[knock knock knock]

I opened the door for the pizza delivery guy, smelling sausage and wondering what his tasted like. I pulled him inside the apartment door and tore off his belt and unzipped his jeans, as the pizza dropped to the floor..

This book is not that. As they say about not judging a book by its cover, this one is no exception. It’s not cover-to-cover of hot stories and fantasies come to life. It it very unlikely that while reading this, you’ll suddenly find your hand up your skirt and be scrambling around for AA batteries that weren’t pushed past their prime.

Don’t mistake me. I’m not saying it’s crap and an utter waste of your time; I just don’t want you to buy it on the premise that it’s a hot read. The seventeen short stories seem as though they’re written from a perspective that’s almost too objective—detached, perhaps—not as one generally is while turned on. Like there’s a disconnect between the actions of the writer and their emotions. They’re not immersed. It’s like the events were tape recorded and transcribed.

A quote from the book, that might better illustrate what I’m trying to convey: “So when I say, for example, that we had a threesome with one of her coworkers…” [we’ll pause for just a second here while you think, Well THAT sounds pretty hot!] “…I want to tell you about the part of the experience that set it apart from fantasy—the odd bits, the parts that didn’t work, the moments of awkwardness.” So we’re cheated of the hot bits and told why it sucked.

You know what? This is like TV. I know that even actors have to go pee, experience many boring and unpleasant hours at work, occasionally get bad service in the store, and maybe get hemorrhoids, but what I don’t want is a show with all these bits included. I have unpleasant bits in my own life and I’d like to immerse in a realistic but somewhat sieved version while reading or watching TV. I’m not saying I want Cinderella stories, but hearing what was unpleasant about a sex episode without even hearing the hot bits…

My impression of this collection is that whomever selected the stories for inclusion was either sexless and unhorny or angry and detached from sexuality but remembers a time of being immersed. There’s a fascination with sexual events but from a distanced perspective. It has some fascinating bits in it but I lost steam midway through when it was clear it was all of a one and it smacked of lacking the passion towards sex that I believe to be a healthy perspective. So if you’d appreciate a good but somewhat clinical sex book, this is the one for you.

...but I'm pleased to say the book went on to gain a second life; I sent it to the troops to liven things up for them! If you have any sexy books sitting around collecting dust, Google 'send books to the troops' or similar and maybe even talk to some friends, get a Porn Pile goin'! :)