My expectations for erotica are very simple; raunchy or artistic. This was easily one of the worst collections of the genre I have ever read. I’ve grown up on the America’s Best Erotica series, and it blew this Mammoth Book of Erotica out of the water. Of this book’s 572 pages, I only made it to 303. Some of the stories were creative and interesting, but few sparked a sexual interest, and others were obviously written only to shock the reader.

Between stories of nine-year-olds sexually servicing elderly judges (“A Carcass of Dreams” Pg.157), nuns masturbating while the Pope “confesses” that he’s an atheist (“Pray On Me” Pg. 224), and a mass murderer surrounded by the preserved faces of women in orgasm (“Bluebeard’s Instant Grecian Urn” Pg.199), these stories lack beauty and class at every turn. There were a few good passages, like one from Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty series (“Beauty’s Punishment” Pg.91); a remarkable series if you’re interesting in bondage or fetish practices. Most of the other stories seemed overripe, like the story about a man who longs for a threesome, but when presented with a fourth woman, narrates the whole short story telling the reader how three women is far too many.

Pros: Wow, this is hard… I’ll settle for the presence of lots of different stories to choose from. There are a handful of interesting narratives, and if you like vague sexual references, this is a great choice.

Cons: Some stories have a slight artistic flavor which make them interesting, but rarely reach any point of sexual tension. Others are obviously written by people who have no idea what their talking about or were written for some strange form of shock value that I don’t understand. Honestly and truly, if you really want a good book of erotica, stick with the America’s Best series or ask a professional for a fine book at any local bookstore.

I believe a rating of 2 stars is appropriate. I can’t justify handing this book over in any form of confidence. I would be too worried I would offend the receiver with some of the above issues. There were a few minor typos that made the stories I was reading difficult to understand and a few of the “Artistic” stories seemed drawn out and ill written, usually with some kind of pathetic vampiric undertone. The big name authors bring some good beef to the table, but I compare this with having a wonderful date who holds your hand, kisses your cheek, and whispers in your ear how he wants to do your sister. There is a lot of lead in, but it just leaves you wondering where the author went without you.

I hope, if you decide to buy the Mammoth Book of Erotica, my disappointment leads you to be pleasantly surprised, but I wouldn’t be astonished if this particular book finds its way into a burn pile or the Salvation Army.