Ahhh, that's better. That last experience with the Fleshlight Ice Lady Crystal could have put me off Fleshlights for life had it been my first. Luckily I already owned three great ones, so all is not lost.

I bought The Count Cockula model a while back, and it packs a surprisingly powerful punch. I don't own any others in this range, but it seems that this is the only standalone design - i.e. it's not just a smaller version of something that's already made.

Count Cockula is made with the same SuperSkin material featured in all of the other regular Fleshlights. Rating as just a 5 on EF's Safety Scale, it's a medical & food-grade polymer material that can feel pretty lifelike if treated right (this often involves just sprinkling corn starch around the top). All Fleshlights require the use of water-based lube, this one even more so. I found this to be tighter than the full-sized counterparts so needed a little more lube than normal. I usually end up using Maximus on these, but that's mostly because I've got an almost full bottle that irritates my wife and I for any other use. A thinner lube would actually be ideal as the thicker Maximus can make things a little tacky sometimes.

The fangs that form part of the mouth are pretty deceptive. Your first thought might be one that involves teeth and oral sex, but don't worry - these are really just decorative and are exactly the same SuperSkin material as the rest of the sleeve. They simply push back out of the way when you enter the mouth, and you really don't feel them at all.

This is actually 2" shorter than the regular models at 7" long, it's also narrower, although apparently its 3/4" internal diameter is larger than most of the Sex In A Can range.


How the fangs REALLY look and measure up

I've told you before, don't talk with your mouth full

As usual, there's a twist cap on the bottom of the case that adjusts the vacuum. I generally start off with these opened slightly so as to allow easier entry.

Unlike other Fleshlights, the internal texture runs all the way down the inside, meaning that it feels the same no matter how far inside it you reach, which I found I prefer. Those fangs are each about 1/3" long and soft, so they don't so much stimulate as massage you. It's a nice feeling, and while it doesn't feel like you're having oral, they're good in their own right.


Eeny, meeny, miny, moe. Three are great but one must go

As opposed to my other Fleshlights, there's no visual aspect to this once you're using it. With the others, you get a little taste of sliding in and out of a real orifice. But the lips on the mouth here mean that the view is lacking.