A great book for those new to BDSM!

I would recommend this book to anyone who is interested in the BDSM scene/lifestyle. Beginners or veterans of the scene can appreciate the well written humor laden book.
Philip Miller and Molly Devon have had a GREAT run with this book, with their 24th printing last year (2008). If you are looking to explore this lifestyle I suggest you pick up this book! Please if your curious, find a copy of this book!
Published:
Pros
Well written.
Humor filled.
Co-written by a Dom Male/sub fem.
Cons
A bit dated.
Rating by reviewer:
5
somewhat useful review

About author

I love that this book is co-written by a male/female couple. I really enjoy their sense of humor and what seems to me, to be an extensive knowledge base. Between the two of them Molly and Philip have more than 20 years of experience in kink/BDSM. They also have had the distinct benefit of having recieved training from people in the SM community with internationally recognized expertise.

Content / Style / Audience

This is a really good book for people who are just starting to explore BDSM. It is full of amazing information with a nice touch of humor with out being dumb or sounding condescending. It is co-written by an D/s couple. I really enjoyed that it was well written and well worded. It is geared towards a Male Dominant/Female submissive, which is both good and bad I suppose. While that is their dynamic, they also recognize that there are lots of other dynamics including gay/lesbian couples. The first few chapters are must reads, but then goes into more of a 'how to' style book. There is also a pretty decent glossary in the back along with some resources.

This is an excerpt from the begining of the book:

"How to use this book:
In the first two chapeters we introduce SM and offer a basic explanaation of its practice. Some topics may seem fantastic, frightening or unlikely to the novice. We ask you to read them with an open mind; within are keys that can reveal new worlds of sensation and experience.
Chapters three and four discuss finding partners, forming relationships, and sexual attitudes that work well in SM sexuality.
Chapters six through ten are practical "how-to's." You can skip around these various topics to find tidbits to tickle your fancy.
Chapters eleven and twelve discuss the most paradoxical and elusive elements of SM; the eroticism of pain and humiliation.
We conclude with chapter 13, a survery of dungeon equipment, decoration, and furnishing. Here you will find examples of SM toys and plans for making your own goodies.
As we mentioned above, there is an extensive glossary and several appendices that you may find helpful."


I have to admit that there is VERY little that I didn't like about this book. I have to say that about the only thing I didn't like was that it seemed a bit dated to me. It's first printing was in 1995 (wow that's 15 years ago... Good job guys!) I loved this book.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Good home read.
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere

Design

The cover is a wonderful bright blue, with what I think is a very tasteful, sexy photo. The font isn't super fancy and the background is a bit busy but all in all its tasteful and attractive.

I like the lay out of the chapters and glossary content. Its easy to follow, whether you want to read front to back or read through the first few chapters then use the rest as a "How To" manual.

Personal comments

This is just a great book. I have lent my copy out to many friends who have mentioned interst in BDSM, including my partner. I am that impressed with it.

Experience

I really love this book. I got my first copy shortly after turning 17. It was a safe, useful, informative guide to a lifestyle that I was just starting to explore. I recently bought a new copy to share with my boyfriend who is more on the vanilla side of the spectrum, He also found it wonderfully helpful. Hell I even recently lent it to a younger curious friend, I am waiting to hear back from her on what she thought (and hoping to get my book back!)

I spent a few hours thinking on this book today before I started re-working this review, trying to decide if I have a favorite chapter... favorite excerpt... Anything... and I am struggleing to pick a favorite. I love all of this book. The first chapter is a great one as it goes over what SM is and what the roles mean to them (authors). I was able to connect with them and I read through this, and felt that I was no longer 'abnormal' I also enjoyed the Making your own toys section of Chapter 13 along with "Ouch.....Mmmmm!" Experienceing pain as pleasure in Chapter 11. The Glossary is a wonderful resource as well. There is also an appendix with a statement on Domestic Violence, which I find to be note worthy because of the great misunderstandings about SM.
Follow-up commentary
I still love this book, I probably always will ^_^ I lent it to a friend who also loved it, I was more than happy to share it with a friend who was curious and wanting to learn.
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Comments
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  • Contributor: Kayla
    I really want to read it. I haven't read it yet. I love the red stockings in your profile pic. We have some of those. Thanks for the review.
  • Contributor: RosesThorns
    Thankyou! Its one of my fav books honestly.
  • Contributor: Juliettia
    Can you tell us what sections you liked the most. Maybe give an example of what's included in the book.
  • Contributor: TitsMcScandal
    What exactly is covered? How do they break up the chapters? Is there anything that might be common in BDSM that isn't as well covered as it could be? Is it geared towards only those new/interested in the lifestyle or would those who are experienced enjoy this book too?
  • Contributor: removedacnt
    Thanks for the review.
  • Contributor: Heartthrob
    Thanks for the review. I would really like it if you added more info about the content of the book.
  • Contributor: Miss Cinnamon
    You say that the first few chapters are must-reads. Why?
  • Contributor: Sammi
    ^ I'm curious about that as well.

    Thanks for the review Smile
  • Contributor: RosesThorns
    Miss Cinnamon and Sammi - They are very informative about the lifestyle and what it means to be a Dom/sub and what to look for in a Dom/sub. The other chapters are more of How Tos.
  • Contributor: Wild at Heart
    Thank you for this review! =)
  • Contributor: Brownchique
    This seems like a great read. I was wondering whether you could provide more information about the specific contents.
  • Contributor: RosesThorns
    As soon as I get my copy back from the friend I lent it to I will post some specific chapter references and what not.
  • Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust
    I would like more specific information regarding the content and fi you know why this couple is in a position to write such a book.
  • Contributor: RosesThorns
    I have updated this review adding some more info.Big smile
  • Contributor: Requite
    Thanks for the recommendation - a copy's headed our way!
  • Contributor: RosesThorns
    @Requite - Awesome!
  • Contributor: RosesThorns
    @Requite - Awesome!
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