • Enjoy Special Deals
Become a Reviewer
Comments
Subscribe to comments
  • Contributor: Owl Identified
    "Sex is implied" sounds like the WORST erotica ever. UGH. I fucking hate when collections or erotica writers think that catering to a female audience means the sex barely exists. But then again, I have a problem with the idea of "writing for women" period - since all women are different. Great review, concise and honest and unlike this book you get right to the point.
  • Contributor: Danielle1220
    Great review!
  • Contributor: Kayla
    Awww. This makes me sad. This is one of the books I need to read, and I guess I was expecting more. Some of the women's erotica collections are like that, but not all.
  • Contributor: ZenaidaMacroura
    Boo. I don't get why they think women find this kind of stuff sexy. I love your burrito analogy. Haha. Thanks for the review.
  • Contributor: G.L. Morrison
    Your review is brilliantly written but I have to admit that I don't inherently trust it. The "didn't turn me on" comments or "I don't get its" are a common enough trope in erotica reviews. Or book and movie reviews period. The reliability of such a review is contingent on my having greater sexual/literary compatibility with the reviewer than with editor or authors.

    I did appreciate the "slurping" excerpt as an example of what was unlikeable about it. Specific.
  • Contributor: Aydios
    thanks
Forum
No discussions yet.
Thank you for viewing Just Watch Me – erotic book review page!