I’ve always thought that going down on a girl for the first time must be one of the most nerve-wracking sexual experiences there is. How do you learn what to do if your partner isn’t guiding you? And what if that partner doesn’t really know what to suggest herself? Sure, almost any attention paid to my pink parts is going to feel nice, but turning nice into “OMG” into “kapow!” is a more complicated prospect. Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Oral Sex: Cunnilingus is no substitute for trial and error and lots of practice, but as a primer or refresher course, it is as technically precise as you’re likely to find.

It begins with Justine Joli leading a crash course on female genitalia for a group of couples, using a diagram and then a live partner to demonstrate specific ways to position one’s body, hands, lips, and tongue for maximum effect. It’s all rather clinical at this point, and the workshop audience looks uncomfortably staged, but the information and Justine’s delivery is straightforward and authoritative. Watch for the woman who talks about how long it takes her to reach orgasm through oral sex. We got a kick out of the forlorn look on her partner’s face and the way she reassuringly pats his hand when Justine tells them that’s normal and might be just the way it is for them.

Two long hetero-couple scenes follow, with an emphasis on demonstrating the techniques just introduced in a more sensual and personal way. I didn’t find them particularly arousing, and was disappointed that the music was the standard issue cheesy soundtrack of HR training videos. But the scenes were well lit and the couples well positioned so that you can see tips and techniques in practice in a way that scripted porn rarely allows. Tristan Taormino narrates, and every few minutes a bubble of text appears on the screen underscoring the action and reminding us of a tip introduced in the workshop scene. Like VH1’s Pop-Up Video, but without the bubble sound effects. They’re kind of goofy, but they help keep the atmosphere light and the overall tone of the disc friendly, and you can also choose to watch the scenes without any extras at all.

Overall, I give a thumbs up to anything that can successfully combine the message that good sex comes with communication, practice, and knowing yourself with actual how-to ideas. There may be no correct way to have sex, but there sure as a hell are a lot of boring, ineffective, and misguided ways, and any advice on avoiding those pitfalls is worth listening to. Doing the homework to figure out which of that advice works for you is the fun part.